On A Wing and A Prayer
by Ponchygirl
Summary: "He might not make it..." "If he does, he might not ever walk again." "His chances just dropped to 10%" someone got in a bad accident, and Bear is stuck with knowing he was mostly to blame.
1. Chapter 1

_Author's note:Thank you to my wonderful beta reader Tbookworm. For making this look much better than it did when I started out. Looking forward to doing the next chapters with you._

The sun shone warmly on Jon's golden blond hair as he sat at the worn scared picnic table waiting on his partner to finish lunch. The restaurant looked like it could fall apart any minute. The building smelled of fire and mold, as it had been through a fire and a small flood. Despite the appearance and smell they had eaten there anyway; Bear had promised them the best meal they had ever had. It was too bad that Bear and the rest of the gang could not join them today, but they were later than usual taking their lunch. It had been a hard morning of verbal abuse for the two officers as they had encountered three accidents and already pulled four motorists for unsafe driving. Luckily the accidents had not been major but that lead to name calling and blame placing, arguments and fights; as no one wanted to admit an accident was their fault. Jon knew his partner was already tired because his normally infectious smile was missing. "Baker, that food was terrific! I should let you pick the restaurants more often," Ponch enthused, startling Jon from his reverie while walking towards his motorcycle.

"Yeah, Bear showed me this place last week when you were at court during lunch," Jon replied, quickly catching up to his partner and best friend. He straddled the seat of his motorcycle as he fastened his helmet strap, then started the engine all while Ponch continued to rave about the restaurant.

"Well, I'm gonna have to tell him how great it is," Ponch said finally getting on his bike and fastening the chin strap of his own helmet as he too finally started his engine. Then he smiled tiredly at Jon, "No rest for the weary I guess. Ready to go, partner?" he asked.

"Yeah," Jon replied as they pulled out into the heavy traffic. Once safely moving with the flow of traffic Jon turned to his partner and called, "Hey Ponch, at least we got to sit down and finish a meal this time."

Ponch chuckled gently, remembering all the times they would be called out and be unable to finish their lunch.

 _Meanwhile…_

As they went about their day a call came in about a jewel thief. He was young about in his upper twenties. With dirty blonde hair, and a pair of sunglasses covering his eyes. The witnesses only saw a glimpse of him. He was wearing ripped blue jeans, and a faded red sweat shirt. He was riding a motorcycle. The motorcycle was stolen from the CHP and stripped of its equipment. So they'd been looking for this guy a while.

Jon was first to spot the guy that fit the description. And he saw a brown canvas bag in the man's hand as he rode off. The brown bag was possibly the carrying the jewels. Catching Ponch's attention Jon yelled over the noise of his bike and the traffic, "Ponch, I think I know where he's going! This street ends in a dead end alley just past Market, he will have to turn on Market to get away."

"I get it Baker," Ponch said "If you take Brooklyn you can cut over to where it intersects Market it's only a block back up Market to this street. You can get ahead of him and block his turn, if Bear can come down market from King he can block his turn from the other side then I can drive him into the alley. We'll have him cornered!" Ponch nodded his head slightly. They were behind the guy and it was a good plan. "Ok then, Baker, You get going and I'll follow the thief and radio in the plan." Ponch said enthusiastically.

"Sounds good, Ponch." Jon replied as he turned off to get into position. He could hear Ponch radioing for back up and instructing the others on the plan.

 _10 minutes later…_

"He's heading your way, Baker!" Ponch yelled into the mic.

"10-4, partner," Jon replied. He knew Ponch was behind the guy and had heard Sargent Joe Getraer and Officer Artie Grossman both radio that they had caught up to Ponch and would follow his lead. Officer Barry Baricza was supposed to be approaching the other way on Market to block the intersection so that Ponch could drive the thief into the dead end alley on his right. Jon was concerned because he had not heard Bear acknowledge Ponch's instructions. Seconds later Jon watched as the thief speed through the intersection. He immediately moved to arrest the young man.

 _Meanwhile…_

"I can pull up and stop him," Bear said to himself. He was still upset about an argument with Sindy at lunchtime, and his mind was not fully focused on his job. He was not really with it, and never radioed his intentions. Ponch looked back to see what Sarge was doing just to make sure he still had back up. Bear turned the corner and began to go right in front of where the thief had been going. He was starting to come to a stop. He looked over and all he saw was a motorcycle coming his way. He thought it was the thief, because the thief was on a stolen CHP motor. He inched the car closer.

"Frank, watch out!" Joe yelled. Ponch looked forward just in time to see the car move into the intersection right in his path. With no time to react Ponch collided with the cruiser in a screech of scraping metal and the crunch of breaking glass. Ponch was flipped over a few times on the car as he fell off and then hit the ground hard. There were a few snapping noises and the loud crack of his helmet as it impacted the pavement. Bear thought it was the criminal at first until he heard Jon radio that he caught the guy.

"If that wasn't the bad guy I hit, who did I…." he started then saw Sarge running towards the car. Realization dawning on him Bear's eyes got wide, as he quickly got out of the car to be met with the sight of, Ponch lying motionless on his stomach on the asphalt. His head was turned to the left toward Bears car and his helmet was still fastened securely on his head. There was some blood on his face and Bear could see shards of glass embedded near his eyes and nose. There were also abrasions on his right cheek from where he rolled slightly across the pavement before stopping. His left leg was at a strange angle, Bear wanted to be sick as he saw the ends of bone protruding from Ponch's thigh through a rip in his blood soaked pants. Bear looked at his car and could see the spots that had been hit. On the other side where the motorcycle hit there was a big dent. The motorcycle was lying sideways on the ground. The mirrors were broken, and there was no windshield anymore. The front was all scrunched, and smashed. After looking around Bear was certain now he didn't catch the bad guy, he hit Ponch. "Ponch? Oh, Ponch I'm sorry…" Bear said as he approached Ponch,

"You stay away, Baricza!" Joe said angrily and quickly.

Bear stepped back slightly in shock. "Sarge…." He started.

"Barry, the last thing he needs right now is you," Grossie told him as he joined.

"Guys, I didn't…." Bear started.

"Bear, you hit him," Grossie said. Joe was checking Ponch's injuries. He looked back at the two officers that were going back and forth at each other.

"Would you two quit it!? Grossman, you call for an ambulance. Baricza, you just stay out of the way. I have to talk to you," Joe said. Bear let out a long sigh, then stepped back and sat in his car. He knew if he tried to do anything he'd get into trouble.

"I didn't hit him," Bear told himself quietly. But quite honestly he wasn't sure who hit first, him or Ponch. Bear was starting to feel terrible about not paying enough attention. Joe heard a slight noise from Ponch.

"Hey, are you ok?" Joe asked. Ponch's eyes were open but held a glassy look, Joe could tell he wasn't fully there. "Hey, hang in there, ok?" Joe gently squeezed Ponch's hand. Soon Grossie was back beside him.

"Ambulance is on the way, so is Jon," Grossie said. Joe nodded.

"Hey, is he awake?" Grossie asked.

"Not really," Joe replied. From the way Ponch was whimpering and moaning Joe could tell he was in excruciating pain. "Hey, you're gonna be ok," Joe said trying to calm him down. He could tell Ponch was starting to go into shock, his breathing had changed to rapid shallow pants and he was shivering violently while covered with sweat. Bear wanted to get out of the car and be with his friend now. When he heard Sarge saying stuff to calm Ponch down he knew instantly that Ponch must be at least semiconscious. Jon arrived quickly. He rushed to Ponch.

"Hey, partner, are you ok?" he asked kneeling beside him while pulling off his gloves and helmet. He got no response except a slight moan.

While Jon spoke to Ponch, Joe called to Grossman, "Hey, Grossie bring me an emergency blanket will you? I think Ponch is in shock."

"What happened?" Jon asked looking over at Sarge. Joe was about to respond when Grossie interrupted.

"Bear hit him," he said as he handed Sarge the shiny silver emergency blanket from his motor.

Jon looked over towards Bear, and after seeing the look of sadness and shame on his face he was almost certain that what he was told was true. "But why?" Jon asked.

"It was an accident, Jon," Bear said quickly before anyone could guess at why it all happened. "I was trying to catch the bad guy…I guess I was a little distracted by other things that I didn't tell anyone what I was up to. I pulled out in front of Ponch…." He finished. Jon stared at him a little longer.

"You pulled out in front of him while he was in the middle of a pursuit? Bear, did you not hear the sirens and all his radio messages? He was expecting you to stop on Market to block the thief's turn. Instead you turn onto Ash in front of him!" Jon was infuriated now. "How dumb can ya get!?" he yelled.

Bear wanted to slam his head down on the steering wheel and scream. Instead he took a deep breath and said calmly, "Jon, I didn't want to hit him."

Jon looked at him. "Then why did you?" he replied, turning his attention back to his injured partner, not expecting an answer.

 _Moments Later…_

Joe was applying pressure to a pressure point on Ponch's left thigh above the protruding bone, while Jon talked softly to Ponch reassuring him that help was on the way. Jon could hear the sirens of firetrucks approaching. He looked up from where he sat beside his partner, as he recognized the engine and squad from Fire Station 51 he gave a sigh of relief. If Station 51 was responding it meant that Roy DeSoto and John Gage were the paramedics on duty and they were friends of both he and Ponch.

As Roy and Johnny approached the small group huddled on the side of the road, they were sad to see that their friend Ponch was the person in need of their help; but heartened to see that both Joe and Jon remembered the basic first aid they had taught their friends at CHP. They quickly stepped in and took over. As Johnny set up the radio to Rampart, Roy bent down beside Ponch.

"Having a rough day huh, Ponch?" Roy quipped to his friend, attempting to put him at ease and help him relax. He looked at Jon in concern as Ponch made no response other than a quickening of his breathing. He motioned to Jon to keep talking to Ponch and reassuring him as he began to check him over. Roy quickly took Ponch's vital signs frowning as he called to Johnny, "B/P 80 by palpation, Pulse 210 and weak, Respirations 85 and shallow, Eyes glassy and pupils sluggish, O2 83%, Lips and nails slightly cyanotic, Neck veins distended and no breath sounds on left side."

As soon as Johnny heard that Ponch was having trouble breathing he called to Chet, "Chet help Roy set up O2 while I call Rampart." He paused then continued, "Roy you thinking tension pneumothorax?"

"Almost certain," Roy replied. Having completed a cursory visual exam of the situation he relayed to Johnny, "Patient also has compound complex fracture of left femur, and possible head injury. Oh, and Johnny he is lying on his stomach, we will have to roll him over before we can perform a needle thoracotomy," Roy added.

Johnny nodded solemnly and turned to the radio, "Rampart Base this is rescue 51. Repeat Rampart Base this is rescue 5 1 come in Rampart," he called.

Immediately he was rewarded with hearing the response of, "Go ahead 51, Rampart here. This is Doctor Adams. What is your situation?"

"Rampart we have a 27 year old victim of a motorcycle accident. He has a compound complex fracture of the left femur, a possible head injury, and difficulty breathing. Vital signs are B/P 80 by palpation, Pulse 210 and weak, Respirations 85 and shallow, Eyes glassy and pupils sluggish, O2 83%, Lips and nails slightly cyanotic, Neck veins distended and no breath sounds on left side," Johnny reported.

Meanwhile at Rampart General Hospital…

"Understood 51," Doctor Adams responded he then paused a moment to think before continuing. He was concerned this poor man had so many things going on at once it was hard to know where to start. Well first stop the bleeding and replace fluids he thought. "51 Stabilize the fracture and start two wide bore IV's D5W,TKO with rapid flow, also apply Cervical collar and place patient on back board. Transport as soon as possible," He finally ordered. He looked up and noticed Dixie McCall standing nearby. "Dixie do the squads carry the equipment to perform a needle thoracotomy? And do they know how to perform one?" He questioned.

Dixie looked over and noticed the older Doctor's worried expression. "Well it is not a procedure they perform often but they have all been trained and carry the equipment to perform one if absolutely necessary. Why?" she thoughtfully responded.

"51 has a young man with distended neck veins, no breath sounds on the left side, who is cyanotic and struggling to breath. I am positive he is going from a closed pneumothorax to a tension pneumothorax. He also has a possible brain injury. He needs all the Oxygen he can get. If they can perform a needle thoracotomy in the field his chances of complete recovery increase by about 5%. I get the feeling he will need every advantage he has," Doctor Adams stated somberly.

"Doctor Adams you are in luck today. 51 is Roy Desoto's and John Gage's squad. If any of the paramedics can successfully perform a needle thoracotomy in the field it would be those two. Roy was a medic during Vietnam, he and Johnny are the best paramedics we have. But don't tell them I told you so," Dixie reassured the doctor.

Doctor Adams looked up and with a small relieved smile turned to the radio and stated "51 I also want you to perform a needle thoracotomy once your patient is on the backboard."

Meanwhile at the accident scene…

"Understood Doctor, stabilize the fracture and start two wide bore IV's D5W, TKO with rapid flow, also apply cervical collar and back board, perform needle thoracotomy." Johnny repeated the orders back to verify that they had them correct. He turned to Roy and said, "You heard the man Roy let's get busy." Together the paramedics completed the ordered procedures and quickly had their friend ready for transport to the hospital.

As they loaded Ponch into the ambulance Jon turned to Sergeant Getraer and said, "I'm riding with Ponch, Sarge." Joe just nodded knowing it was useless to argue.

 _Meanwhile…_

As Ponch was rushed into the hospital, and the rest of the officers dispersed to finish processing the scene or return to their normal patrols Joe pulled Bear aside. "We need to talk," he said.

"Sarge, am I going to get treated like crap until Ponch wakes up and puts an end to that like he normally does? Because I really don't need this," Bear said.

Joe looked away for a second then looked at him again. "I can't say one way or the other, but from the looks of it Jon isn't gonna let this go very easily," he replied.

Bear nodded. "That's what I thought, and now Grossie hates me too. I'm sure when everyone else finds out they'll kill me," he said.

"Hey, Baricza, you should've been paying more attention. Yes it is true that you both hit at the same time, so he hit you too…but he never would've if you didn't do that 'quick thinking' and pull out in front of him so fast." Joe reprimanded

Bear guiltily whispered, "I'm sorry, Sarge…I had a slight disagreement with Sindy during lunch and that was what I was focused on. I shouldn't have tried to help out I already knew I was not up to it."

"Well, next time you have an argument don't dwell on it too much until after work. You're supposed to have your mind on the job," Joe admonished. Bear sighed then stared at the ground.

Gently Joe reassured his officer, "Look Bear, I'm not as mad at you as everyone else. Sure I was really ticked off at first…but honestly I'm not going to make you feel miserable about it. You already feel bad enough why should I force you to feel worse. We do have to tell the captain what happened, and he'll decide punishment for you or if you even get it. Which since you put a life in danger I'm sure you will."


	2. Chapter 2

The waiting room at Rampart was filled with people. Most of them officers very few were just random people waiting to be helped. The room was painted a beige color that made it a little boring to look at. A man with a broken arm was waiting to be seen again. He had ruined his cast. Five fretful ladies were seated there waiting to see their husbands that had been rushed in earlier that day. In one corner sat a young woman and her small daughter, the little girl who couldn't have been more than two was crying and whining it was obvious from the bright pink cheeks and sweaty brow that the little girl had a high fever and did not feel well at all. As he cast a glance at the worn frazzled mother Jon repressed a regretful thought, ' _If Ponch were here right now he would have that little lady all smiles and her mother dozing in her chair while he engaged the little girl's attention.'_ He started to go offer the woman a hand then stopped himself knowing he did not have the way with children that his partner had. ' _Has! Baker Has!_ '' he corrected his thoughts. Most of the officers were scattered around the room keeping mostly to themselves. A few of them were actually sitting together. Six officers were enjoying a fish tank that had been put in the waiting room for the enjoyment of people waiting. A few of the officers were watching the TV. It was playing the news. Their stomachs were in knots when they saw what was being talked about.

"Why do they have to talk about the jewel thief now?" Asked an officer named Jarrod. He turned to his best friend Kevin. "It's awful, like the news reporters know we are all waiting for news," he added. As he heard the news lady talking about a CHP officer critically injured during the chase of the jewel thief.

"I don't think I can watch anymore," Grossie said. He had been standing behind them watching the TV also. He then walked away to go talk to Getraer.

Jon happened to catch a glance at the TV. He had an urge to go change the channel. He didn't want to hear about that jewel thief anymore. If there was no jewel thief there might not have been an accident. Instead Jon just turned his attention to the design painted on the hallway walls. Nothing exhilarating, just a few squiggly colored lines blue, green, pink, and red it made him smile slightly. Jon remembered not too long ago when they painted that. Ponch almost got painted too. The lady painting was Ponch's girlfriend at the time. As she was painting, Ponch and Jon walked in to check on an accident victim. When Ponch ran into Jess, he teased her saying he could paint squiggles better than she did. Jon had just watched and he laughed when Jess threatened to paint squiggles on Ponch. Jon turned his head from the squiggles, he couldn't take it anymore. At first the memory was sweet, but then a thought crossed his mind making him not want to think of it anymore. _'What if we never get a fun memory like that again?'_ he thought. He tried to shake it from his mind.

' _No, Baker…think positive, Ponch is going to be ok,_ ' he told himself. He just wasn't convinced by those words. Jon paced the floors nervously waiting for some news about his best friend and partner.

Bear sat in a chair in the corner of the waiting room. Leaning his head against the wall, praying he didn't kill his friend. Next to Bear sat a very confused and worried Officer Sindy Cahill. No one had informed her what had happened, she just knew Ponch was rushed in. Next to Sindy was Officer Bonnie Clark. She was just staring blankly ahead at the wall. Lost in thought, she was worrying about Ponch.

Officer Jeb Turner paced the hallways. He hated the waiting area it smelled like fish today. They had a lot of fishermen come in with injuries. Most the injuries were from getting caught in their fishing hooks. Jeb couldn't stand the smell of fish, sea, and live bait. He wasn't sure how anyone else could stand it either. The hallways were brightly lit, and smelled like wedding cake. It made no sense how it could smell like that, but they just got a new air freshener to make it smell nicer than blood, and other body fluids that had dripped on that floor.

Not too far from Jeb were Grossie, Sarge, and Jon. Sarge and Grossie were quietly discussing something. Jeb refused to eavesdrop. He wasn't in the mood for it. He knew if he did, and he wasn't supposed to he'd be in a lot of trouble. Simply because Sarge was pretty uptight right now due to the current situation. Soon Jeb hear Jon's voice talking loudly. He sounded upset. He turned and saw a doctor standing there. A doctor he'd rarely seen, but then again he rarely went to Rampart in the first place. The doctor had neatly cut dark almost black hair. He had light skin, and bright blue eyes. Jeb wanted to go join the conversation, but he figured that was a bad idea. So, he just listened.

"Why won't you tell me what is wrong with him?" Jon asked for what must've been the millionth time.

"I have told you what I can. I can only discuss his injuries with family," the doctor replied.

"But his family is halfway across the country. You don't get it **WE** , all of us here in this room, **ARE** his **Family** ," Jon stressed, "And all you will say about his injuries, is that he is in surgery and is in critical condition."

The doctor sighed. "Officer Baker, if I knew…what I mean is…" the doctor was struggling with words. He scratched the back of his neck while biting his lip. Jon stared at him.

"Come on, out with it. What's wrong with my partner?" Jon asked. He was trying to remain calm but inside he just wanted to let loose and freak out. He stayed professional mostly because he was supposed to, and because he was in the hospital everyone would be watching if he didn't.

The doctor once again bit his lip and all he said was, "Well…" he stopped and never finished. Jon was getting really anxious now. Something about the way the doctor was talking to him just told him something was seriously wrong. "Was Officer Poncherello sick at all before he came to work?" the doctor asked finally.

"Well, maybe a little…no actually I was gone but I remember him saying something about pneumonia last week…I think. I could be wrong. I mean he talks so fast sometimes it's hard to keep up," Jon started.

"Ok…well that's good to know. Do you know if he is completely recovered?"

"Well, he had a bit of a cough before lunch…I don't remember much," Jon started. "Oh wait, he said that he was ok enough to work, but not fully better. That was why he was acting kind of funny in briefing. He didn't want to be too close to people just in case he was still sick." With Jon lost in thought focusing on anything he remembered that might help the doctors help his friend; Doctor Ryan Adams silently slipped away.

 _A little while later, in the Doctor's Lounge . . ._

Dr. Adams sat in the doctor's lounge staring at the table he was seated at. He was silent, all that ran through his mind was about the injured officer, and all the officers waiting for news. He was so lost in thought he didn't hear the door open. In walked a short thin dark haired tan skinned woman. Her smile that she had before coming in suddenly disappeared when she saw Dr. Adams sitting there in silence. Before even asking she could tell something was wrong. When she had walked through the door she was hit by the delightful smell of fresh coffee brewing. So she decided she'd start off with getting coffee. She slowly walked over to the counter that held the coffee pot and cups.

"Want some?" she asked as she pulled out two cups.

"I guess it wouldn't hurt," came Dr. Adams' soft reply. His voice was barely above a whisper. She poured the coffee then sat down across from him.

"What's wrong?" she asked as she sipped her coffee.

"I don't want that officer to die," he told his girlfriend Nurse Bex, her name was Rebecca but she got the nickname Bex as a child and it just stuck with her. Bex's eyes softened, she put a hand on Ryan's hand. Her hands were much smaller than his were. She looked at him, then with her other hand lifted his head up. Putting her hand on his chin,

"Ryan you need to turn this case over to another doctor. The number one rule around here is don't take a case if you are emotionally involved. You know what will happen if you don't relinquish the case and someone finds out. ," Bex said. She was concerned about her boyfriend's interaction with this patient. He seemed like he might know the young officer.

Dr. Adams looked at her and snorted, "Practically turned it over to Brackett already. He and Early took him up for exploratory surgery 20 minutes ago. You want to know why I really didn't tell his friends anything. It was because I don't know anything. I had not finished the complete neurological exam before we found internal bleeding and let's not forget he had a tension pneumothorax treated in the field by paramedics. Paramedics Bex! Bex, I'm scared for this guy's life. I already lost a lot patients this month. It will look bad on my record. Most of them were victims of hit and run…well at least this case is a little different. The person that hit him didn't run…"

"The person that hit him was another cop. Of course he didn't run…but also you have to know Officer Poncherello and Officer Baricza hit around the same time. So it's not fully Baricza's fault," Bex said. Ryan was silent and bit his lip. Bex waited for him to talk. She knew he had something to say. Finally his mouth opened again after a minute of silence.

"Bex, that Officer Poncherello…he reminds me a lot of a guy I once knew. His name was Alfred Poncherello…he was my best friend growing up." Bex was silent. She wasn't sure what to say about that.

"Why aren't you friends anymore?" she unexpectedly asked. The question left Ryan silent again. He knew they were friends still, just the fact they never saw each other bugged him. So he stayed silent trying to determine the best way to go about explaining this whole situation.

"We are…but he started his own business and moved away to Chicago. I only met his family twice. I got to see three of his kids the first time. Because his wife was pregnant with the fourth one at the time…I helped deliver his fourth child…that was one of the last times I ever saw him."

"Oh…so do you ever talk?" Bex asked curiosity rising in her voice.

"Um, sometimes…the thing is…I feel like I know Officer Poncherello so well…the reason is…he was Alfred's fourth child…when Alfred and I talk with each other, he tells me all about his kids. I hear a lot about Frank Poncherello and the only time I ever met him was when he was born…now seeing him…he looks more like his dad than any of his siblings do." Ryan is silent again.

"Well I guess it's a good thing Brackett and Early took over the case," Bex comforted.

 _Meanwhile…_

Jeb saw Jon standing in the hallway looking shocked. Like something startling had happened. Jeb nudged Getraer slightly.

"Hey, Sarge…go talk to Jon. It looks like something's wrong," he said.

"Why can't you talk to him?" Joe asked inquisitively.

"Well…it's a better idea for you to do it," Jeb said. Joe just nodded then walked over to Jon. He placed a hand on Jon's shoulder.

Jon jumped slightly, "Oh, hi Sarge…"

"What's wrong?" Joe asked.

Jon tried to explain, but words just were not his friend today. He simply went with this, "He just walked off," he started. Joe knew what Jon meant when he said 'he.'

Joe looked at Jon. "Are you sure he just walked off? I mean doctors don't normally do that. Were you even talking to the doctor?"

"Sarge, are you trying to say I wasn't talking to him? I'm not crazy he was here, and he walked away. Believe me," Jon said.

Joe nodded his head. "I believe you, I just don't understand it," he said. Jon was quiet.

"I wish I knew what was going on here. These people are all acting wacky. I'm not sure I like it…" Bear said joining them.

Jon jumped slightly at the sound of Bear's voice. He wasn't expecting to see him any time soon. Last time they talked Jon was so ticked off that he made it clear to Bear he didn't ever want to speak to him again. "Bear…I'm sorry, I over reacted earlier…" Jon started.

"It's ok, maybe I deserved it. But you of all people…I didn't expect it from you," Bear said.

"I am sorry, Bear. I know we are all family and I care about every one of my fellow officers, it's just that…with Ponch its different somehow…we're so close that I think of him like a real little brother. I panicked, and my temper got the better of me. I would say it won't happen again, but…" Jon stated.

"Yea, I know. It's ok, Jon I forgive you," Bear said with a slight smile feeling a little more relaxed knowing Jon was calming down.

"I wish I knew what Ponch's injures are," Jon said quietly.

"Maybe Ponch knows," Bear offered.

"Well, we can't ask him," Jon snapped. Bear stepped back slightly. "Not only can we not see him, he's unconscious, Bear!"

"Sorry, Jon," Bear said a few seconds after Jon's little outburst.

"No, I'm sorry, Bear. This whole thing has got me uptight. The doctor won't tell me anything besides he is in surgery and in critical condition. Oh, and he mentioned something about possible head or spine injuries. He really wasn't very detailed."

Bear put a hand on Jon's shoulder. "He'll be ok, Jon. It's Ponch we're talking about. He's always ok…he's a fighter, he's stubborn, always got to prove that doctor wrong…and man I don't think I know a single person in this world that has determination like Ponch. He'll stop at nothing to get better, and you know it," Bear said.

Jon nodded his head. "You got that right, Bear. I still just wish they'd tell me what is wrong and let me see him." was Jon's shaky response.


	3. Chapter 3

The room was now pretty quiet. Most of the officers that were there had been told to either go home or get back on patrol. The only ones still there were Jon, Joe, and Bear. Bear fell asleep still seated in that chair over by the wall. Jon and Joe stood over by the TV watching and chatting with each other quietly. Bear stirred but didn't wake up. Jon's eyes were glued to that TV.

"Sarge, I want them to stop reporting about this," he finally told his sergeant and friend.

"Baker, you don't have to watch," Joe replied. Then they saw the doctors walking over.

Jon's eyes shone with both hope and relief when he saw Doctor Kell Brackett. Both he and Ponch considered the cantankerous doctor a friend and he was hoping that he would give him the straight answers he needed. "Oh I hope you guys have got some answers," Jon said when they met up. Dr. Adams, Dr, Early, and Dr. Brackett all had an expression on their face that Jon couldn't read. "What's…what's wrong?" Jon asked a lump forming in his throat.

Dr. Brackett was first to clear his throat to speak. "Well Jon, Ponch has a number of different injuries," he started.

"He might not be waking up anytime soon," Dr. Adam's cut in. "Something happened a few minutes ago, and his chances of living dropped down to ten percent."

Jon gasped, "No…can I see him?" he asked. The response he got was silence. He waited a few moments. Finally Dr. Early broke the silence.

"I think it may be best that you don't visit right now. He's not up to having visitors," he said. Jon stared down at the tiled floor.

Dr. Brackett figured it would be best that he take Jon to his office to tell him what was wrong. There was no sense in leaving him in the dark. He cleared his throat again. "Jon, if you follow me…I'll tell you what is wrong with Ponch," Kell said.

Jon sighed a breath of relief. "Finally, someone's going to tell me what's going on," he said following Brackett. They walked into Kell's office. Kell's office was spacious and comforting. It contained the normally expected items of a desk, some chairs, a computer, a bookcase, even the obligatory office plant was present. Jon took a seat facing the desk and the bookcase. As he waited for Kell to begin he studied the book titles. There were medical journals, pharmacological catalogues, obstetrics manuals, something called a Merck Manual, medical dictionaries and other books Jon could not begin to make out. Kell saw what he was studying and smirked, "Patients think Doctors pull diagnoses out of thin air, or off the top of their head. Most of us have to research and study to find answers to help our patients."

"Jon," Kell began, "I've already told you that Ponch has a number of different injuries. I won't sugar coat things, each one individually is serious, together they may prove more than Ponch can handle. Now first, you know that Roy and Johnny were ordered to treat a tension pneumothorax in the field, I want to explain what that is and what they did to treat it Ok?" Kell looked at Jon to see if he was following the discussion.

Jon gave a small nod, "Yeah, Ok," he quietly agreed.

Kell continued, "Alright, a pneumothorax is an injury to a lung that allows air to get between the lung and the chest wall. Now this is what Ponch had at first, it was caused by a broken rib puncturing his lung. It made it a little hard for him to breath but was not a critical situation. However, air continued to collect between his lung and his chest wall until the pressure was high enough to keep the blood from returning to his heart. At that time it became a critical situation as there was less blood for the heart to pump to the body and it had to work harder to get it there. Also the blood had less oxygen in it so the brain and other organs had less oxygen to use. It was sort of like he was suffocating even though he was trying to breath. As you know the human body can only last a short time without oxygen that is why Doctor Adams ordered Roy and Johnny to perform a needle decompression. Basically, they inserted a large needle into the pleural space to remove the air. One of the things we did up in surgery was insert a chest tube to continue to drain air and allow the lung to re-inflate. That is known as a thoracotomy, and that tube will need to remain in place for a couple of days." Kell paused to give Jon a chance to take in everything that had been said so far.

"Jon I need you to understand that so far we have only been able to do a patch job on Ponch's injuries," Kell stated. He continued, "There are just so many injuries and some are so severe we have to take things one step at a time. Once Roy and Johnny got Ponch here and we started our evaluation we immediately noticed that his abdomen was ridged and distended which is an indication to us of internal bleeding. The bleeding was confirmed by an abdominal ultrasound and we rushed him to the operating room for exploratory surgery to find the source of the bleeding and stop it. I was the one performing that portion of the surgery and what I found was that he had ruptured his spleen and had a four inch gash in one lobe of his liver. I had no choice but to remove his spleen. I tried to surgically repair the laceration to the liver but I could not get the bleeding under control, so I had to remove that lobe of the liver."

"Doc, I've heard that people can live without their spleen, but don't they need their whole liver?" Jon questioned shakily his face pale.

"Well Jon, the liver is an amazing organ as long as you leave twenty five percent of it, it will regrow over time. Ponch is lucky, I only removed one lobe that is about a third, and it should not take more than a few months for him to regrow that. In fact he could regrow his liver before he leaves the rehabilitation hospital. As for losing his spleen, it is true that you can live without it but you become very susceptible to viruses and bacteria. He will need to see his doctor immediately if he starts feeling ill.

"Doc," Jon said, "So far nothing you have said accounts for the grave looks on the faces of Doctor Adams, Doctor Early, and yourself a few minutes ago. So what have you not told me yet?"

"You're right Jon there is more and its worse, are you ready to hear the rest or do you need a break?" Kell inquired.

"I want to hear it all, Doc," Jon maintained, "Let's keep going."

Kell walked over to his water cooler and poured a paper cup of water. Returning to his desk he handed the water to Jon and said, "Ok, I'll keep going but do me a favor and drink that water you're as pale as some corpses I've seen. And Jon take some deep breaths I don't need to be treating you too," he added with a small smile.

Jon returned his smile weakly said, "Yeah I hear you, Doc." He then made a point of taking a couple of deep breaths.

"Since we knew we had to take Ponch into surgery to find the bleeding anyway, we called Orthopedic in to set his leg while he was under."Kell continued. "Because the bone came through the skin Ortho cannot put a traditional cast on until the wound heals. So what they have done is place an external fixation device. It is basically a cage around the leg holding the bones in place. It looks a lot like a medieval torture device because there are long pins going from the device into the bone. Everyday those pins and the wound site will be cleaned to prevent infection. Now a major complication of breaks like Ponch has is the formation of blood clots near the break. If a clot forms it does one of two things, it stays in the leg causing thrombosis which is swelling, redness, irritation, infection, and cell death; or it breaks off and travels to the lungs which is called a pulmonary embolism, if that happens it is often fatal even in hospitals. So to prevent that from happening we have him on a medicine called Heparin. Heparin's sole purpose is to thin the blood and prevent it from clotting." It seemed like Kells lecture was starting to wind down.

Jon risks the question, "Is that the worst of it?"

Kell answers with a sympathetic, "No, Jon. That just brings us to what has aggravated the worst of it."

"What do you mean Doc?" Jon questions.

"Well, Jon," Kell explains, "It was obvious that Ponch hit his head rather hard since his helmet cracked. We were worried that he had a bleed in the brain. Now many times a bleed will be small and the body's natural clotting abilities take care of the problem without doctors having to do anything other than wait. We were hoping that that would be the case here and it almost was, until we had to give Ponch the Heparin. The Heparin broke down the clot in Ponch's brain and the bleed started up again. This time even faster."

"Doc if Ponch is unconscious how do you know his brain is bleeding again?" Jon questioned.

"That is a good question, Jon," Kell replied, "and the short answer is seizures."

"Doc I don't follow, what do you mean?" queried Jon

"I apologize, Jon," Kell said with a rueful chuckle, "I'll explain further. You see one sign that the pressure in the brain is getting to high is seizures. Ponch had two in the operating room. Doctor Early specializes in neurology and he was concerned about the Heparin causing Ponch's brain to bleed again so he was already placing an ICP or intracranial pressure monitor when the first seizure happened. Doctor Early chose to use a Subdural Screw which is hollow screw that is inserted through a hole drilled in the skull. It is placed through the membrane that protects the brain and spinal cord (dura mater). This allows the sensor to record from inside the subdural space." Kell watched Jon sit staring at the floor a few moments before he walked around his desk and placed his hand on Jon's shoulder saying, "Jon, I know this is a lot of information, but I need you to understand all of this is just the things we had to do to get him stable; we still have to treat the injuries."

Jon's head snapped up and with blazing eyes he looked at Kell and quickly bit out, "Doc are you telling me that with all he has been through you have not fixed a single injury?"

Kell just nodded and said, "Before you start in on me remember we had to get him stable first. Now do you want to hear the plan to patch him up?"

"Of course I do, he's my best friend, my partner, and a little brother. He is family. I need to know, so that I can be there for him," Jon stated quietly.

"Ok," Kell said, "The first thing you need to know is that we had to shave his hair to place the ICP monitor and since we did we decided to play it safe and hook him up to an EEG Electroencephalogram to monitor his brain waves. We also have him hooked up to a heart monitor, which also checks blood pressure, respiration, and oxygen saturation levels just as a safety precaution. Even though he is in a coma we are giving him medicines that keep him in the coma until we think he has healed enough to be able to deal with the pain and confusion. We placed him on a mechanical ventilator a device that delivers air into the lungs through a tube placed within the windpipe. It is not that he cannot breathe on his own, but with the tear in his lung and being on the coma inducing drugs, the vent makes it easier for him. Since we plan to keep him in a medically induced coma for several days we placed a nasogastric tube to provide nourishment. All of this will continue to keep him stable."

"Doc you said you are keeping him the coma because of the pain he would be in. Would it really be that bad?" Jon questioned.

"Yes, Jon, in these first few days especially," Kell responded. He continued, "Now, the most important thing is to find the bleed in his brain and get it to stop. Normally we would use an MRI to get a picture of what is going on in that head of his; but because of the ICP and the external fixation device we cannot use that, so Doctor Early and I have decided to use a combination of Myelogram and Angiogram. The myelogram will give us a picture of nerves of the brain and spinal cord, while the angiogram will give us a picture of the veins of the brain and spinal cord. Once we find the bleeding vessel Doctor Early will go in and cauterize the bleed. A couple of days later Ortho will take him in to surgery and plate the fractured femur. The external fixation device will have to remain for a month or so until the surgical site heals; then he will most likely get a cast. While they have him in surgery Ortho will also set and pin the broken rib. We will wait two or three days after the surgeries are complete and then begin weaning him off of the coma inducing medications. Once he wakes up and is coherent enough to respond to prompts we will remove the vent and NG tube."

"Doc," Jon questioned, "Doctor Adams said Ponch only has a ten percent chance of survival, do you agree?"

Kell pause and thought a moment before answering, "NO! Jon I don't believe in percentages and chances. I have seen people that should have died turn out to be fine; and I have also seen people that should have been fine drop dead a day or two after an accident. So no, I believe in my patients and their families instead."

With a small smile Jon looked at Kell and said, "Thanks, Doc." As he stood to leave.

Kell looked at Jon and said, "I also don't believe in keeping friends and family away from seriously injured patients. Ponch is in ICU but if you agree to step out when the nurses need to perform their tasks you can sit with him any time you want. But only you, the others have to stick to the ICU visitor schedule and only two at a time then. Oh and Jon, you can't make yourself sick staying here all the time you have to eat and sleep."

"I promise Doc, I promise," whispered Jon with tears of gratitude shining in his eyes.

oOoOo

After the talk with the doctor, Jon was feeling a little at ease knowing what was wrong. But on edge knowing how serious the injuries and condition of his partner were.

As soon as Jon stepped out of the office he was greeted by Dr. Adams. "Hi, sorry to bug you…but have you called Officer Poncherello's family yet?" he asked.

"No…" Jon started.

"Ok, leave that to me then. I need to talk with Alfred," he replied.

Jon nodded. "Ok…" he said not sure what else to tell him. Jon walked away and Dr. Adams went to the phone in the doctor's lounge. He dialed the number that he just so happened to know by heart. He stood there impatiently waiting while the phone rang. Ryan stared at the dark walls in the room. Finally he heard someone on the other end of the phone line.

"Hello, this is Alfred Poncherello."

"Hi, Alfred…its Ryan Adams," Ryan replied he was somewhat relieved to hear his friends voice, but saddened by what he had to tell him.

"Oh hey, Ryan!" Alfred said cheerfully. _"Dang it! He's in a good mood,"_ Ryan thought, starting to beat himself up. "Is something wrong?" Alfred asked suddenly realizing Ryan should be working right now.

"I wish I was calling for a more happy reason, Alfred. But sometimes doctors are stuck with the bad stuff. I'm sorry to inform you of this, but your son…" Dr. Adams began. As soon as he said 'son' Alfred interrupted.

"What's wrong with Frank? What happened?" Alfred asked. Ryan cleared his throat a few times before he spoke.

"He was involved in a near fatal accident…" Ryan started. He heard Alfred gasp on the other end. He searched for words to say quickly before his friend freaked out. "He's in ICU…he's gonna be ok. It'll just take a while to get back to normal…"

"Ok, you still work at Rampart, right?" Alfred asked quickly before Ryan could say more.

"Yes." Ryan choked out past the lump in his throat.

"I'll be there as soon as I can." demanded Alfred abruptly, "Explain everything to me when I arrive."

"I will," Ryan said.

"Good, I'll see you in a while," Alfred said. He hung up before even saying goodbye. Ryan slowly hung the phone back up. He went to go sit down at the table again. Soon the door opened up and in walked Bex.

"Oh, hi…I didn't realize you were in here. Did you need a moment alone?" Bex asked when she noticed how upset Ryan looked.

"No, Bex…I need you to sit with me," he said. Bex cautiously walked over.

"What's going on?" she asked. She took a seat across from him in an orange very comfortable chair.

"I just called Alfred Poncherello…" Ryan started. Bex put a comforting hand on Ryan's hands.

"Ryan, listen to me…you don't need to be this down in the dumps after calling an old friend," she started.

"But Bex, it wasn't a happy normal conversation! For Pete's sake I was calling to tell him his son was in ICU!" Ryan snapped pulling his hand away.

Bex stared at him with a hurt look in her eyes. She wasn't expecting to get snapped at when she tried to talk to Ryan. Ryan softened when he saw the look in his girlfriend's eyes. "I'm sorry, Bex…it's just…I shouldn't be like this," Ryan said slamming his fist down on the table. Bex stared at him.

"I don't think you should get involved in this," she began. Ryan stared deep into her blue eyes.

"Bex, I need to know what is going on. If I get myself not involved…" he started. Bex started to stand up.

"I'm sorry, honey. I don't want you in trouble. You're breaking a number one rule," Bex said. Ryan slowly nodded his head.


	4. Chapter 4

_Bear sat in his car he slowly inched closer and closer to his destination. He saw the guy on his motorcycle coming fast. "I'm gonna get him," he thought to himself. He looked down at his notepad to see the notes he'd taken on the description of the man to see if that was the right guy. Suddenly he heard his sergeant's voice screaming a name. Bear wasn't paying enough attention to know what was said then he felt a thump as his cruiser and the motorcycle hit hard. He felt the rider being thrown off the bike and rolled across the hood of Bear's car._

 _Thinking he was triumphant in his attempt to catch the criminal only lasted seconds as soon he heard Jon's voice over the radio saying he caught the thief. Now Bear was confused. As he got out of the car he nearly died at the sight before his eyes. Then he was hit with the most overwhelming and disturbing senses of guilt. "I hit Ponch…"_

Bear woke up from the nightmare that had haunted him ever since the accident. He couldn't sleep without thinking about his mistakes, well one mistake in particular. "I should've told them what I was doing," he said to himself quietly as he pushed his covers down and crawled out of bed. He had a rough night. Jon never told him how Ponch was doing after he had finished speaking with the doctor. He just went straight for Ponch's room. Bear was getting a little antsy. He couldn't even sit still anymore without thinking about it.

 _That same night in another part of town…._

Jon had tried to heed Kell's advice, he truly had. He had gone home last night at 8pm when visiting hours ended. He was physically and emotionally exhausted so he ate a light supper and turned in for the night. The problem was he had tossed and turned all night. By 4 am he gave up the fight and called Joe telling him that he hadn't gotten any sleep because he was worried about Ponch. He asked Joe to allow him to take some of his personal leave time; because until Ponch wakes up he will not be able to concentrate on the job and would be putting his fellow officers in danger. Joe granted Jon's leave request because he knew that Jon had a point and would not have asked lightly. He did warn Jon that IA was starting their investigation and told him that he would have to come in to the station to answer questions when they were ready for him. Jon agreed and 6 am found him slipping down the dimly lit hallways of Rampart General Hospital into Ponch's room in ICU. The rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor and the gentle whoosh of the ventilator combined with the dim lighting had almost lulled Jon to sleep when he heard the click of a door opening.

"Sorry to bug you…uh Sir…but I need to get in here and check Officer Poncherello vitals," said a young nurse with long dark hair and smooth tan skin. She was about 5'4 and 130lbs. A small little nurse she was. She looked to be about in her twenties. Behind her was another nurse that looked almost the same only with dark red hair pulled back into a thick ponytail.

"Oh ok…I'll leave if you want," Jon said starting to get up, "My name is Jon by the way, Jon Baker. And everyone calls him either Frank or Ponch."

"We're only checking his vitals you're not in the way," said the redhead. Jon nodded and sat back down. The redhead nurse smiled at him. "Good Morning! We just came on shift a few minutes ago at seven o'clock. Night shift said he had a quite night but we like to check anyway. I'm Brandi Mitchell this is my sister Nikki. We're going to be the main nurses you'll see during the day. Doctor Brackett just called up and told us that Ponch would be taken to have his angiogram at 8 O'clock this morning and taken directly from there to have his myelogram. He seemed to think that they could operate as soon as they had the results of both tests. I doubt he returns to his room before his surgery. You are welcome to wait here with him until they come to get him for the tests but then you should wait in the surgery waiting room."

"Thank you. Nice to meet you, Brandi…Nikki," Jon replied waving slightly.

Nikki just smiled and rolled her eyes at Brandi. She could tell her sister liked Jon. Nikki finished her job, wrote the vitals down in a clipboard then started to head for the door. "Well thanks for letting us pop in," she said then started to open the door.

"Hopefully we get to see you again, "Brandi said with a wink then followed her sister. Nikkie rolled her eyes. When both Nikki and Brandi were out of the room and the door was closed Nikki looked at her sister. "You like him, don't you?" she asked.

"Well…" Brandi started.

"Sis I know that look…I have to agree he is kinda cute. But not my type of guy," Nikki said leading her sister to the next room. Brandi just smiled and followed her younger sister.

 _Meanwhile back at Central…_

Bear sat in the captain's office. He looked around the room there was a nice big desk that the captain sat behind. The desk was very clean on the top. There was a desk lamp and some papers that was pretty much it. In the corner of the room was a small wooden stand that held a plant. Next to the plant was a tiny refrigerator. Bear wasn't sure who the captain was talking to, but he'd been waiting about fifteen minutes. It apparently was an important call. Bear stared at the freshly painted sky blue walls. It had just been repainted two days ago.

Finally the captain was saying good bye. He hung up the phone and looked at Bear. "Baricza, as I was saying before. While the IA is doing their investigation and asking questions you'll be restricted to desk duty. You should know right now they won't be finished until Poncherello is able to talk to them. So it may be a few days."

Bear nodded, "That's fine," he said.

"Baricza, I am going to give you a piece of advice now and I want you to listen to me and take me seriously. IA's report, Joe's report, and my report all have to go to the review board. This is too big not to be handled by the Review Board. You need to get yourself a lawyer if you don't already have one. You will need representation when you talk to the Review Board," said the captain sternly. "You were careless, what do you think would have happened if a civilian happened to be riding where Poncherello was? Your carelessness nearly killed like this doesn't get left untouched.I think it's important you know you will punished."

Bear cleared his throat before he spoke. "Yeah I know. I'm really sorry about all of this," he said. The captain leaned back in his chair.

"You don't have to apologize to me. It's Poncherello that needs that," the captain replied. Bear clenched his fists tight. "Relax, Baricza. We are not out to get you. You made a mistake that happens. What Joe and I are upset at, is the fact that you made the mistake, because you were careless or distracted or whatever you want to call it. You were already clued-in by Joe that you would be punished…"

"I know, I know…" Bear started. He rubbed his sweaty palms on his pants. "Do you know how awful it feels knowing you're the main cause of your best friend being critically injured in the hospital?" The captain said nothing.

 _Meanwhile in Ponch's hospital room…_

Jon sat in the calm still room. The quiet was making him rather sleepy again. So he made a mental note to bring something with him next time to keep him going. Something like a book. Then he smiled, he knew Ponch hated reading, but he loved it when someone read to him. So he decided on bringing a book to read to him. Then he'd just talk about other random things. Jon bounced his leg a little and sat in the room he was at a loss for words. Normally Ponch had something to say to him, but right now it was Jon's turn to talk without being interrupted by his perky best friend…and he didn't know what to tell him. He cleared his throat.

"Uh…I heard Bear is talking to the captain today…" he said then stopped himself scolding himself silently knowing that shouldn't be what he was talking about. He needed to talk about something happy. "I hope all goes well. I'm sure if you were awake you'd help Bear out," Jon added. He then turned to the wall trying to think up a good story or something to tell Ponch.

Finally he looked at him again with a smile. "Oh I think you'll like your nurses. I met two today…Brandi and Nikkie I think is what they said their names were. Brandi had long dark red hair. She was gorgeous, partner. Nikkie was pretty good looking too, she had hair in a bun but I think it probably would go down to her waist with how much of it I saw…Brandi had her hair up in a ponytail…I know if you were awake you'd already be figuring this out and asking me by now…the answer is yes. I do like Brandi. I can't wait to her your opinion on them though." Jon finished speaking and leaned back in his chair. He wasn't sure where to go from there. A few minutes before eight o'clock two orderlies poked their head around the corner of the doorway and indicated that they were to take Ponch for the scheduled tests. Jon looked at his partner and said, "Hey partner, the orderlies are here to transport you downstairs for your tests, and surgery so I will see you later ok. You know if Doctor Adams got through to your family I bet someone is on their way right now. I better go clean up that pigsty you call an apartment. Kell promised he would call me and keep me up to date on how the tests went before he starts the surgery. I'll keep praying Ponch." Turning to the orderlies he joked, "No speeding down the hallways guys, or when he wakes up he will have to give you a ticket." He then turned and left.

 _Later at Central…._

Bear sat at the front desk doing paper work waiting for something to happen. No phone calls were coming in and no people had come in for help either. It was way too quiet. Soon he felt a hand tap his shoulder. He turned his head and saw Sindy smiling at him. "I figured you were hungry I brought you some food," she said. Bear smiled and happily took the sandwich being handed to him.

"Thanks," he said then took a big bite. "This is really good," he said with food in his mouth as he was still chewing. Sindy laughed.

"You're welcome…enjoy," she said then walked out the door. Soon Bear felt another hand on his shoulder. He turned and saw the captain standing there. His smile faded.

"This can't be good…what now?" Bear asked. The captain laughed slightly at the sour expression.

"Not every time you see me is for a bad reason," he told him. Bear nodded while wiping his mouth with a napkin. "But sadly this isn't a pleasant conversation. I'm sure you can handle it though." Bear nodded. "So I'm trying to warn you in case it goes this far…If IA finds enough cause The Review Board can charge you with negligence in the field and recommend a trial by tribunal."

"A what?" Bear asked confused.

"Basically what would happen is three higher up officers will hear the evidence. You and your Lawyer will have a chance to plead your case."

"That doesn't sound like much fun…"

"Sometimes life isn't always full of fun, Baricza," the captain said sadly. Bear got up to throw away the napkin and wrapper that had been around his sandwich.

"Well I wish life would stop throwing so much stuff at me. It's bad enough I hit my best friend…it was an accident, honest! I never intended on even hitting anyone or anything. I still don't know how it all happened. If I were paying more attention I would've know how close I was…and that it was Ponch is was hitting and not the jewel thief. I thought I caught the jewel thief…but no I nearly killed an officer…" Bear said sitting back down in his chair. The captain was quiet, he wanted to comfort Bear, but at the same time words weren't his friend. There was nothing he could say right now to help ease Bear's pain. So he began to walk away, soon he bumped into Lt. Bates.

"Sorry…" Bates said after gathering himself together. "It isn't like me to be careless…"

"No I wasn't watching where I was going. I am the one who should be saying sorry," the captain admitted.

"Are you all right? You don't normally…" Bates started. The captain took him to his office to talk.

"I don't want to stand out in the halls for all to hear," the captain started. "Joe wasn't kidding when he said Baricza is punishing himself worse than the force ever would. He has a full understanding of his actions, and he regrets them…He's beating himself up about it. I don't want to grow soft on him, and be the friendly "Everything is going to be ok" type of guy. But at the same time I don't want to seem like I'm heartless."

"I think you're doing all that you can. Your job here isn't to be everyone's friend. You are their boss," Bates pointed out. The captain nodded.

"That's exactly what I needed to hear, Harold…thank you."

"Anytime, Gerald," Bates replied heading for the door.


	5. Chapter 5

On leaving the hospital that morning Jon was too keyed up to go home so he stopped by a Dollar Tree and picked up some cleaning supplies then headed to Ponch's apartment. Truthfully for a bachelor pad Ponch's place was not that bad; especially if you considered the state he kept his RV when he was living in it. Ordinarily Jon refrained from interfering in the way Ponch kept his apartment, after all Ponch is an adult. However, today Jon had a feeling that at the very least Maria Poncherello, Ponch's mother, was coming. If Mama P. was coming, he wanted Ponch's place to have what he thought of as the military shine. Besides cleaning gave him something to focus on other than his worry for his partner. It had taken him nearly four hours of mopping, dusting, polishing, vacuuming, making beds, and putting away junk before Jon was satisfied Ponch's apartment was presentable and headed home.

Jon had just finished eating lunch around one. He wasn't in the mood for eating but finally forced himself to do it. Once he was finished, Jon tiredly fell into bed. He was exhausted but his mind refused to shut down so he could sleep. So instead he just laid there. He was waiting for a phone call from Brackett. He figured as soon as the call came in and he knew when Ponch would be going into surgery then he could head back over to the hospital. Soon his thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the phone ringing. The noise made him jump, startling him at first. He reached for the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey, Jon…its Kell. The tests were successful, we were able to find the source of the bleed and we think we can get to it with minimal damage. We're prepping him for surgery now…" he started.

"Alright, thanks for letting me know," Jon said.

After his very short talk with Brackett, Jon stood up and began walking to the door. As soon as he turned the handle the phone rang again. "Who could that be?" he wondered as went to answer it. As soon as he got out the word 'hello' he was met with someone talking so fast it was hard to tell what was being told to him. Jon laughed slightly just that huge mouth full of words reminded him of how Ponch talked to him when excited. So that narrowed it down easily this was Alfred Poncherello, Ponch's father. Ponch was way too much like his father.

"Hey…Mr. Poncherello, calm down…talk slowly, ok?" Jon replied. The way he responded was the same way he had to talk to Ponch at times.

"Sorry…I'm just a little flustered. Maria and I were coming together…but it was so last minute they only had room for one more passenger on the plane…I'm on my way. Maria said she'd try to get here soon as well. She might just catch a bus to L.A. That alone was annoying. I wanted to be with her…"

"It's alright, Mr. Poncherello…" Jon replied sighing.

"Just call me Alfred," Alfred said. "Anyway…so I'll be there late afternoon. I need a ride…do you think you could pick me up from the airport?"

"Of course I can." Jon assured the flustered man.

Alfred let out a relieved sigh, "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!"

"It's no problem really," assured Jon. "What is your flight number and what time are you expected to land?" he questioned.

"Oh, just a minute let me check," Alfred responded quickly. There was a pause and the sound of someone riffling through a bag. After a few moments Alfred returned to the phone, "If I am reading this ticket correctly I am on United Airline flight 592 from Chicago to Los Angeles. The flight should arrive at 5:53 pm pacific time," he read.

"Ok, Alfred. I will meet you at the gate when you land," Jon assured. He continued, "Let me give you my cell phone number just in case for some reason you can't find me." He paused then questioned, "Do you have a pen and something to write on?" He waited until he received affirmation that Alfred was ready, then begin, "My cell number is 310-222-2345." After once again reassuring Alfred that it was no problem to meet him at the airport Jon ended the call.

As Jon stood by the phone in his kitchen trying to decide whether or not to go to the hospital before going to the airport to pick up Alfred his phone rang again. _"Wow its grand central around here today" he thought._ "On picking up the phone he heard, "Hey, Jon its Joe."

"Oh, hey, Sarge. What's up?" he replied.

"If you're not busy IA needs to take your statement." Joe informed him.

"Sarge, I barely know what happened…I'll do my best though," Jon replied.

Joe sighed. "I know you didn't actually see it, but you might know something we don't."

Jon nodded slightly then told Joe he'd meet him soon. He pulled on his coat and went out the door.

 _Shortly at Central…_

When Jon arrived at the CHP station he went to Joe's office where he figured they'd meet. It just seemed like what would happen. And sure enough as he approached he saw there were two officers from IA waiting in Joe's office with him. Even though the door of Joe's office was open, Jon knocked and waited for acknowledgement, before entering the office and closing the door behind him.

"Hi, sorry it took so long." He said. "I was about out the door when I realized I might be gone a while. Listen I promised Alfred Poncherello that I would meet his flight from Chicago. He should land at 5:53 pm this evening. I need to leave in time to get to the airport."

Getraer nodded. "Hopefully this will not take long. Let me introduce you to the IA officers in charge of Ponch's case." He turned to an attractive young woman standing beside his desk with one hip propped on the edge of his filing cabinet. "This is Senior Detective Kendall Forbes, and standing against the back wall is her partner Detective Justin Lightfoot."

Jon turned to shake hands with the IA officers getting his first good look at the woman as he did so. Jon was startled to realize that he knew the female officer.

"It's been a while, hasn't it Jon?" Kendall questioned with amusement.

"You two know each other?" questioned both Joe and Justin.

Jon and Kendall smiled at the way the two men had blurted the question out simultaneously. Jon answered, "Yeah, we went through the academy together. I guess you could say we were study partners."

"And good friends," Kendall added softly.

Jon whispered in agreement, "Yeah, and good friends."

"Jon," Kendall begin then continued, "I'm sorry about Ponch. He is a good officer. With your help we will determine what went wrong and who is at fault. I promise whoever is at fault will face disciplinary action."

"I know, and I trust you to be fair Kendall. The problem is that everyone on the scene that day is a good friend of mine and Ponch's. No matter what you find a very good friend will be in trouble, and I will feel like a heel," stated Jon.

"I know Jon, and I'm sorry you are in this situation. I hate cases like this because I know there was no malice behind what happened. Not to mention that everyone involved suffers. At least when I am investigating corrupt officers, I'm dealing with criminals who deserves punishment." Kendall replied. She continued, "Well putting this off will not help anyone. I guess we might as well get started. Jon I have to ask you to accompany me to one of the formal interview rooms. We must have your statement recorded, transcribed, and signed."

Joe spoke up, "Room 3 is available Jon. I will let you show them where it is located. Come back by here before you leave ok."

"Sure Sarge," responded Jon, "Kendall, Justin would you follow me, please?"

The group remained silent as they walked through the corridors of the station. Interview/Interrogation room 3 was very basic. There was of course the two way mirror, a steel table bolted to the floor, two steel chairs, and of course the video camera high in the corner of the room out of reach. For the first time in his life, the room gave Jon a vague feeling of unease.

Jon turned to the two IA officers and offered, "I can get another chair from one of the offices."

"That's not necessary Jon," replied Justin, "I can perch on the edge of the table." After everyone made themselves as comfortable as possible.

"I want you to start from the beginning," Kendall said. "From all that you remember can you tell us what happened on the day Officer Poncherello was injured? Remember Jon just the facts."

"Well, I was actually not at the scene when the accident occurred. But I do know some. We were in pursuit of a jewel thief, he also was a man that we'd been after a while, for stealing a CHP motorcycle. Ponch and I were the first people involved in the pursuit and when we came up with a good plan to catch him along with the help of our back up." Jon paused gathering his thoughts.

"You see Ponch and I were chasing the suspect east on Ashe street. As you know Ashe ends in an ally just past Market. The plan Ponch and I worked out was for me to cut over on to Brooklyn Avenue and to where it intersects Market then come up Market to Ashe and block the turn onto Market with my motor. Bear was supposed to come down Market from King Street and block the turn in the other direction. Ponch was to follow the suspect to ensure he didn't have time to turn off and hide. That would leave the suspect no choice but to enter the dead end ally. Once he was in the Ally it would be easy to block the ally leaving him no escape. I had Ponch radio the instructions." Again Jon paused thinking about everything that went through his head as he and Ponch formulated their plan.

"Officer Grossman and Sargent Getraer acknowledged over the radio that they had fallen in behind Ponch and would follow his lead. Others officers acknowledged that they would provide backup from other directions. Officer Baricza, was supposed to back us up by blocking Market Street from the north but he never acknowledged his instructions. Just moments after I reached my spot, Ponch radioed that the suspect was nearing the intersection. I could see Officer Baricza coming up Market Street just as the suspect blew through the intersection. I moved my motor to block the alley and apprehend the suspect." Jon paused yet again remembering how relieved he was to see Bear's Car pulling up, and how he had not thought anything at the time of the fact that Bear had not acknowledged instructions.

"I don't know what happened from the time I moved my motor until I made it back to the intersection. Though shortly after entering the alley I heard the squeal of breaks and then the crunch and grind of an impact. After I apprehended the suspect and turned him over to a vehicle officer, I headed back to the intersection. When I got there, instead of seeing Officer Baricza stopped on Market Street like I expected, his vehicle was stopped blocking Ashe Officer Poncherello's motor was crumpled against it. And my partner was on the other side of the car on the ground injured. He looked so awful…" Jon was having flashbacks of how everything had looked when he arrived. Bear sitting in the car, Grossie angry, Ponch on the ground…Jon shook his head trying to rid himself of these images.

Kendall made a motion to stop recording but changed her mind, turning to Jon and said, "I'm sorry to make you relive such a disturbing experience Jon."

Jon started having nearly forgotten where he was and that his statement was being recorded. With one last shake of his head, he looked up into the sympathetic green eyes watching him with worry. And finished his statement by saying, "Ambulances and paramedics were called and Joe and I tried to do what we could for Ponch until they arrived. Once he was treated by the paramedics I road in with Ponch. That is all I know."

"Thank you, Jon," replied Kendall. "I don't have any questions now, do you Justin?" Kendall questioned.

"No, not now, though something may come up later," Justin answered.

Kendall turned to Jon, "I know that you are taking time off until Officer Poncherello comes around. As the investigation moves forward we may need to ask you to clarify your statement or we may have questions about others statements. If something comes up we will need you to come back in and answer some questions. Until then you are free to come and go as you please. Thank you for your help Officer Baker." Jon quickly left the station.

 _At the airport…_

Jon was waiting for the flight to come in. Alfred called and said it would be arriving soon. Jon waited, he couldn't wait to get back to the hospital though. All that was on his mind was Ponch. He wanted to know how everything was going there. Jon was sitting in a chair by a window staring straight ahead. There were a lot of people crowding around either waiting for the plane to come in, or they were waiting for their own plane. Jon was starting to fall asleep. He hadn't gotten much sleep lately.

Jon had dozed off in the chair and had been sleeping a few minutes when all the sudden he felt something or someone poke him. His eyes opened slightly, and for a second there he thought he saw Ponch. But when he was fully awake he realized that was Alfred. Just as many people had said time after time, Ponch and Alfred looked A LOT alike! Of course Alfred looked much older, because he was older, but just like people had told Jon Alfred does look like Ponch and it wasn't until just now that he really paid attention to that.

"Hey there, Jon you ready to go?" Alfred asked.

 _"Dang it he even sounds like Ponch…"_ Jon thought. "Yeah sure, let's get your stuff dropped off at Ponch's place then we'll go see what's going on down at the hospital.

 _Meanwhile at Ponch's apartment…_

Alfred dropped his bags in the middle of the floor and then went on a quest for some food in the fridge.

"Are you just gonna leave your things there?" Jon asked.

"Oh I'll get that later. I mean…I'm supposed to make myself at home, aren't I?" Alfred replied with a ding dong in his hand.

"Wow…now I see where Ponch gets some of his habits from…" Jon said quietly to himself.

Alfred then joined him in the living room again. He moved his bags up onto the couch. "I'm not sure how long I'm staying but I packed a lot…just in case."

"I noticed," Jon commented while looking at all the stuff.

Alfred didn't notice so much he was looking around the place. He hadn't visited in a while. "Well I guess it's time to go. I wanna know how Frank is doing," Alfred finally said as he came back over.

Jon then led him out the door.

 _Later at the hospital…_

When they arrived at the hospital later, Alfred was greeted by a familiar face. "Hey there, long time no see," Ryan Adams said hugging his old friend.

"Good to see you, Ryan," Alfred replied.

It was awkward at first they hadn't seen each other in a while and this wasn't exactly how they wanted their next get together to be like.


	6. Chapter 6

After greeting his old friend Dr. Adams moved the group into the Doctor's Lounge. He thought about using Dr. Brackett's office as the lounge was not very privet, but was not certain where the other doctor was at the moment. He had tried to dismiss Jon but Alfred had insisted that the young officer join them. Once everyone had a cup of coffee and were sitting around the table Ryan looked at Alfred and asked, "Has Jon told you about Frank's injuries?"

"Not really, except to say that he should be getting out of surgery soon," replied Alfred.

"He was taken back to surgery! When! For what! Why wasn't I informed?" Ryan practically shouted.

"Whoa, Doc calm down. He had an angiogram and a myelogram this morning. Doctor Brackett called me around 1pm and said the tests showed them where the bleed in his brain was, and that Doctor Early and he were prepping Ponch for surgery then," explained Jon.

"Waste of time and money," mumbled Ryan. "Going to end up wasting more time and money on nothing but a vegetable," he continued to mutter having completely missed the look of shock on both Jon and Alfred's faces.

"What do you mean, wasting time and money on a vegetable? What are you talking about?" questioned a very pale and shaking Alfred.

"Oh, I didn't mean for you to hear that Alfred." Ryan apologized. He continued, "Maybe it's better you did though, I don't want you to get your hopes up that Frank will be just fine. Frank has only a 10 percent chance of living and if he lives he has only a 5 percent chance of ever walking or talking. It would be a safe bet that even if Brackett and Early stop the bleed he will remain in a vegetative or near vegetative state his injuries are so severe."

"What exactly are his injuries?" questioned Alfred quietly with tears starting to pool in his eyes.

Ryan thought a moment then said, "Well if I remember correctly, Frank had: a compound fracture of his left femur, a puncture of the left lung which evolved into a tension pneumothorax, a ruptured spleen, a laceration on the caudate lobe of his liver, severe bruising over most of his body, and of course the concussion and bleed in his brain. It also appears that there is swelling of the spinal column in several places."

"That does sound devastating," Alfred agreed before continuing, "But Jon said that Doctor Brackett and Doctor Early found the source of the bleeding in Frank's brain and are operating to fix it. Stopping the bleeding should fix his head and he will be fine right? So why did you say that the surgery was a waste of time and money?"

"Well no, Alfred, the damage already done by the concussion and the bleed will not automatically be undone by stopping the bleeding. Besides he was without adequate oxygen for some time because of the pneumothorax; that caused damage as well. We will not know the extent of the brain damage he has unless he wakes up; but I think it is safe to say that if he does wake up he will not be the same," concluded Ryan.

Alfred glanced at Jon and could tell that he was furious, his hands were clenched, his face was red and there were tears in his eyes. Alfred laid a supportive hand on Jon's shoulder, then looking him in the eyes questioned, "Is that not what Doctor Brackett told you?"

Looking at Alfred Jon replied, "Yeah, essentially; but Kell knows one thing your friend here seems to have forgotten, if he ever knew."

Ryan looked at Jon and scoffed, "Oh yeah, what is that doctor."

Jon whispered a quiet, "I'm sorry," to Alfred then rounding on Ryan he practically shouted, "That YOU ARE NOT GOD!" Realizing how loud he had gotten Jon lowered his voice but continued forcefully, "Your job is to treat people to the best of your ability no matter what you personally think of their prognosis or lifestyle choices. Why on earth did you become a doctor if you care so little for the sanctity of life. Determining who lives and the extent of their recovery is the Lord's responsibility. If you became a doctor because you thought it would be an easy way to make money and impress people then you are in the wrong job."

Before anyone could say another word the door of the lounge opened reveling Doctors Kelly Brackett and Joe Early. Behind them stood nurse Dixie McCall, her hands on her hips ready to launch into a lecture about maintaining peace and quiet in the hospital. At the sight of Jon standing red faced with fist clinched she quickly crossed to him and placing a restraining hand gently on his arm calmly asked him what was wrong. Looking down into Dixie's concern filled eyes Jon took a deep breath. "I'm sorry Dixie. I was just reminding one of your doctors who is ultimately in charge, both in here and out on the streets," he informed her.

"Oh you mean me," Dixie joked with a grin.

"Sorry Dixie, a higher authority than yours," Jon replied with a faint smile.

"Oh, me then," Kell picked up the joke.

Jon looked at him and with a straight face said, "What do you mean Kell, Dixie has more authority than you do. After all she keeps you in line." At Dixie's snort of laughter Jon relented, "Actually Kell, I was referring to the Lord."

"Oh, that ultimate authority," Kell replied with a smile.

Jon, Kell, and Dixie all began to chat. Alfred pulled Ryan aside.

"Ryan, is something wrong? You didn't always used to lay on the doom and gloom to anyone. Everyone always had a chance no matter how small it was, and you'd fight for them. Do you not like my son?" Alfred asked.

Ryan stared at him. "Of course I like your son, Alfred. He's a lot like you, so I hear. I haven't really gotten to talk to him at all, but still…as soon as I saw him I knew it must be someone related to you. He looks a lot like you, Alfred."

"I know he does, only he still looks young," responded Alfred

"That's because he is," Ryan reminded then smiled slightly. Something he hadn't done in a while. "I'm really sorry about my actions, Alfred. Life's been tough lately, and it's getting to me. It's messing with my mind, and causing me to only think the worst. I'm sure Frank will be ok as long as he's still being taken care of by Dr. Brackett. I had to hand this over to him, I was getting too emotionally involved. I've seen too many bad cases lately, Alfred…I think I'm losing it."

"No, you're still pretty much the same guy I remember…except for all the pessimistic views and stuff you gave us. You weren't exactly thinking positive. Want to get a cup of coffee and talk about it?" Alfred asked.

"Just like old times?" Ryan asked curiously.

"Sure, we can go find that old coffee shop by your house and I'll buy."

"I can't leave right now, but we can get coffee here and find a quiet place to talk. I also want to introduce you to my girlfriend later," Ryan said heading for the coffee pot.

Alfred nodded and followed Ryan.

Jon watched wondering how in the world Alfred could put up with someone like that. He didn't feel like it would be polite to ask though, at least not right there in front of Dr. Adams.

"Hey, doc…can I see Ponch?" Jon asked Dr. Brackett hopeful for the answer to be yes. Although Ponch wouldn't be responding to him much in the conversation he had a lot he needed to get out, and the only person that he ever felt like they actually listened to him, was Ponch. He badly wanted to be with his best friend right now. He was hoping that the recovery process would actually go by much more quickly than the doctors were saying. Jon hoped Ponch could just magically get better overnight. Which…unless that was part of God's plan, that they'd all see a miracle it wasn't going to happen. At least not at this point in time, it was just the beginning.

When Alfred and Ryan were as alone as they could get in the small room, Ryan opened up more. It felt good to have his best friend sitting right in front of him when he spoke instead of on the phone which seemed like a million miles away.

"You know, one day when I'm not so stubborn I'll actually have to thank Officer Baker…he really put me in my place. And uh…I guess I just needed to be yelled at today. As soon as he finished I was hit with this overwhelming feeling of knowing how right he is…and how much I'm in need of change. For the past few months I've been in this fog…feels like I'm all alone, and that no one understands me anymore. I even get irritated with Bex, and she's my girlfriend! Lately I've lost a lot of my patients due to their injuries being severe…none as bad as Frank's…so I was in shock that he was still living. Most of my recent patients have been elderly people that were too weak and fragile to even handle having a broken bone…"

"I bet it's nice to get a break from that," sympathized Alfred.

Ryan nodded. "Yeah…but as soon as I saw Frank…" he started a lump forming in his throat. When Alfred was there it was hard to control this emotion as much as he had before he came. "Alfred…he looks so much like you…I thought…well this brought back a terrible memory…" Ryan started. "I knew it wasn't you though, due to the fact he's much younger…but Alfred when you were his age…I'll never forget that day rushing you to the E.R. because of a stupid accident that could've been avoided…" Ryan looked away after slamming his cup down on the table.

Alfred looked at Ryan a sympathetic look in his eyes. "Ryan, it wasn't your fault. Stop blaming yourself. You couldn't have done anything to stop it from happening…and if what's going on now is bringing back those memories and you're starting to get that guilty feeling again I want you to know right now to wipe that thought from your mind. You can't do anything to take back what happened. Just like everyone always says, Frank and I are a lot alike. We look alike, think alike, and often times will find ourselves getting into the same kind of situations. Believe me, it must just be a Poncherello thing…Patti, Robert, and Martin are the same…not nearly as bad, but still. We all find ourselves in some type of mess. That's why some of us as we grow older decided to go into a career that couldn't be that dangerous. Frank on the other hand wanted to become a police officer. His job is very dangerous, but sometimes we all just have to deal with that. If he enjoys it, and is good at it then why take it from him? I just don't want to see him getting killed at such a young age…but none of that is up to me. I'm sure it will take a while to recover, but you know me and my family, we don't just give up that easily…and we'd take any chance we've got of being back to normal again."

"True…Alfred…" Ryan started, pausing to organize his thoughts.

"What's up?" Alfred asked sensing his friend had more to say.

"I…I'm sorry for giving up on him so easily…I guess this job changed me a bit. I've seen so much death that I tend to think a little more negatively than I used to," confessed Ryan.

"But it doesn't have to be that way, Ryan. You can see past all that! I know that jobs like this can change you. And being an officer can change you too…I was terrified to let Frank go into that career…I thought it would change him so much to the point I wouldn't know him anymore…but no…in fact I think it built his character more. Not everyone is like that, and I know you're better than this. You can let go of what happened. Yes you will see death, and you'll also see people pull through. Don't give up on them! Please, I know you better than this, Ryan…don't let this job change you into a grumpy mean doctor. Let it build your character, and create a nice fine doctor like…well kind of like Dr. Brackett."

Ryan laughed. "I'll never be that good, but I get what you're saying."

The lifelong friends were conversing quietly sitting on a sofa somewhat away from the others who were having an entirely different conversation. When Jon had asked to visit Ponch Kell had studied him intensely. He could see from the tense way Jon was standing and holding his arms across his chest that he was still upset. And he knew that Jon needed somewhere quite to pull his emotions together and work through his anger.

"Of course you can Jon. But please explain what has gotten you so upset," Kell requested.

"I'll try Kell," Jon replied with a sigh before continuing, "I really haven't had a chance to tell Alfred everything you told me over the last day or so. By the way I should introduce you Alfred is Ponch's father and he will be here a lot. Anyway Alfred knows Doctor Adams from childhood or something so I let Doctor Adams explain what Ponch has been going through. Since they are friends I thought he would be gentle and explain things the way you did. Instead he just started listing all these injuries, and when he found out that you and Doctor Early had taken Ponch back to surgery to stop the bleeding in his brain…" Jon paused to take a breath and try to stop the tears that were threatening to fall.

"What was his response Jon," questioned Joe gently.

"He… He said… He said that it was a waste of time and money," Jon whispered in a rush.

Dixie, Kell and Joe all got a hard look in their eyes as they glanced over to the corner where Ryan and Alfred were talking. Compassion softened the look to sympathy as they turned back to Jon. Dixie slid under Jon's arm embracing him from the side while Kell placed a hand on his shoulder to provide support. Joe handed Jon a tissue while asking softly, "There's more isn't there?"

Jon just sadly nodded his head. Kell looked at him and encouraged, "Come on out with it. What else did he say?"

"Kell it wasn't exactly what he said so much as the way he said it. You explained that there were no guaranties the surgery would fix everything, and that there might be damage that is irreversible but that Doctor Adams he was talking as if it's guarantied Ponch will be nothing but a vegetable," Jon choked out. He continued, "Where is his faith in the strength of his patients and their families? Where is his compassion? Where is faith in the skills of his fellow doctors? Kell you and Joe have always said you can only do so much and the rest is up to the Lord and the patient. But I have never seen you give up if there is any sign of life. No matter what you think the person's life will be like if they live. And I have never seen you tell family to give up hope. You know that miracles happen every day; we just don't always recognize them as they are happening."

"I don't know Jon," Kell replied, "Not everyone has the same faith in the Lord or their fellow man; but that is no excuse for a lack of compassion. You go on up to Ponch's room. Joe and I will talk to Alfred. We will get him caught up on everything and show him to Ponch's room. Come by my office later and I will fill you in on the surgery and Ponch's treatment plan. I'll also give you something to help you sleep, you look like death warmed over yourself. You haven't slept since before the accident have you?"

"I have tried Kell, I just end up lying awake and well…. You know the closest I have gotten to sleep lately was a few minutes I set with Ponch early this morning. I guess the beep of the heart monitor reassured me he was still with us," Jon confessed.

"Go on, I'll get Ryan to introduce me to Ponch's father," Kell huffed.

"Thanks Kell, and I'm sorry for letting my temper get the better of me," said Jon as he slowly and dejectedly left the lounge.

After watching Jon head down the hall Kell turned and walked over to the two men sitting on the sofa in the corner of the small lounge. The two men looked up as he approached. Kell was startled when a man he had never met but none the less knew looked concerned and asked worriedly, "Is Jon ok, Doctor Brackett?"

"Mr. Poncherello?" Kell questioned before answering.

Alfred nodded and replied, "Yes, but please call me Alfred."

Kell thanked him and assured him, "Jon just needed time to calm down and organize his thoughts. He was planning to introduce us; but I convinced him to go on up and visit Ponch. I'm Kell Brackett. I'm the doctor in charge of Ponch's case. I wanted to take a few minutes to review Ponch's condition with you and go over the treatment plan for the next couple of days. If you have time."

"Of course Doctor Brackett, have you already told Jon?" inquired Alfred.

"No," responded Kell, "He had too much on his mind to process any more right now. I plan on talking to him later. Why don't I pour myself a cup of coffee and get you gentlemen a refill then we can go to my office to talk."

Once everyone was seated in the office, Kell turned to Alfred and said, "Why don't I start at the beginning? If you have questions we will do our best to answer them." Alfred just nodded his agreement.

"Alright," Kell began, "I'm sure Ryan already told you that Ponch has a number of different injuries. I want to start with what was at the time most immediately life threatening, which was the tension pneumothorax, the paramedics Roy Desoto and John Gage were ordered to treat in the field. A pneumothorax is an injury to a lung that allows air to get between the lung and the chest wall. Now this is what Ponch had at first, it was caused by a broken rib puncturing his lung. It made it a little hard for him to breath but was not a critical situation. However, air continued to collect between his lung and his chest wall until the pressure was high enough to keep the blood from returning to his heart. At that time it became a critical situation as there was less blood for the heart to pump to the body and it had to work harder to get it there. Also the blood had less oxygen in it so the brain and other organs had less oxygen to use. It was sort of like he was suffocating even though he was trying to breath. As you know the human body can only last a short time without oxygen that is why Doctor Adams ordered Roy and Johnny to perform a needle decompression. Basically, they inserted a large needle into the pleural space to remove the air. Once we got Ponch here in the hospital we realized that he had internal bleeding so we took him up to surgery. The bleeding was confirmed by an abdominal ultrasound and we rushed him to the operating room for exploratory surgery to find the source of the bleeding and stop it. I was the one performing that portion of the surgery and what I found was that he had ruptured his spleen and had a four inch gash in one lobe of his liver. I had no choice but to remove his spleen. I tried to surgically repair the laceration to the liver but I could not get the bleeding under control, so I had to remove that lobe of the liver. The other thing we did up in surgery was insert a chest tube to continue to drain air and allow the lung to re-inflate. That is known as a thoracotomy, and that tube will need to remain in place for a couple of days. We knew before we took him up to surgery that his leg was broken so an Orthopedic Surgeon met us in surgery. Because the bone came through the skin Ortho cannot put a traditional cast on until the wound heals. So what they have done is place an external fixation device. It is basically a cage around the leg holding the bones in place. It looks a lot like a medieval torture device because there are long pins going from the device into the bone. Now a major complication of breaks like Ponch has is the formation of blood clots near the break. If a clot forms it does one of two things, it stays in the leg causing thrombosis which is swelling, redness, irritation, infection, and cell death; or it breaks off and travels to the lungs which is called a pulmonary embolism, if that happens it is often fatal even in hospitals. So to prevent that from happening we have him on a medicine called Heparin. Heparin's sole purpose is to thin the blood and prevent it from clotting. It was obvious that Ponch hit his head rather hard since his helmet cracked. We were worried that he had a bleed in the brain. Now many times a bleed will be small and the body's natural clotting abilities take care of the problem without doctors having to do anything other than wait. We were hoping that that would be the case here and it almost was, until we had to give Ponch the Heparin. The Heparin broke down the clot in Ponch's brain and the bleed started up again."

Alfred sighed, that was a lot to take in, and he had no questions yet.

At this point Joe took over the explanation, "Alfred my specialty is in neurosurgery and I was concerned about the Heparin causing Ponch's brain to bleed again so I placed an ICP or intracranial pressure monitor before I finished the first seizure happened. I chose to use a Subdural Screw which is hollow screw that is inserted through a hole drilled in the skull. It is placed through the membrane that protects the brain and spinal cord (dura mater). This allows the sensor to record from inside the subdural space. We monitored his condition over nigh and unfortunately his pressure continued to climb. Ideally we would have done an MRI to find the location of the bleed. Unfortunately, with all of the metal in and around his leg and the screw in his head a MRI cannot be used. So this morning we conducted a Myelogram and an Angiogram. For the Myelogram we injected a small amount of a radioactive isotope. Once it was absorbed we were able to map the nerve pathways leading into the brain. That is what told us there is some swelling of the nerves coming from the cervical area, as well as swelling in the lumbar area. For the Angiogram we injected dye into his veins and watched for a leak as it went through his brain. There were actually two small leaks one was located in the Temporal Lobe near the area responsible for recognizing and understanding language. The other was a little larger and was located near the optic chiasm located below the hypothalamus. I was able to insert a micro needle to cauterize the bleeding. And remove some of the excess blood. Right now we are hopeful that Ponch will wake up and be just fine, but there is a chance that some of the damage could take a while to heal or even be permanent."

Alfred remained quiet. He was a little confused, but at the same time didn't know what to ask.

After Joe finished explaining the surgery Kell continued, "Alfred I promise we will do everything we can for Frank. We have had him in a medically induced coma since he came in. We plan to start tapering off those medicines tomorrow. First we will remove the chest tube, we will have to monitor his breathing for a while then we will remove the ventilator. Once he is off the sedation meds completely he should start to wake up. We will make arrangements for you and Jon to stay with Ponch. We do not want him alone when he wakes up. He could be disoriented or there could be some vision disturbances. We don't want him to panic, we think you and Jon will have the best chance of keeping him calm. Once he is awake we will have several tests to conduct before we know the full extent of the damage and how long it will take him to fully recover."

For several minutes after Kell and Joe finished their explanations, there was total silence in the small office. Then Alfred looked up at Kell with tears in his eyes and said, "Jon was right you really go into detail when you provide explanations, and it is a lot to take in. But you know somehow I actually feel better about Frank's chances." Alfred didn't have much to say. He was still processing all this information.

 _In Ponch's room…_

Jon sat there silently for a few minutes, just calming himself down. If Ponch were awake, he would've asked why Jon was so upset. Because of that, Jon wanted to just spill out all this information, whether Ponch heard him or not, or paid any attention.

"Ponch, I can't wait till you're awake. I want you to get better. I want you to be able to prove Dr. Adams wrong! How the heck that guy got a job here beats me. He's a jerk! He doesn't seem to really care about the patients, or anyone anyway, he shouldn't still be here. And how in the world could he be best friends with YOUR dad!? They are like two completely different people…" Jon got that out, and felt a little better. But even then he felt there was more to say.

"Ponch, I don't like what Dr. Adams says about you…he gave up hope a few minutes after you came in. And he says it's all because of the fact he's lost so many people lately…I don't think that's the whole reason behind it. We've seen many deaths, and that doesn't change our thoughts on if someone lives or not! He can't decide that!" As Jon let it all out, he felt better, and even though Ponch wasn't talking to him or anything he could still picture all the facial expressions he'd be getting right now, and even a few words that might've been said to him. As he got all worked up about everything all that went through his mind was that if Ponch were awake, he'd want Jon to calm down. So knowing that much, Jon stopped talking and took a few deep breaths, then let them out.

"I'm sorry, Ponch. I didn't mean to come in here and complain, I was coming here to get my mind off of everything," Jon apologized. He ran his fingers through his hair a bit before continuing. "I…I'm praying for you…and uh you'll get better soon. "

Jon stood up, he'd been in there a while, and he felt like now it was time to leave and get some rest. Everyone knew he needed it. He said goodbye, then walked to Dr. Brackett's office the whole way there he was praying.

"God, please don't take him from me…Please," he begged. "I feel so helpless not being able to do anything for him. All I can do is wait, and hope that what the doctors are doing will help, and pray that you're working with them. I know you are, if you weren't Ponch wouldn't have made it this far. God, please help him get better. I want my best friend back…oh, and while you're working on fixing up my partner, would you mind helping out Dr. Adams? He needs a reality check."

Jon kept thinking and praying, he was so lost in thought that he walked passed Alfred, Joe Early, and Doctor Adams heading up to Ponch's room. The three men saw him but realizing he was preoccupied left him alone. Jon was standing in front of the door to Kell's office before he realized it. He raised his hand to knock then stopped, he really wasn't ready to 'play nice' with Doctor Adams. After a few seconds of internal debating he finally knocked on the door. Hearing come in as acknowledgement Jon opened the door and looked around. Kell was sitting behind his desk with an open medical book, other than Kell the office was empty.

Kell looked up and saw his exhausted friend standing in the doorway with a puzzled almost lost look on his face. "Jon come on in and sit down," Kell ordered kindly.

Jon looked around in bewilderment as he sat down on the comfortable sofa, "Where is everyone," he asked shifting into a more comfortable position.

"Joe and Ryan took Alfred up to Ponch's room a few minutes ago. You should have passed them in the hall," replied Kell.

"Umm. Maybe I did, I don't know," Jon responded his words slurring just slightly.

"Jon, I know you are dead tired and need to sleep, but can you pay attention for a few more minutes? I want to fill you in on the treatment plan for Ponch for the next couple of days," Kell addressed his friend.

Jon sat up a little straighter, "I'm ok for a little while longer Kell,' he answered.

"Alright Jon," Kell agreed continuing, "I promised we would do everything we can for Frank. You know that we have had him in a medically induced coma since he came in. There were two reasons for the chemical coma. At first it was because he could not handle all of the pain. By keeping him unaware of the pain we kept his blood pressure stable. This helped a lot with the swelling both in his brain and along his spine. We plan to start tapering off those medicines tomorrow or the next day. First we will remove the chest tube, we will have to monitor his breathing for a while before we can remove the ventilator. Once he is off the sedation meds completely he should start to wake up. We will make arrangements for you and Alfred to stay with Ponch. We do not want him alone when he wakes up. He could be disoriented or there could be some vision disturbances. We don't want him to panic, we think you and Alfred will have the best chance of keeping him calm. Jon there were two leaks in his brain, a small one near the language processing area. There is a possibility that he will not be able to talk properly because he will not be able to understand the words you are saying. If that happens we expect it to be a temporary problem while the brain recovers from some bruising. You could think of it like a severe concussion. We would have speech therapy work with him and show you how to work with him. The larger more serious bleed was located near the optic chiasm which is located below the hypothalamus. Joe was able to insert a micro needle to cauterize the bleeding, and remove some of the excess blood. It is possible that there is some damage to the optic nerves if the clot put too much pressure in them or if they could not get enough blood then Ponch could wake up blind or nearly blind. Hopefully the damage would be temporary but the chances are high that it would be permanent. Once he is awake we will have several tests to conduct before we know the full extent of the damage and how long it will take him to fully recover. I know that is a lot of information to take in when you are exhausted. Sleep on it and we can talk tomorrow."

Kell paused then addressed Jon again, "I was planning to let you go home and take a light dose of a sleeping pill once you got home. But Jon you are so exhausted I don't think it is safe for you to drive. I want you to sleep here in my office on the sofa. It is fairly comfortable. I know because I sometimes use it myself after hard cases. I promise no one will disturb you until I come in tomorrow."

"Ok, Kell if you don't mind I will sleep here. I think you are right about it being a bad idea for me to drive now," Jon accepted.

"Jon you are so tired you shouldn't need too much help to fall asleep. I have a 10 mg Ambien here I am going to break it in half and give you five mg. It is Dixie's night to work third shift, I will leave the other half with her. She will check on you in a couple of hours if you are not asleep she will give you the other half," stated Kell.

"Ok responded Jon as he swallowed the half a pill and stretched out on the sofa getting comfortable.

Kell draped a light throw over Jon and left his office. Before he was completely out the door he could hear light snores and snuffles telling him Jon was out for the night.


	7. Chapter 7

Bear woke up and rolled over, he didn't feel like getting up today. He knew he had an interview with IA later that he needed to get ready for. Then he'd be right back to the front desk. He couldn't wait for Ponch to wake up. Every single day, waking up Bear wished that he could wake up knowing Ponch was awake and getting better. He would try to visit later if he could.

Bear made his way through the apartment getting ready, and cleaning it at the same time, and soon he was out the door. He went to the station, he was supposed to meet Kendall and Justin he saw them going into interview room two with Grossie, and by the way Grossie had looked back and glared at Bear, he knew that Grossie was still upset with him.

Kendall looked over at Grossie as he entered the interview room, "Officer Grossman have a seat I just need to slip next-door to get my notes and then we can start if that is ok with you," she stated.

"Oh, sure, that's fine with me," replied Grossie.

Kendall slipped into Interview room three which they had taken over as an office for the duration of their investigation. She picked up her notebook and headed back to Interview room two. In the hall she noticed that Bear had chosen to sit in a chair in the hallway to wait for his interview. She stopped and took a good look at him, which was easy since he wasn't paying attention to his surroundings. She tried to come up with a way to describe the man before her, haggard was the only thing she came up with. He had dark bags under his eyes, indicating a lack of sleep, and his shoulders were slouched as if he had the weight of the world on them. She could tell, even from down the hall, that the gossip mill was right this time; Officer Barry Baricza had convicted himself and the judgment he passed was harsher than any court would ever inflict. She turned and continued to interview room two with a sigh, no matter what her findings or recommendations no one was coming out of this without some pain. "I apologize for taking so long," she addressed the room as she entered, continuing, "Shall we get started gentlemen? Officer Grossman would you like something to drink?"

"I'm fine," Grossie replied.

"Ok, then," Kendall begin, continuing, "Officer Grossman, it is my duty to inform you that our conversation will be recorded. Officer Grossman, please tell me what happened from your perspective the day that Officer Poncherello was injured. You may begin at the point you heard of the pursuit. And please only the facts as you know them."

"Uh… Yes Ma'am, Uh you can call me Grossie, uh if you want Ma'am," Grossie stuttered.

"Thank you Officer Grossman. Please continue," Kendall replied.

Justin observed his partner, she was taking a hard line on this interview and he wasn't sure yet why. He wouldn't say anything yet, but he wouldn't let her derail the investigation or railroad an innocent Officer either.

Grossie oblivious to the look Justin shot Kendall continued, "Around 2:30 pm Seven Mary three and four, um, that's Officers Baker and Poncherello, radioed in; in pursuit of a suspected jewel thief. We had been trying to nail this guy for a couple of months, because he always road a striped down CHP motor that he stole several months prior. Anyway they radioed in, in pursuit, then a few minutes later Ponch, uh that is Mary four radioed that they knew where the guy was headed and requested back up. He instructed Seven David, ah that is Officer Baricza to approach Ashe on Market from King. He was very clear that he wanted Seven David to block market, and that Jon, um Seven Mary three would block Market from the other direction. The plan was to force the suspect into the dead end alley that Ashe becomes just after Market Street."

Justin was curious so he asked, "Officer Grossman, what would have made them think that the suspect would try to turn on to Market Street?"

"Oh it was obvious, you see the streets in that area, very few of them actually go anywhere, and most of them end in dead ends of one form or another. They had already passed Columbia Avenue which goes to Pacific Highway. For the suspect to go anywhere he would have to turn right on Market Street, it is the last road that leads to a Highway. Jon was the one actually blocking the direction to the highway, Bear was to block the other direction to bring the chase to an end."

"Wait, you got all of that just from a request for Seven David to block Market Street from the north?" questioned Justin in amazement.

"Well yeah," admitted Grossie, all CHP officers would, we know our streets. We have to, our lives depend on knowing how to end chases in the safest way possible. Seven Mary Three and Four's plan was good. It should have been a cake walk, ending in an arrest with no injuries."

"Ok, Officer Grossman, can we please get back to the actual events? What happened after Officer Poncherello radioed in the request for backup and for Officer Baricza to block Market Street?" questioned Kendall.

"Oh," replied Grossie, "Seven Mary"

"Officer Grossman, please just use names, we have a record of everyone's call sign designation," interrupted Kendall.

"Oh, sorry. Anyway," Grossie continued, "Ponch radioed Jon that the suspect was headed his way. Jon responded in affirmative indicating he understood and was ready. By that point Sarge and I had caught up to Ponch. We radioed our position and indicated that we would follow Ponch's lead and provide backup. A few other officers who were further away also radioed that they were on the way to provide backup."

Kendall interrupted, "Did Officer Baricza radio in?"

"If he did, I did not hear him," Grossie answered her.

"Ok, please continue," Kendall requested.

"Yes Ma'am," replied Grossie, "As I was saying, Sarge and I were behind Ponch, as he approached the intersection Ponch looked back. Sarge and I could see Bear's patrol car just pulling up to the intersection. We thought he was stopping to block Market, but then he just kept pulling forward. Sarge shouted to Ponch, trying to warn him but I don't know if Ponch heard or not. He looked forward but by then it was too late for him to turn or stop. I did see his break lights like he was trying to slow but he was so close that there just wasn't time for him to slow much. He plowed into the patrol car going at least 50 mph. He flipped over his handle bars, tumbled over the hood of the car and landed on the other side. The entire front end of his motor was crumpled like a soda can. It was awful."

"Thank you Officer Grossman. I just have a few questions and then we'll be done," Kendall stated. She continued, "Were any of you running your sirens?"

"Yes Ma'am, being in pursuit Ponch, Sarge and I, all had our Lights and sirens going," answered Grossie.

"Ok, will you please tell me what happened after the collision," requested Kendall.

"Well Sarge and I stopped to check on Ponch, of course," answered Grossie with a frown of confusion.

"Walk me through what happened once you stopped," requested Kendall. Justin looked at her and frowned, he wasn't sure where she was going with this. Kendall caught his look and raised her eyebrows in a signal to wait and give her some room to work. He nodded his compliance but his frown told her he did not like being kept in the dark. Grossie was oblivious to the entire exchange between the partners.

"Sarge went over to check Ponch. Bear started to go over there but Sarge told him to stay back. I said something about how he had already done enough. He took exception to that and we argued a little," Grossie responded.

"And then," prompted Kendall.

"Sarge shouted at us to break it up, and then reminded me to call an ambulance," Grossie reluctantly admitted.

"You hadn't already called one?" Justin broke in with surprise.

"No, I hadn't thought about it," Grossie admitted with shame.

"I see, what happened next?" Kendall questioned.

Dejected, Grossie continued, "We heard Jon radio that he caught the suspect and was waiting on a patrol car. Sarge asked for an emergency blanket and then after a few minutes Jon came to check on Ponch. Jon helped Sarge with first aid then rode with Ponch to the hospital once the paramedics were ready to transport."

"Huh, at any point did you or Sergeant Getraer mention checking on Officer Baker to see if he needed backup?" Kendall pressed.

"Ah, no Ma'am," answered Grossie puzzlement.

Justin looked at his partner's frowning countenance, and suddenly it hit him, _"That's what this line of questioning was about and why she was boiling mad."_

Ignoring Justin's expression Kendall continued to push, "So for all you knew, until Officer Baker radioed in, the suspect could have over powered Officer Baker and slipped by to escape in all of the confusion. For all you know Officer Baker could have been injured while apprehending the suspect. Did you ever ask Officer Baker how things went or if he was injured?"

Grossie looked up at Kendall in horror, "Oh, no we were so concerned about Ponch, we ignored Jon. We're lucky the suspect didn't have a weapon."

"That's interesting, I thought the charge was armed robbery," stated Kendall. She looked at Justin, and said, "I must have been absent the day we covered armed robbery at the Academy. Remind me what is the definition of armed robbery."

Justin smiled and said, "A person commits armed robbery when he or she takes something from someone else using violence or intimidation, while carrying a dangerous weapon. Though technically the charge is aggravated robbery, with use of a dangerous weapon."

Grossie looked from one to the other, "I messed up. Oh brother did I mess up. When Ponch wakes up and finds out we left Jon without backup we'll never hear the end of it. I mean assuming he wakes up and knows who everyone is and things. Not that I think he won't be fine…I mean… Oh never mind you know what I mean," he stammered flustered.

"Just a few more questions Officer Grossman if you please," said Justin having caught Kendall's signal to take over the questioning.

"Yes Sir?" questioned Grossie.

"Does Officer Baricza gamble?"Justin asked.

"What, well we all do. You know the type of bets that run around offices. Will Jon win his rodeo, how long until Ponch wrecks another bike…um what will Kim's baby be that sort of thing, "replied Grossie.

"Um, I see. Do you know if he has had money problems recently, ah the last 6 months or so," pursued Justin.

"Well no, he hasn't said anything to me about money problems," answered Grossie.

"Umhum, I don't have any other questions right now, do you Kendall?" said Justin.

"No," said Kendall, then addressing Grossie she continued, "That is all for now Officer Grossman. Thank you for your cooperation. If we have further questions we will contact you. Oh, please don't talk about anything we discussed, we still have more interviews to conduct."

"I understand," Grossie assured her as he walked to the door.

Bear sat and stared at the wall, lost in thought. Remembering back to that day, knowing he was going to be asked a ton of questions about it again. He was starting to hate this. "If only I could go back in time and fix that mistake…" he told himself quietly. "Ponch shouldn't be in the hospital…if anyone deserves that it's me! Why does he have to be the one that got hurt? What if I…I could've killed him that day…" Bear was talking to himself. "He's suffering a lot…he could've been dead, but why didn't he die? I'm glad he didn't…but I mean…God why?" Bear suddenly shifted his conversation with himself to talking to the Lord. He looked up at the ceiling. "Why would you let him suffer like that? Can't you just take away all the pain in the blink of an eye and heal him? And if you can…why haven't you!? We've spent countless hours praying, and the doctors have spent a lot of time trying to help him….you haven't healed him yet! Why are you doing that to him? Why are you making him suffer? Him being in there still not awake…when he wakes up he'll be in pain…he's not going to be quite himself for a while…" Bear stopped for a second, his hands starting to grow shaky from his anger. "God I can't take this anymore! I can't live with myself knowing that I'm the one that caused this! All because I got in a stupid argument with Sindy over who got to talk to Ponch."

Bear had been asked by Getraer to tell Ponch that he couldn't have that vacation time he'd asked for. Ponch was already out on patrol, and Bear would be seeing him soon, so Getraer figured Bear could pass on the info. Bear didn't want to upset Ponch so he asked Sindy to do it. Sindy told Bear that it was childish for him to not want to tell Ponch with the thought not wanting to upset him…and they had a bit of an argument over that.

Well from the looks of it now Ponch was getting that time off…though it wasn't for that vacation he had wanted. And now Bear felt even worse. He couldn't even joke about that.

After nearly an hour, he saw Grossie exit the interview room. He looked at Bear. He noticed how upset his friend looked, and even though Grossie was ticked off still he softened a bit. Realizing Bear was being harder on himself than anyone else was. "Hey, listen it's not that bad in there. They IA people are very nice," Grossie assured him.

Bear nodded and got up. He walked into the room. Kendall and Justin greeted him warmly then asked him to have a seat. Bear sat down, and cleared his throat.

Kendall reminded him that they'd have the whole investigation recorded like all the others had been. Bear just nodded his head wishing this could be over with already. Like he had said in outside of the room he wanted everything back to normal.

This time instead of Kendall leading Justin took over, since Kendall was still a little upset from the last meeting.

"Alright, from the top let's hear it, everything that went on the day of the accident…" Justin said.

"Well, I heard all the sirens, and all the orders being told to us from the radios. It must've slipped my mind that I didn't respond…"

"Must've? Or did it?" Justin asked.

"It did, sorry," Bear replied already feeling embarrassed.

"It's fine, keep going, Officer Baricza."

"Well I turned were I was told to be, and I for sure thought that I was doing the right thing. I wasn't radioing in anything because everyone was so focused on catching the guy I didn't think of it, and my mind wasn't fully with it."

"Where was your mind?" Justin question.

"I was still stuck back at the conversation at Taco Bell with Sindy…" Bear replied.

"Ok, keep going with accident, then I want to hear about what happened between you and Sindy," Justin told him.

Bear cringed regretting that he had to bring her into this. "Well I pull into the street…I thought I saw the guy, so I told myself I was gonna get lots of credit for catching him. Well apparently he'd passed already…suddenly I heard a lot of yelling and the sound of a collision and I knew I hit something, or something hit me. I got out of my car still thinking that I caught the guy…but when I got out…" Bear stopped talking his body was starting to tremble as memories flooded his mind the words that had been said to him, the images that he'd seen…how awful Ponch had looked. "I thought I killed him…" Bear said softly. "And I still don't understand…"

Justin not wanting to go all soft on him decided to switch over to the topic of Sindy. Bear's side of the accident scene was pretty well matching up with what everyone else had been saying. "So, what was it that you and Sindy argued about?" Justin asked.

"Well…oddly enough our argument was about…Ponch…" Bear said.

This time Kendall's eyes were wide in amazement.

"What about him?" Kendall asked coming closer. Justin gave her the look of don't take over. So she backed off a bit, but not enough that she still wasn't going to ask.

"Well, he asked Getraer for some vacation time…he ended up not being able to get it. Sarge knew I was gonna be seeing him so he asked if I'd tell him. I didn't want to give him the news…I asked Sindy to do it. She said I was acting childish…" Bear stated.

"Why's that?" Justin inquired.

"Because I just didn't want to upset him…and she said that if I was worried about something like that then I wasn't going to get far in life. It was childish to worry over hurting someone's feelings, I guess…"

"Is Ponch a sensitive person?" Justin asked.

"Kind of…it depends on the day, or what you're telling him."

There was a pause of silence then Bear spoke again. "I realized later that she was right, because normally if one of us has to break the news about something like that to a fellow officer we do it no problem. So I was I guess being a little silly and childish like she says…but Ponch can be really sensitive…" Bear said.

"I see," Justin said then looked at Kendall.

"Alright, one more thing we need to talk about, Officer Baricza, do you do any gambling?"

"No," Bear replied looking confused.

"Why did you borrow 10,000 dollars from Officer Poncherello?"

"Huh?" Bear asked. "Oh wait, Ponch helped me with money for the ring I bought for Sindy. I was planning on asking her to marry me soon," Bear replied.

"Have you paid any of the money back to him yet?"

"No, but I plan on it when I get the chance. It's not easy to come up with 10,000 dollars I was lucky that he was able to help me," Bear said.

"By any chance was this accident on purpose?"

"What?" Bear asked in shock.

"Like you said 10,000 dollars is hard to pay back, so wouldn't it be easier on you if you didn't have to pay it back. So if you had just the right moment to get rid of Officer Poncherello…" Justin started.

"No! I would never! This was an accident. Believe me I don't want Ponch dead at all. I'm working hard to get that money back to him. I would never kill him because of money," Bear said.

Kendall and Justin looked at each other.

"Alrighty," Justin said while shutting off the recording.

 _Meanwhile at Ponch's apartment_

Alfred woke up and smiled he walked to the kitchen and started to get his breakfast. As he made his breakfast he checked his phone. He saw that he had gotten a text from Maria, she said that she would be coming in a few days as long as the storm was gone like it was supposed to.

Alfred smiled. He was about to text Jon, but remembered that he had slept at the hospital, so he figured he'd just pop by Dr. Brackett's office to say hi when he got there.

So he made breakfast, then left. On his way to the hospital he just drove Ponch's car. He loved Ponch's car, and he liked the Michael Jackson Invincible CD that was left in the CD player. He listened to that on the way there. It took his mind off the worries in his mind for a while, so he could be happier by the time he got to the hospital knowing he'd spend most the day there, and if all went well he'd be spending a lot more time there because Ponch would be awake soon.

When Alfred arrived to the hospital he was greeted by Roy and Johnny.

"Hey, guys," he said cheerfully.

"Hi, Mr. Poncherello. Sleep well last night?" Roy asked.

"Actually yes I did," he replied.

"Well that's good. I hear pretty soon Ponch'll be awake again," Johnny said.

"Yep, I'm looking forward to him getting better. I miss him," Alfred replied.

Alfred, Johnny, and Roy talked for a bit, then Roy and Johnny had to leave. When they left Alfred walked off to go say hi to Jon.


	8. Chapter 8

Alfred waited around a bit, thinking maybe if Jon were up he'd come find him and say hi. When nothing like that happened he ended up deciding to go find Jon. He asked Dr. Brackett where Jon was, and when he was told Jon had slept in Kell's office he decided that was probably where he was still. So he went there. When he came he found Jon on the couch.

Alfred smiled, "You don't intend to sleep all day do you?" he teased in a way that only a Poncherello would.

In response to this he got a slight grunt from Jon as Jon started to roll over. He yawned. "Is it morning already? Seems like the night went by too fast," he said with yawns in between.

Alfred nodded. "Indeed it did, come on let's get you up so we can go see Frank. I talked to Brackett today, they are gonna remove the chest tube, and slowly reduce the amount of sedation meds," Alfred said as he watched Jon sit up.

"When?" Jon asked.

"I don't know, sometime today I think. He never gave me exact times."

Jon nodded as he stretched out his aching muscles sleeping on the couch wasn't exactly the most comfortable place for him. And what no one knew was that before he had caught the jewel thief he had taken a bit of a spill and injured his right shoulder. Nothing too serious, but it hurt, then just like Kendall had suspected the guy did come at Jon with a weapon. He had a few small abrasions on his left side. He hadn't paid much attention to them, but he was just starting to realize now that if Ponch was waking up soon he needed to make sure that he had his injuries taken care of so Ponch had nothing to worry about.

"Well, I guess it's time for breakfast," Jon said standing up.

"I brought a doughnut…I wasn't sure what kind was your favorite, but I know Frank really liked glazed doughnuts when he was a kid," Alfred said as he handed Jon a small box with a couple glazed doughnuts.

Jon smiled. "Thanks," he replied taking it. Who says no to a free doughnut?

Alfred and Jon made small talk in the office while Jon had his breakfast, Alfred talked a lot about what he'd been up to back in Chicago, and how much he wished Ponch would come out and work for him. But he finally admitted that he knew it wasn't ever going to happen.

Jon smiled and began to tell Alfred all about everything that he and Ponch had been up to before the accident, and then he told him all about the nurses in the ICU that he had met. He told him which one he liked, and which one he thought Ponch would like.

Alfred had to laugh at that, remembering back when he and his best friend Ryan were falling in love with all the ladies.

oOoOo

Jon and Alfred both sat in Ponch's room together silently. They had been chatting back and forth occasionally, but not much they were both lost in their own thoughts on how they couldn't wait for Ponch to be awake again…yet they didn't want anything to be wrong with him anymore. They just wanted him to be better already.

Alfred kept looking around the room, it was a beige color, and kind of boring…no pictures on the wall, no TV to watch…there were a few magazines, but the room was mostly a table, a small couch, a chair, the bed, and some machines. The room was very clean too, compared to most rooms Alfred had been in. He'd seen many rooms that were just trashy, not here but other places. There would be band-aid wrappers on the floor, tissues, and random papers. Just scattered junk all over the floor that didn't make you feel like you were in such a clean environment. Here was just spotless though, not even a speck of dust.

Jon looked at Alfred wondering what was going on in his mind. He just wished that something would happen soon. After what had seemed like hours, Brandi and Nikki, Ponch's nurses walked in to check on him.

Jon smiled when he saw them. Then looked at Alfred with a look in his eyes that said, 'that's them'

"Hi, girls," Jon said somewhat cheerfully.

"Hello, Jon," Brandi said smiling brightly at him.

"Hi, Jon…and hello Mr. Poncherello I assume," Nikki said.

Alfred nodded. "Yes," he replied.

She smiled. "Well the doctor will be in soon, so you two should probably leave."

"What's going on?" Jon asked.

"I thought you knew already? We're removing the chest tube today," Brandi said with a smile.

Jon sighed in relief. He thought something bad was going on. He and Alfred did leave the room as asked though.

oOoOo

Dr. Brackett stood at the bed side, Brandi and Nikki nearby ready to help when needed. Kell had just put on some plastic gloves. He set out all he needed some pre-cut tape so that he could get the bandage and gauze taped on as fast as he could as soon as the chest tube was out.

Everything was going to go by so fast as soon as Kell started it always seemed to. Kell looked at the girls making sure they were ready to help him if he needed them to.

As soon as he cut the stitch everything else was a blurry to the girls. It went by fast, they pulled out the tube and placed the bandage on him fast.

Nikki smiled. "We did it," she said giving Brandi a high five. They actually didn't do anything. Brackett did it all himself.

Kell looked at the two sisters and just rolled his eyes and shook his head. He went over to take off his gloves then go off to wash his hands, while the two cleaned up the mess.

While they were busy with that Kell went off to go talk to Jon and Alfred.

Alfred was in the middle of reading a magazine and didn't notice that Kell had walked into the room. Jon however did see him walk in, Jon hadn't been able to sit still since they left the room. Kell tried to bite back a smile seeing how fidgety Jon was and then seeing how fast he'd hopped up excited to see him. No one ever got that excited to see him these days…at least not like that.

"So?" Jon asked rocking back and forth on his heels.

"Jon, he's doing just fine. We'll start slowly reducing the sedation meds as soon as we can. He seems to be working well with us despite the severity of his condition…I mean there haven't been any new complications setting in."

Jon nodded and was relieved for that. "Can we go back in?" he asked.

"Of course," Kell replied.

oOoOo

Alfred had fallen asleep hours later, and Jon was still sitting there beside Ponch's bed. It was hard for Jon to even think about falling asleep he had many other things on his mind and sleep wasn't one of them. He was glad that Alfred was able to sleep though.

Jon had spent the first hour of that time reading, he was reading 'The Wizard of Oz' out loud to Ponch.

After a while he just set the book aside and yawned. Sure he was tired, but was he ready to sleep? No.

Jon smiled. "So, uh Ponch…they uh…they started slowly reducing your sedation meds today…it's exciting I can't wait till you wake up." Jon paused and bit his lip what was it he was trying to say… "Um…I think your mom will be here in a few days. Her flight was delayed due to weather conditions, but she's doing everything she can to get out here."

Jon looked over to the chair beside him, Alfred was leaning back with his head against the wall, fast asleep.

Without Jon even doing anything Alfred started to wake up though. Apparently he felt this need to be awake. As soon as his eyes fluttered open he began apologizing profusely for falling asleep in the first place.

"No, no it's fine. I just took that time to read to Ponch…and uh talk to him a bit too," Jon said though he had run out of things to say at this point. He wanted Ponch to be replying to him it was hard to talk to his best friend and never receive an answer.

Before Alfred could say a word the door opened up, Brandi and Nikki entered the room. "Um, Mr. Poncherello…if you don't mind Dr. Adams was wondering if you'd join him for coffee," Nikki informed.

Alfred just smiled. "I could use a good cup of coffee," he stated as he stood up.

Brandi was already over to the bed checking Ponch's vitals like they'd come in to do in the first place.

As soon as Alfred left the room Brandi let out a sigh. "Things are going really slow here, I'd invite you for some coffee…but I'm sure you just want to stay here with your friend," she said looking at Jon.

Jon just nodded slightly. "I'd love to have coffee with you if you want to have your break in here," he suggested.

Brandi looked at Nikki. "It's not too bad of an idea, Brandi…I'll be helping Amber if you need me," she said then walked off.

Brandi smiled. "Ok, I'll go get us some coffee."

 _Meanwhile in the doctor's longue._

The room was quiet, and peaceful, there was an orange couch that looked like it belonged in the seventies sitting on the left side and beside it was a flat screen TV that quietly played the news in the background. On the right side of the room was a counter and a sink. The counter top was what held the coffee pot, and above that the coffee cups were kept in a cupboard.

Ryan and Alfred sat at a table in the middle of the room on comfortable orange seats, as they chit chatted with each other.

"So, how is he?" Ryan asked.

"He's doing well. They removed the chest tube earlier today, Jon and I have been with him ever since."

Ryan nodded as he stared down into his cup of coffee.

"I really do believe he's going to be ok," Alfred went on.

Ryan nodded slightly thinking that over. "Well maybe you're right."

"I want to give him every chance I possibly can give, and lately all I can sense is a good feeling that he's going to be just fine."

It took a lot to keep Ryan from saying what had formed in his mind, but he knew it would only upset his friend. Ryan was slowly starting to come to the other side, slowly starting to believe Ponch would be fine…but he still had his doubts.

Alfred set his cup of coffee down now and smiled. "Well I feel a lot better after that, I could stay awake a million hours," he said. Then his phone began to ring. "Sorry will you excuse me for a second?" he said as he saw the caller ID said 'Maria' it was his wife, Ponch's mother.

Ryan nodded as he watched Alfred get up and walk out of the room to another spot for more privacy to talk alone with her.

"Well, let's just hope you're right, Alfred…let's just hope that as you keep thinking…your son is going to be alright," Ryan said quietly. He looked down at the table. "I don't want to lose another patient…I don't want to lose someone that I was the doctor that was working with his mom the night he came into this world…I don't want to lose someone so much like…so much like a young exact copy of his father." Ryan laid his head down on the table and tried to fight whatever this emotion was he was feeling inside right now…and he knew for sure he was breaking a rule…a number one rule…don't get emotionally involved with the patient. That was why Bex had forced him to step back from this one… even though he wasn't supposed to be doing this…Ryan still felt the need to be a part of whatever happened with Officer Frank Poncherello.


	9. Chapter 9

_A/N:Thank you Divawannabe24 for fixing my grammar mistakes and making suggestions, you are amazing! :D and to everyone else, I'm so happy to finally have a new chapter out!_

Brandi sat in a chair beside Jon. The room was quiet, just the rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor.

"So, uh Jon," Brandi started clearing her throat. "You two close friends, family, or what?" she asked.

"He's my partner at work…he's my best friend…and he's like a brother to me," Jon replied. He didn't take his eyes off his partner. Still in a coma, but slowly he was going to be waking up. He still was very weak, and injured. It would be a long recovery, but Jon was ready to be there for him.

Brandi smiled at him. "You know, my sister thinks he's kinda cute," she admitted.

Jon laughed. "Is that so?" he finally turned his attention to the beautiful red head nurse sitting beside him.

"Yeah, she can't wait for him to wake up."

"I know how she feels," Jon replied.

"So…" Brandi started.

"Yes?" Jon answered her rather harshly.

"What do you like to do? I mean you've been focusing so much on him you haven't had time for yourself…and uh…I never got a chance to actually get to know you besides your name and see that smile of yours," she said as she felt her cheeks beginning to blush.

Jon smiled and looked down at the floor. "I don't know what you want to know. There's not much to tell, I'm just the normal average everyday guy."

Brandi stared at him. "There's more to it than that, Jon…" She was about to press him for more information when the door opened up.

"Brandi, can you come help us with a patient?" Nikki asked.

Brandi looked at Jon, then at her coffee, then back to the look of desperation in her sister's eyes. "Yeah…sure."

As Brandi left the room Alfred came back in, they accidentally ran into each other.

"Oh, sorry," Alfred said stepping to the side.

Brandi just nodded slightly and tucked a strand of loose hair behind her ear then exited the room.

Alfred turned to Jon. "Is she normally like that?"

"No…I don't know what her problem is," Jon replied honestly.

Alfred sighed then sat down heavily in his seat. He sighed again. "Well I'll stay with Frank if you need to do anything," he said.

Jon thought about it for a few moments and finally decided that he should go see Dr. Brackett and get checked out to make sure he was ok. When Ponch woke up he wanted to make sure he had already been taken care of so Ponch had nothing to worry about.

Jon stood and stretched before he finally spoke up. "I'm going to go talk to Kel," he said. He wasn't going to admit to Alfred he was injured. Alfred might freak out about it. Instead he made it seem like he just wanted to go chat with the doctor about when Ponch might be waking up.

Alfred moved to Jon's chair when he left. Jon's chair was closer to Ponch's bed, so he wanted to sit there if he could. The room was so quiet, and to Alfred it brought a few chills through his body. A window had been slightly propped open for fresh air.

Alfred knew he shouldn't be as worried as he was, and the fact the room was cold just made him worry more. What if Ponch got too cold? Well there was a solution to that problem right away, Ponch had a blanket.

Once again Alfred felt a cold chill run through him. Why was he so worried? He just had this weird feeling that something was going to happen tonight…

 _Meanwhile in Kel's office:_

Kel was sitting at his desk, a cup of coffee in front of him, his phone on the right side of him, and big bowl of mint Oreo ice cream in front of him. He was on break for a few minutes and decided to have a bowl of ice cream, he deserved it…and he loved ice cream. He'd never admit he hid in his office sometimes with a bowl of ice cream…but there were times when he needed to get away and indulge in his favorite snack.

Soon he heard a knock on the door. For the first time ever he'd been caught on an ice cream break. Not that he took them often, just once every few months.

Kel took the last bite and swallowed before saying, "Come in!"

The door opened and in walked Jon. Jon looked exhausted. He forced a smile though. "Sorry, am I interrupting something?" he asked.

Kel then noticed Pandora was still playing on his phone, just classical music for him to relax while he enjoyed coffee and ice cream. Kel turned off the music.

"Sorry about that," he said instantly going back to his normal professional self.

"No, no it's fine. I like to see the nonprofessional side of Kelly Brackett. So what was that classical music? And is that a finished bowl of ice cream?" Jon asked as he made sure to close the door.

Kel nodded. "Yeah, I admit it's a guilty pleasure of mine. Every once in a while on a stressful day or on the best days I have to break out a bowl of ice cream. That information doesn't leave this room."

"I don't know…" Jon started.

"If you tell anyone, I know how to shut down your entire body and I could do it during your next surgery."

"Is that a threat, doctor?" Jon asked a hint of playfulness in his voice and in his eyes.

"Possibly," Kel replied as he placed his hands behind his head interlocking the fingers, and then leaned back in his seat.

Jon laughed slightly "Well alright then I won't say a word."

Kel forced a small smile. "What are you here for Jon?" he knew Jon came for a reason.

Suddenly Jon's smile disappeared. "Oh…uh do you think maybe you could give me a bit of a check-up? I took a small spill when catching the jewel thief the other day then had a run in with his knife. I've been ignoring it because Ponch is more important to me…but now it's extremely important I get taken care of before he wakes up so he has nothing to be concerned about."

Kel nodded. "Alright let's get you into a treatment room."

They walked in silence to the treatment room, Kel dreading the fact Jon caught him during his break, and Jon just worried in general.

The halls were quiet, there was a janitor mopping up a coffee spill and other than that it was dead. The waiting room was very empty as well, most of the patients had been treated and either sent home or kept for overnight observation. It was a slow day, the kind of day Kel liked, yet dreaded at the same time.

With how crazy it could get a slow day often scared him, not that he'd admit to it. His worries always were set aside when he put on his white doctors coat. The only thing he ever worried about was the patient he was treating after that nothing else mattered…at least that's the way he liked to make it seem.

Kel led Jon into treatment room four. A small room, with a bed for him to sit on or lay on while he was being examined, a cabinet on the far left wall with medical supplies such as: band-aids, ace bandage wraps, and pain relievers. Then a small counter and sink for the doctor to wash up, and a phone on the far right wall…and everything else he would need.

Jon sat on the bed.

Kel began to examine him. "What exactly is it I'm looking for, Jon? You know what hurts and what doesn't, I don't want to waste time trying to figure it out," Brackett asked.

Jon nodded. "My shoulder is a little sore…and then I have a few scrapes on my left side…"

"Can you take off your shirt for me?" Kel asked.

Jon slowly took his shirt off. Normally he would've been comfortable with it off, but for some reason when someone was looking at him even if it was a doctor it made him uneasy.

"Relax, Jon," Kel said, not even looking up from what he was doing. Kel was very focused. "Ok, I can put something over that for you so your shirt stops rubbing against it, after that there's not much I can do for it. It should heal rather quickly, it looks more sore than anything else."

Jon nodded in agreement. His left side ached, but for some reason after Kel was finished with it he felt a lot better.

"Now your shoulder." Kel could see a few distinct characteristics of a dislocated shoulder. He examined Jon a little more and that was what he concluded. "It's a dislocated shoulder Jon, if you would've come to me sooner this would be a whole lot less painful, but I need to get it back in place. After it's in place some of the swelling should go down. I'll put you in a sling and you can take some pain killers, and then you need to rest and ice that shoulder, ok?"

Jon nodded.

As Kel began to put the shoulder back in place Jon squeezed his eyes shut, and winced in pain. It took everything in him not to pass out or scream. Kel was right if he would've come sooner it wouldn't have hurt as bad as it did. Right now it hurt tremendously.

Jon had a few tears fall.

 _Meanwhile in Ponch's room_

Alfred was starting to fall asleep, it was just too quiet and peaceful in the room. He was sitting as close to Ponch's bed as he could, he held Ponch's hand, and laid his head on the bed rail as his eyes began to close.

The window was still open, and it wasn't bothering him as much anymore, Nikki said she'd come in and close it soon. Alfred had thought he was asleep and in dreamland already when suddenly he felt a light squeeze on his hand.

His eyes slowly opened up, what was that? He wondered quietly. He sat up straighter he looked around the room only he and his son were the ones in there.

"I could've sworn I felt someone lightly squeeze my hand…" Alfred started. Then he turned his attention to where he hadn't been looking when he woke up, and suddenly his eyes were filling with tears.

Alfred let go of Ponch's hand for a second and pressed the nurse call button then grabbed Ponch's hand again. He smiled.

Ponch's eyes were slightly open.

Nikki and Brandi came in, with Jon and Kel close behind. "What's wrong, Alfred?" Kel asked.

Alfred looked at Kel. "He's waking up!"


	10. Chapter 10

Bear laid in bed tossing and turning, he couldn't find a comfortable position. He hadn't been able to relax ever since his interview, when Justin tried to accuse him of causing the accident on purpose so he wouldn't have to pay Ponch back all the money he owed.

The room was dark and nearly empty, just a book shelf on the far wall, and a night stand beside the bed. Bear was wrapped in his covers, completely tangled in them now from all of his moving around. The digital alarm clock glowed with a red light reflecting the time onto the ceiling. Bear tried not to pay too much attention he didn't want to know how long he'd been at this.

He continued to toss and turn until finally he couldn't take it anymore. He just wasn't going to get any sleep tonight and he knew it so what was the point in trying?

He got out of bed and walked to the kitchen, and opened the silver stainless steel fridge door to pull out a gallon of milk. As he poured the milk in his favorite blue cup, Bear's mind began to wander. He wondered how Ponch was doing right now. He hadn't been back to the hospital to see him since the day of the accident.

He had just figured everyone would be happier if he stayed far away from there, but not visiting was killing him.

Bear rubbed his eyes then turned on the news; they were still talking about the jewel thief and the officer who had gotten injured. Bear felt a feeling of hatred towards himself at that moment.

"Why couldn't you have been paying attention!" he yelled at himself then covered his face with his hands and began to sob, both angry and sad tears.

Bear continued to cry for a while until everything was suddenly interrupted by his phone ringing.

He reached over for the phone his hand shaky as he grabbed it, and pressed the talk button.

"H-Hello?"

"Bear, it's Jon," came the voice on the other end.

Bear sniffled a bit, and wiped away some tears. He took a deep breath. He looked at the clock. It was almost midnight, if Jon was calling at this hour something must've happened.

Bear felt his heart rate pick up and worry wash over him. "What's going on?" he asked finally.

"I thought you'd like to be the first to know that Ponch woke up about an hour ago," Jon said.

Bear let out the breath of air he didn't realize he'd been holding in. "R-Really?" he asked a new set of tears springing into his eyes, this time the joyful kind.

"Yeah," Jon replied.

"And you called me first?" Bear asked confused.

"Is there a problem with that?" Jon asked.

"Oh no, not at all…just surprised…I mean…I thought you guys were all mad at me," Bear admitted biting his lip.

"Bear, I think the only one still mad is Grossman," Jon replied. "And even then I think he let it go already…" Jon added.

Bear was silent for a while still unsure. He flopped down on his black leather couch. "Is he still awake?" Bear finally asked bringing the conversation back to the fact Ponch woke up and away from the topic of everyone being mad at him.

"I wish," Jon sighed. "He was only awake for a few minutes, he looked around the room a bit and then that was when all the pain set in…and he closed his eyes and went back to sleep," Jon said.

Bear nodded. "Alright, well I'll be there to visit in the morning," he said.

Jon smiled. "Ok."

Meanwhile at Getraer's house; Joe Getraer was lying in bed cuddled up close to Betty and sleeping when he heard the phone ring.

Betty mumbled something about ignoring it and rolled over.

Joe was about to ignore it and do the same when he realized the time and the fact one of his officers was in the hospital. What if something happened? Joe was in a slight panic as he grabbed the phone and answered.

"Hello?"

"Sarge, hey it's Jon."

"That's what I was afraid of," Getraer mumbled.

"Hey it's good news, Sarge!" Jon said.

Getraer looked at the clock. "It better be."

"Ponch woke up about an hour ago," Jon started. He didn't even get to finish.

"I'll be there soon," Joe said. He hung up before Jon could say more.

He began to move around a bit and start to get out of bed, he felt Betty grab his arm. "Hon, where you going?" she asked tiredly.

"Poncherello woke up," Joe replied. He leaned over and kissed his wife. "I'll be home later, I promise."

Betty hugged him and gave him a kiss.

Joe walked through the dark room; he grabbed some clothes from the closet and went to the bathroom to dress. After a few minutes he was ready and he quietly walked through the house to the door. He went out to the car and drove to the hospital.

oOoOo

The room was still cool and quiet; Alfred was beside the bed as Jon was in the back of the room making a few phone calls.

Dr. Brackett had left the room when Ponch fell asleep again. Everything seemed ok right now; he told them to come get him when Ponch woke up again.

Brandi and Nikki were still in the room getting ready to leave.

Jon had just gotten off the phone. "Brandi, can I talk to you?" he asked.

Brandi was staring at the floor with her hands in the pockets of her white nurse dress. "Yeah, sure," she said.

Jon led her to a quieter part of the room for them to talk.

Nikki couldn't help but look at the two of them for a while wondering what was going on.

Jon and Brandi sat in a couple of chairs. "Look, I'm sorry about how I was acting…I've been so focused on Ponch that I couldn't even take time for just a few minutes to talk to someone…it's not normal for that to happen. I acted like I didn't want to talk at all…and was being so difficult…and…"

Brandi smiled and put a hand on Jon's shoulder.

Jon looked at her.

"Jon, it's ok," she said. "Believe me if it were Nikki in that bed I'd have been acting the same way. I just think maybe you need a bit of a break sometime. I mean his dad is here for him right now, if you ever want to talk and get some coffee I'm here," she added.

Jon smiled slightly. "Thanks, Brandi."

Before she could answer she felt her friend Amber's hand on her shoulder. "Hey, Brandi we gotta go," she said.

"What?" Brandi asked looking at her confused.

"There are a ton of accident victims who were brought in from an accident on the freeway. They need me, you, and Nikki and all the help they can get in the E.R. right now," Amber said. She seemed in a rush which just showed Brandi how serious she was about this.

"I'm sorry, Jon…" Brandi started.

"Hey, it's all part of the job when you're needed you're needed. Get going I'll talk with you later," he said.

Brandi felt a wave of relief wash over her. She didn't feel as guilty leaving him now. She walked off quickly following Nikki and Amber.

As soon as the ladies left Jon turned his attention back to his friend. The smile on his face faded.

"Now why did you go straight back to sleep again?" Jon asked walking over to the bed. "I was looking forward to talking to you…"

Alfred looked at Jon. "He's exhausted and in pain, don't worry he'll wake up again when he's ready."

Jon sat down in a chair beside the bed. "Partner, please tell me you'll be ready soon," he said.

oOoOo

Alfred had gotten a call later on from Maria. She would be arriving in L.A. soon. He borrowed Jon's car and left to meet her at the airport.

The night seemed to drag on, Getraer had arrived soon after Alfred left and was sad when he found out Ponch had fallen asleep again. He stood by the bed and waited to see if Ponch would wake up.

The room had gotten dark so Jon turned a light on thinking it would be alright.

Getraer still stood beside the bed, he grabbed Ponch's hand. "Hey, Frank…I don't know if you're listening…I just want you to know I'm here for you. I'd really appreciate it if you woke up soon," he said.

Jon looked at Getraer not saying a word.

Ponch moved slightly thinking about waking up, he wanted to but the only thing which stopped him was he knew he was in more pain when he was awake…he wasn't sure he was ready for it. He didn't want to fight it and act like all was ok, he was weak he couldn't even pretend like everything was alright. He heard a voice, it sounded like someone he knew…he just couldn't figure out who or what it was they were saying to him. Flashbacks of when he woke up the first time ran through his mind, was that his dad sitting there beside the bed? What was he doing there…? What even happened Ponch wondered? If his dad was there it must've been something big…and if he was in this much pain it must've been something horrible…had he been in an accident? Ponch couldn't remember at all.

Whatever it was Ponch wanted answers, someone had have known something…where was Jon he always knew what was going on.

Ponch began to open his eyes again, the room wasn't as dark as it had been before it seemed a lot brighter, and it bothered him. His head was hurting pretty bad, and things seemed a little blurry he was trying to focus, and the blurriness and everything else was making him start to feel nauseous. He turned his head to one side and saw Jon sitting there.

Jon could see by the look in Ponch's eyes he was in pain. "Don't worry, partner I'll go get the doctor," Jon said. Before Ponch had a chance to speak to him Jon left to get Kel. Leaving Ponch alone or so he thought. He didn't realize Getraer was in the room.

Thinking he was alone Ponch began to panic what if Jon didn't come back? Ponch hadn't even heard what Jon said he was still waking up and not paying a lick of attention he just noticed that one second his partner was there the next second he's gone.

Ponch didn't want to be alone, so he tried to move. He wanted to leave and get out of here.

Getraer held him down. "Frank, hey you're gonna hurt yourself!"

Ponch turned his head. That was Getraer...but why was he there?

Ponch stared at him for a few moments and then without any warning Ponch just began to cry. He felt miserable and he wanted Jon back.

Getraer continued to hold his hand. "It's going to be alright, Frank," he assured. "Don't worry." Getraer glanced back to the door hoping either Jon, or one of Ponch's parents would walk through it soon. He couldn't handle this alone.


	11. Chapter 11

Ponch's parents arrived at the hospital in time to witness Ponch having a panic attack, and Getraer trying to calm him down while Jon went to get a doctor.

Ponch had sweat trickling down from his forehead, and felt his heart rate going up, it felt like his heart was racing. He felt like he couldn't breathe, and that just made him panic more.

"Frank, calm down!" Getraer said. He was holding on to him so he wouldn't move around too much, because one thing he knew was when Ponch got panicky he was normally all over the place.

Ponch was trying to calm down he looked at Getraer. Then turned his head and saw his parents coming in. His mind began to scream they couldn't see him like this. Ponch was getting squirmy he had to get out of there.

Alfred came to the other side of the bed, Maria stood behind him crying.

Alfred put a hand on Ponch. "Frank, calm down, everything will be ok," he said.

Ponch looked at him, his eyes wide.

"It's gonna be ok, just calm down," Getraer said, causing Ponch to turn his head to look at Getraer now.

"Ponch, it's gonna be ok," Alfred said.

Ponch turned his head again.

Alfred and Getraer shared a glance they knew one of them had to do the talking not both of them. Ponch wasn't enjoying turning his head every few seconds.

"Francis, you need to relax…I don't want you to hurt yourself," Maria said standing beside Alfred.

Ponch felt tears sting his eyes, he had missed his mother, and the last thing he wanted was for her to come and see him like this.

Jon came in with the doctor then.

"Ponch, you need to calm down," Kel said.

Ponch looked at him with wide eyes that began to fill with tears. He couldn't believe it, how could they say calm down when he didn't even know what was going on? He was in so much pain, and very confused how would he be able to calm down?

Brackett was checking Ponch over. "Ponch, when you calm down I'll explain what is going on," he assured.

With that to look forward to Ponch was doing his best to calm himself. He saw Jon, Getraer, and his parents all standing there worried. He wished there was something he could tell them to make them worry less.

Jon grabbed Ponch's hand. "Hey, buddy it's all gonna be alright," he said.

Ponch felt a few tears slip. 'is it really, Jon!?' his mind screamed but for some reason his voice betrayed him he couldn't speak. He just didn't have the strength.

Bear slipped in while Jon was talking to Ponch still. He hoped that Ponch wouldn't be upset with him, but when Ponch saw him he seemed to be really happy.

"Hi, Ponch," Bear said with a slight smile.

Ponch smiled. "H-H-H-Hi," he said finally getting his first word out.

"How you feeling?" Bear asked.

Ponch just shrugged slightly.

Bear nodded. "Yeah, I can't stay for too long I gotta get back to work. I thought I'd stop in and say hi before I went in though. I'm glad you're awake, you really gave me quite the scare," Bear said.

Ponch looked at Bear and opened his mouth to say something.

"Hey, hey save your strength buddy," Jon said. "You can talk all you want later but right now you need to rest," he added.

Ponch just looked at him. He didn't say anything, and Jon wished he could know what it was Ponch was thinking.

Jon lightly squeezed Ponch's hand. "It's alright," he said with a slight smile trying to calm him.

Ponch just took a deep breath and let it out.

Bear waited a little longer then slipped out of the room. He walked down the hall shaking his head. "He just woke up yesterday he normally would be super talkative by now," he said to himself as he turned the corner.

Dr. Adams over heard Bear talking to himself and shook his head. "I knew he'd never be the same," he muttered.

Bear didn't notice the doctor and just kept walking, and worrying over his friend. As soon as he left the hospital he was met with the bright sunshine and he started to squint. It was darker in the hospital than it was outside so it was shocker how bright it was. He walked to his car after adjusting to the brightness when he got into the car he started it and left sadly. He wished he could've stayed longer, and he wished he could've talked with Ponch about everything and apologize to him…but he could tell while he was there Ponch wasn't himself quite yet.

Jon seemed a little more uptight and worried than normal and it seemed like he didn't really want Bear there, so Bear left a lot sooner than he really had to.

When Bear arrived at the station Grossie was just going in. "Hi, Bear!" Grossie greeted trying to be nice again.

"Hi," Bear replied trying to hide the gloominess in his voice.

"You're a little earlier than normal," Grossie pointed out.

"Got up early to go see Ponch," Bear replied.

Grossie was a bit uptight about that topic. "You mean you actually feel ok going near him?" he asked his friendliness fading a little.

Bear took a deep breath and clenched his fists. "Grossie, listen to be completely honest with you I don't think Ponch even knows what happened. And if he does know he wasn't mad at me," Bear said.

"How would you know?" Grossie shot back fast, not having had the news spread to him yet.

"Ponch is awake, Grossie! He woke up last night," Bear said.

Grossie looked at Bear his mouth slightly dropped open. "No one told me that," he started.

"Sarge probably will say something later, he was there at the hospital when Ponch woke up the second time."

Grossie was silent the rest of the way to the door.

When they sat down for briefing Bear once again sat all alone in the back. Lately no one had wanted to sit with him. Surprisingly though Sindy decided to join him. She came and sat beside him and smiled. "Hey," she said with a smile.

"Hey," Bear replied with a weak smile.

"Cheer up, Barry things will get better soon," she said.

Bear was about to reply, but then Getraer entered the room.

Briefing lasted a little longer than normal, to Bear it seemed like it dragged on. But he was happy to get to be with Sindy longer since he wouldn't get to see her much while he was at the desk today.

Getraer finally started to wrap things up. "That's about it, oh and I think you'd all be happy to know Poncherello woke up last night. He's still not fully himself yet so I don't suggest too many visitors, but it looks like he'll be up for more visitors later," Getraer said.

Jeb raised his hand.

"Yes, Turner?" Getraer asked.

"Uh, Sarge is he better than what the doctors expected? Or…"

"I don't know yet, Jeb," Getraer replied looking down at his black binder.

Nothing much more was said after that the officers began filing out of the room. Getraer stopped Bear on his way out. "Baricza, we gotta talk before you start work, ok?"

"Yeah, sure, Sarge," Bear replied hesitantly. He was a little worried about what Getraer might want. He just wanted the whole mess to be over with, and Ponch to be out of the hospital already…why couldn't it be that easy?


	12. Chapter 12

Bear followed Getraer down the empty hall to the sergeant office.

Bear swallowed hard and clenched his fists tight. He was nervous, never been this nervous in his life... These past days had taken a lot out of him.

They turned the corner into Getraer's office and Bear began to bite his lip.

"Have a seat," Getraer said, closing the door behind them.

Bear went to the chair closest to the wall and a plant, and sat down. He began nervously rubbing the palms of his hands on his pant legs.

"Relax, you're not in trouble," Getraer said.

Bear looked at him confused. "If I'm not in trouble, why am I in here? And why are you acting the way you are?" He asked sharply. He was very tense right now.

Getraer tried not to snap at him. "Baricza, I have to talk to you sometime."

Bear looked at the filing cabinet "what can your filing cabinet drawer not close anymore because of me and Ponch?" He asked with a slight smile trying to pretend it was a great joke.

Joe shook his head. "I wanted to see how you were doing with everything."

Bear sighed. "It's been hard, Sarge…I can't sleep at night without thinking about what happened. I can't get the images out of my mind and it haunts me... The sounds, the things I saw... What was said to me after. I still haven't been forgiven I'm sure! They act like it sometimes but never have said one way or another. Sarge after IA is done with this investigation and I'm punished however I think I might leave the patrol."

Getraer let out a heavy sigh. "I'd like to say something to keep you, but I understand where you're coming from. I just hope you change your mind."

Bear shook his head. "I doubt I will. Is that all?"

Getraer had a sad expression in his eyes. "Oh uh the IA officers are going to talk to Poncherello or try to anyway. But we can't be certain he'll add to the story he might not remember anything," Getraer said.

Bear felt a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. The fact Ponch didn't know what happened to him was horrible enough, since it was such a bad accident. But explaining to one of your best friends it was your fault it happened might be even harder than that.

oOoOo

Ponch woke up a little more awake this morning, but he didn't see anyone and almost panicked until he felt a hand touch him. His head turned fast and he saw Jon smiling at him.

"Hey, partner. Did you sleep well?"

Ponch nodded slightly. He was trying to fight off the pain of this horrible migraine he kept waking up with. He closed his eyes and tried to relax.

"Your parents will be here in awhile. They went out for breakfast."

Ponch sighed. "Food…"

Jon looked at him his smile getting bigger. "You're hungry?"

"Yeah!"

"Alright I'll see what the nurses say," Jon said. He pressed the nurse call button to get the nurses in there.

When the nurses came in, Nikki smiled coming in. "Hey there, Ponch," she said.

Ponch smiled, Jon never told him he had a beautiful nurse.

Brandi came in behind Nikki, she smiled at Jon. "So, what's up guys? Just want company, or what?"

"Uh, Ponch is hungry," Jon said motioning towards Ponch.

Nikki grinned. "I'll go get you something," she said then left the room.

Ponch got comfortable and started to fall asleep, but soon was woken up by the sound of someone coming into the room.

Ponch looked up and saw two people, a male and female enter the room. Two people he hadn't seen before.

Jon looked over and saw it was Justin and Kendall and he sighed. "Already? He just woke up yesterday, guys," Jon said.

"Jon, it's better to get the information now then wait," Kendall said.

Jon shook his head. "I'll stay here if that's ok," Jon said.

"We normally don't let people in the room during an interview," Justin started.

"Guys, Ponch had a really bad panic attack when I left the room. Every time when he's awake and sees me even make a move for the door he gets jumpy. If you want him to talk then you'll have to do an interview with me in the room. Don't worry I can keep my mouth shut," Jon said.

Kendall looked at him unsure, but then remembered that Jon wouldn't lie to her…and Ponch had been through a lot. Jon was his best friend, so it would make sense he wanted Jon to stay with him.

"Alright, well you can stay but you need to stay off to the side out of the way, ok?"

Jon nodded. He squeezed Ponch's hand slightly. "Don't worry, partner everything will be alright," he said.

Ponch looked at Justin and Kendall with a very confused expression on his face.

Nikki was just about to enter the room with food at that time then, but Brandi was leaving and told her she'd have to wait.

"Some investigators are there getting ready to interview Ponch, so you'll have to wait to go in," Brandi said.

Nikki sighed. "Great!" she said rolling her eyes. She and Brandi went to the doctor's longue to get some coffee.

When the room was quiet, Justin set up a recorder. "I'm ready when you are," he said looking to Kendall.

Kendall nodded she went over to Ponch's bed. "Hi, Officer Poncherello, I'm Detective Kendall Forbes and this my partner Detective Justin Lightfoot, we just want to ask you a few questions about the accident," Kendall said fixing her hair into a messy bun.

Ponch didn't say much he just nodded his head slightly.

"So, start from the beginning, what you remember," Kendall said.

"I…I d-d-don't…r-r-r-remember…" Ponch started.

Kendall looked at Justin this wasn't a good sign for them, this would be a very short interview.

"You don't remember a thing? Nothing at all?" Justin asked.

Ponch shook his head then looked around for Jon.

Jon desperately wanted to go over and talk to Ponch, he could see Ponch getting upset.

Kendall wasn't getting anything more from Ponch, but she had gotten enough from the others that it was ok. She just wished Ponch could've remembered something.


	13. Chapter 13

Time went on, and a month later Ponch was starting to feel better. His leg was put into a cast and was healing slowly, but it was doing better.

Ponch was finally starting to somewhat be himself after one month he got his smile back. He still was very weak, the recovery would be a long one, but the doctors were certain he was going to be alright. They were also pleased to find he was doing a lot better than they had thought he would be.

Officers came to visit every day. Bear wasn't there very much right now IA. Was coming to the end of their investigation, and Bear right now was suspended without pay.

He wasn't enjoying it, he was just staying at home most the time doing nothing. He wanted to hang out with others, but there was no one to hang out with right now.

Jon was back to work now. Ponch's parents stayed with Ponch at the hospital, and Jon would come in and out whenever he could.

Bear decided he'd go visit Ponch since he had nothing better to do. On his drive over to the hospital he kept hearing voices in his head telling him maybe he shouldn't go visit. _'it's your fault he's there in the first place. He doesn't want to see you.'_ He thought. Bear shook his head.

"No, Ponch doesn't care about that," Bear said. He pulled into the parking lot at the hospital and sat there for a few minutes before leaving.

 _Inside the hospital_

Ponch wasn't feeling well at all, he tried to roll over on his side, but was stopped by his mother. Ponch just made a face at her and didn't ask her why he couldn't roll over he just pretended he didn't care.

His body ached, and his head throbbed. He turned his head to the side and squeezed his eyes shut tight trying to fight the pain.

"Honey, you ok?" Maria asked gently putting a hand on her son.

Ponch just nodded his head slightly and didn't say anything.

Maria looked over to Alfred who was still on the phone right now. Alfred was talking to Robert and Martin. She wished he was off the phone so she could talk to him, but she knew it was good that he talking with Ponch's brothers.

Alfred looked over to Maria. "Do you think Frank's apartment has enough room for Robert, Martin and Patti?" he asked covering the speaker on the phone.

Maria thought about it for a second. "Well sure, and we can make room for them if there isn't room," she said.

Alfred nodded then got back on the phone.

Maria sighed then smiled at Ponch she grabbed his hand. "Honey, your brothers and sister are coming," she said.

"I…h-h-heard," Ponch replied quietly barely above a whisper.

Maria smiled then they heard a knock at the door. Maria turned her head and saw Jeb walk in. Bear followed closely behind.

"Hi, guys," Maria said.

"Hey, how's Ponch?" Bear asked coming up to the bed.

"Tired," Maria replied.

Bear laughed slightly. "I bet you like this Ponch, get to sleep and be lazy as much as you want," he said playfully.

Ponch smiled slightly. "I'd rather be out there…on the…streets…with you…guys…" he said once again very quiet barely above a whisper.

Bear swallowed hard and looked at Jeb. "He doesn't know does he?" he asked quietly.

Jeb shook his head. "You can tell him if you want…but maybe you should wait."

Bear sighed heavily and came closer to Ponch he kneeled down so he was eye level with him.

"Ponch?"

"Y-Yeah, Bear?"

"I'm sorry," Bear said his gaze dropping.

Ponch's eyes opened and he looked at Bear confused. "For…what?"

Bear looked at Jeb who had opted to stay out of this and go stand closer to the door. Alfred and Maria were farther back too apparently all thinking Ponch wasn't going to react well to this.

Bear was worried their friendship was on the line. He wouldn't blame Ponch for hating him…but he'd sure be shocked if he didn't.

"Ponch…this is all my fault," Bear finally said.

Ponch almost laughed. "Oh yeah? And how…are you…g-g-gonna p-p-prove that?"

Bear looked at Ponch wide eyed. "You mean you don't believe me!?"

"C-C-Come on, Barry…everyone blames themselves for stuff that wasn't their fault..."

"But Ponch it was my fault. Believe me…I know I hate admitting it…it's been haunting me ever since the day of the accident. I thought I'd lose you and never get to apologize…and the sounds…the images…everything that comes back in a nightmare…the accident was horrible!"

"I…" Ponch tried to say something but wasn't sure what to tell his troubled friend.

"Ponch, I didn't mean to do it…I thought that I was catching the bad guy and I hit you instead…and those IA investigators thought I did it on purpose…so I wouldn't have to pay you back for that money I borrowed…" Bear added.

Ponch stared at him speechless.

"I understand if you hate me…and I…"

"Wait what?" Ponch asked interrupting him quickly.

"I said I understand if-" he got cut off again quickly.

"Bear, I don't hate you. Stuff happens, ok?" Ponch said. He sounded exhausted Bear had to listen very carefully every time Ponch spoke because his voice was so quiet he almost didn't hear him.

"But…everyone else hates me," Bear said.

"Baricza, just cuz they hate you doesn't mean I will."

Bear took a deep breath. "I have been suspended without pay for a few days now until IA finishes their investigation. I might be in a lot of trouble," Bear said.

"So that's why those guys came that one day…" Ponch said to himself. Then looked at Bear again. "I can try to help you…" he said with a smile. "But I can't promise anything I mean sometimes Getraer doesn't listen…" Ponch said.

Bear laughed slightly. "Ponch, you're the best! But whatever comes to me I'll take it, I deserve it," Bear said.

Ponch looked at him for a while before saying anything. "I'm still gonna try something, whether you like it or not…" he said with a yawn.

Bear looked patted him on the shoulder. "Get some rest, thanks for being so understanding," he said as he got up.

Ponch just nodded slightly. Then Jeb walked over to the bed he wanted to talk to Ponch about something too…


	14. Chapter 14

_"10-4, partner," Jon replied. He knew Ponch was behind the guy and had heard Sergeant Joe Getraer and Officer Artie Grossman both radio that they had caught up to Ponch and would follow his lead. Officer Barry Baricza was supposed to be approaching the other way on Market to block the intersection so that Ponch could drive the thief into the dead end alley on his right. Jon was concerned because he had not heard Bear acknowledge Ponch's instructions. Seconds later Jon watched as the thief speed through the intersection. He immediately moved to arrest the young man._

 _Meanwhile…_

 _"I can pull up and stop him," Bear said to himself. He was still upset about an argument with Sindy at lunchtime, and his mind was not fully focused on his job. He was not really with it, and never radioed his intentions. Ponch looked back to see what Sarge was doing just to make sure he still had back up. Bear turned the corner and began to go right in front of where the thief had been going. He was starting to come to a stop. He looked over and all he saw was a motorcycle coming his way. He thought it was the thief, because the thief was on a stolen CHP motor. He inched the car closer._

 _"Frank, watch out!" Joe yelled. Ponch looked forward just in time to see the car move into the intersection right in his path. With no time to react Ponch collided with the cruiser in a screech of scraping metal and the crunch of breaking glass. Ponch was flipped over a few times on the car as he fell off and then hit the ground hard. There were a few snapping noises and the loud crack of his helmet as it impacted the pavement. Bear thought it was the criminal at first until he heard Jon radio that he caught the guy._

 _"If that wasn't the bad guy I hit, who did I…." he started then saw Sarge running towards the car. Realization dawning on him Bear's eyes got wide, as he quickly got out of the car to be met with the sight of, Ponch lying motionless on his stomach on the asphalt. His head was turned to the left toward Bears car and his helmet was still fastened securely on his head. There was some blood on his face and Bear could see shards of glass embedded near his eyes and nose. There were also abrasions on his right cheek from where he rolled slightly across the pavement before stopping. His left leg was at a strange angle, Bear wanted to be sick as he saw the ends of bone protruding from Ponch's thigh through a rip in his blood soaked pants. Bear looked at his car and could see the spots that had been hit. On the other side where the motorcycle hit there was a big dent. The motorcycle was lying sideways on the ground. The mirrors were broken, and there was no windshield anymore. The front was all scrunched, and smashed. After looking around Bear was certain now he didn't catch the bad guy, he hit Ponch. "Ponch? Oh, Ponch I'm sorry…" Bear said as he approached Ponch,_

 _"You stay away, Baricza!" Joe said angrily and quickly._

 _Bear stepped back slightly in shock. "Sarge…." He started._

 _"Barry, the last thing he needs right now is you," Grossie told him as he joined._

 _"Guys, I didn't…." Bear started._

 _"Bear, you hit him," Grossie said. Joe was checking Ponch's injuries. He looked back at the two officers that were going back and forth at each other._

 _"Would you two quit it!? Grossman, you call for an ambulance. Baricza, you just stay out of the way. I have to talk to you," Joe said. Bear let out a long sigh, then stepped back and sat in his car. He knew if he tried to do anything he'd get into trouble._

 _"I didn't hit him," Bear told himself quietly. But quite honestly he wasn't sure who hit first, him or Ponch. Bear was starting to feel terrible about not paying enough attention. Joe heard a slight noise from Ponch._

 _"Hey, are you ok?" Joe asked. Ponch's eyes were open but held a glassy look, Joe could tell he wasn't fully there. "Hey, hang in there, ok?" Joe gently squeezed Ponch's hand. Soon Grossie was back beside him._

 _"Ambulance is on the way, so is Jon," Grossie said. Joe nodded._

 _"Hey, is he awake?" Grossie asked._

 _"Not really," Joe replied. From the way Ponch was whimpering and moaning Joe could tell he was in excruciating pain. "Hey, you're gonna be ok," Joe said trying to calm him down. He could tell Ponch was starting to go into shock, his breathing had changed to rapid shallow pants and he was shivering violently while covered with sweat. Bear wanted to get out of the car and be with his friend now. When he heard Sarge saying stuff to calm Ponch down he knew instantly that Ponch must be at least semiconscious. Jon arrived quickly. He rushed to Ponch._

 _"Hey, partner, are you ok?" he asked kneeling beside him while pulling off his gloves and helmet. He got no response except a slight moan._

 _While Jon spoke to Ponch, Joe called to Grossman, "Hey, Grossie bring me an emergency blanket will you? I think Ponch is in shock."_

 _"What happened?" Jon asked looking over at Sarge. Joe was about to respond when Grossie interrupted._

 _"Bear hit him," he said as he handed Sarge the shiny silver emergency blanket from his motor._

 _Jon looked over towards Bear, and after seeing the look of sadness and shame on his face he was almost certain that what he was told was true. "But why?" Jon asked._

 _"It was an accident, Jon," Bear said quickly before anyone could guess at why it all happened. "I was trying to catch the bad guy…I guess I was a little distracted by other things that I didn't tell anyone what I was up to. I pulled out in front of Ponch…." He finished. Jon stared at him a little longer._

 _"You pulled out in front of him while he was in the middle of a pursuit? Bear, did you not hear the sirens and all his radio messages? He was expecting you to stop on Market to block the thief's turn. Instead you turn onto Ash in front of him!" Jon was infuriated now. "How dumb can ya get!?" he yelled._

 _Bear wanted to slam his head down on the steering wheel and scream. Instead he took a deep breath and said calmly, "Jon, I didn't want to hit him."_

 _Jon looked at him. "Then why did you?" he replied, turning his attention back to his injured partner, not expecting an answer._

oOoOo

Ponch woke up startled by the dream it seemed so real to him, like it had happened. All the arguing between officers and Getraer getting upset…Jon being by his side…and Ponch being injured. It seemed familiar, but why? Ponch was only awake for a few moments before falling asleep again and going straight back to where he'd left off on that dream.

 _Joe was applying pressure to a pressure point on Ponch's left thigh above the protruding bone, while Jon talked softly to Ponch reassuring him that help was on the way. Jon could hear the sirens of fire trucks approaching. He looked up from where he sat beside his partner, as he recognized the engine and squad from Fire Station 51 he gave a sigh of relief. If Station 51 was responding it meant that Roy DeSoto and John Gage were the paramedics on duty and they were friends of both he and Ponch._

 _As Roy and Johnny approached the small group huddled on the side of the road, they were sad to see that their friend Ponch was the person in need of their help; but heartened to see that both Joe and Jon remembered the basic first aid they had taught their friends at CHP. They quickly stepped in and took over. As Johnny set up the radio to Rampart, Roy bent down beside Ponch._

 _"Having a rough day huh, Ponch?" Roy quipped to his friend, attempting to put him at ease and help him relax. He looked at Jon in concern as Ponch made no response other than a quickening of his breathing. He motioned to Jon to keep talking to Ponch and reassuring him as he began to check him over. Roy quickly took Ponch's vital signs frowning as he called to Johnny, "B/P 80 by palpation, Pulse 210 and weak, Respirations 85 and shallow, Eyes glassy and pupils sluggish, O2 83%, Lips and nails slightly cyanotic, Neck veins distended and no breath sounds on left side."_

 _As soon as Johnny heard that Ponch was having trouble breathing he called to Chet, "Chet help Roy set up O2 while I call Rampart." He paused then continued, "Roy you thinking tension pneumothorax?"_

 _"Almost certain," Roy replied. Having completed a cursory visual exam of the situation he relayed to Johnny, "Patient also has compound complex fracture of left femur, and possible head injury." "Oh, and Johnny he is lying on his stomach, we will have to roll him over before we can perform a needle thoracotomy," Roy added._

 _Johnny nodded solemnly and turned to the radio, "Rampart Base this is rescue 51. Repeat Rampart Base this is rescue 5 1 come in Rampart," he called._

 _Immediately he was rewarded with hearing the response of, "Go ahead 51, Rampart here. This is Doctor Adams. What is your situation?"_

 _"Rampart we have a 27 year old victim of a motorcycle accident. He has a compound complex fracture of the left femur, a possible head injury, and difficulty breathing. Vital signs are B/P 80 by palpation, Pulse 210 and weak, Respirations 85 and shallow, Eyes glassy and pupils sluggish, O2 83%, Lips and nails slightly cyanotic, Neck veins distended and no breath sounds on left side," Johnny reported._

oOoOo

Ponch woke up again in a cold sweat, his heart beating faster and he was breathing heavily. There was no doubt about it what he was dreaming about was real…it happened but when? He looked to the side his parents and siblings were gone at his apartment it was just Jon there with him tonight. Jon had fallen asleep though since Ponch should've been sleeping.

Ponch tried to calm himself on his own, but it wasn't working he was scared to death about going to sleep again and dreaming of that accident. Was that the accident he was in for now?

He looked at Jon. "J-J-Jon?" he tried to get him to wake up.

Jon didn't stir.

Ponch's voice was still very quiet and hard to hear at times since he was weak and recovering, Jon couldn't hear him. Ponch looked around his heart pounding inside of his chest. What was going on? He then noticed something he hadn't noticed before, Jon's cell phone on the edge of the bed.

Ponch hadn't had his cell phone with him for a while, so he wasn't able to call anyone, but seeing Jon's he had to use it. He grabbed the phone and called Getraer.

oOoOo

Getraer was in bed sleeping when his phone started to ring. He rolled over and grabbed it tiredly and answered.

"Hello?"

"S-S-S-Sarge?"

"Oh my…Poncherello! What are you doing awake? And why are you on the phone?"

"S-S-Sarge…Jon's asleep…I…had a nightmare…" Ponch said.

Getraer's brow furrowed. "A nightmare?"

"Yeah…I was in an accident…it was bad…Bear caused it…"

Getraer gasped. "Oh Ponch!" he had to call Kendall after this. "Ponch, that accident happened. It's why you're in the hospital. The dream you had…it was a memory…you forgot all about the accident. But now you're recovering and the memory was brought back to you through a dream. You're gonna need to tell someone what happened," Getraer said.

"I don't want those people to come back!" Ponch started to cry.

Getraer didn't know what was going on now. Ponch normally wasn't emotional like that…there had to be something he could do to help. He was on his way to the hospital now.


	15. Chapter 15

_Bear put a hand on Jon's shoulder. "He'll be ok, Jon. It's Ponch we're talking about. He's always ok…he's a fighter, he's stubborn, always got to prove that doctor wrong…and man I don't think I know a single person in this world that has determination like Ponch. He'll stop at nothing to get better, and you know it," Bear said._

Jon woke up and looked over at his sleeping partner. He'd come a long way since the accident. He'd proved Dr. Adams wrong, that's for sure. He smiled slightly at that thought. They hadn't had many problems with Dr. Adams lately, Jon figured he was keeping busy with other patients.

"I can't believe it's been a few months…" Jon muttered to himself looking at a calendar on his phone. Recovery may have been slow, but it was a lot faster than what everyone else had figured on. Jon enjoyed getting to know Brandi and Nikki this whole time though. He knew Ponch was enjoying Nikki.

Ponch's family was there at the hospital everyday during the morning and afternoon hours, and Jon spent the night there with Ponch each night. It was nice getting this time alone with his partner to chat sometimes. Ponch normally would be asleep, but he woke up a lot during the night. What Jon didn't know was that Ponch had been up already this night and had called Getraer about his nightmare.

Jon was still sitting there peacefully when suddenly the door burst open and Getraer walked in.

Jon looked back, turning quick. "Sarge? What are you-" he started.

"Did he fall back to sleep?" Getraer asked coming beside the bed not even taking a glance at Jon. Jon stood up beside Getraer.

"I didn't know he ever woke up…" he admitted staring at his hands that he had on the bed rail.

"He uh, had a dream about the accident, Jon. Couldn't get you to wake up and somehow got a hold of your phone. He called me," Getraer told him.

Bear showed up a few seconds after Getraer finished talking. He was breathing heavily as he rushed in. He noticed Jon and Joe standing at the bed and he took a deep breath and tried to relax.

"What, he call you too?" Jon asked feeling hurt inside that he hadn't been able to wake up and be there for his friend.

"It was a text actually. He ok now?" Bear asked.

"Well he's asleep again," Jon said not sure if that was good or not.

oOoOo

 _Kendall nodded she went over to Ponch's bed. "Hi, Officer Poncherello, I'm Detective Kendall Forbes and this my partner Detective Justin Lightfoot, we just want to ask you a few questions about the accident," Kendall said fixing her hair into a messy bun._

 _Ponch didn't say much he just nodded his head slightly._

 _"So, start from the beginning, what you remember," Kendall said._

 _"I…I d-d-don't…r-r-r-remember…" Ponch started._

 _Kendall looked at Justin this wasn't a good sign for them, this would be a very short interview._

 _"You don't remember a thing? Nothing at all?" Justin asked._

 _Ponch shook his head then looked around for Jon._

 _Jon desperately wanted to go over and talk to Ponch, he could see Ponch getting upset._

 _Kendall wasn't getting anything more from Ponch, but she had gotten enough from the others that it was ok. She just wished Ponch could've remembered something._

oOoOo

Ponch woke up suddenly and started to sit up straight, but soon felt hands on his shoulders holding him down. That dream wasn't anything bad really, he just remembered that Getraer had said he was calling those detectives back. It wasn't that he was afraid of them…he just he didn't want Bear to get into trouble and he didn't want anything bad to happen. Just talking to them made him feel tense, he hoped not to ever see them again.

"Ponch?" Jon asked breaking through Ponch's thoughts.

Ponch's head snapped to the side looking over at the three men standing beside his bed. "J-Jon? You…you were asleep…" he started.

"I know, I know I'm sorry!" Jon apologized.

Ponch shook his head. "No, it's fine." He looked over at Bear and Getraer. "S-S-S-Sarge…those…those detectives…" he started swallowing hard.

"Yeah?" Getraer asked hoping now would be the time he found out why Ponch had broke down crying during their conversation when Kendall and Justin were brought up.

"They aren't going to do anything to…B-B-Bear…right?"

"Huh?" Getraer asked a little confused now.

Bear looked at Ponch with pleading eyes _. 'you don't need to do this, Ponch!"_ his mind screamed.

Ponch avoided his glance, and looked at Getraer still. "B-B-Bear…he's not…gonna get…into trouble…right?" he asked. He was tired and his voice was barely above a whisper. It took a lot to talk, so he had to take pauses in between words.

"Well I don't know, but…"

"But you'll…d-d-do everything… to protect him, right?" Ponch spoke up quick before Getraer could finish.

Getraer looked at Bear. Bear just shrugged slightly, he didn't know what else to do.

"I'll do what I can," Getraer replied finally.

oOoOo

Alfred, Maria, Robert, Martin, and Patti all came to the hospital to see Ponch. The three siblings were exhausted and sat down in a chairs and fell asleep. Maria and Alfred stayed close by the bed. Jon was with them, but he'd be leaving soon for work. Jon listened to them chatting about different things. From what he could tell Ponch's siblings hadn't been good at keeping the apartment clean, but Alfred wasn't exactly the cleanest either. Jon still remembered the first day when Alfred got in.

 _Alfred dropped his bags in the middle of the floor and then went on a quest for some food in the fridge._

 _"Are you just gonna leave your things there?" Jon asked._

 _"Oh I'll get that later. I mean…I'm supposed to make myself at home, aren't I?" Alfred replied with a ding dong in his hand._

 _"Wow…now I see where Ponch gets some of his habits from…" Jon said quietly to himself._

 _Alfred then joined him in the living room again. He moved his bags up onto the couch. "I'm not sure how long I'm staying but I packed a lot…just in case."_

 _"I noticed," Jon commented while looking at all the stuff._

 _Alfred didn't notice so much he was looking around the place. He hadn't visited in a while. "Well I guess it's time to go. I wanna know how Frank is doing," Alfred finally said as he came back over._

 _Jon then led him out the door._

Jon laughed to himself the memory was funny. Ponch was a lot like his father, he hadn't realized how much the two were alike until he met Alfred. Not only was it just the eating ding dongs, putting their things wherever and making messes, they also looked and talked alike too. Jon still remembered the day he picked him up at the airport.

 _Flashback_

 _Jon was waiting for the flight to come in. Alfred called and said it would be arriving soon. Jon waited, he couldn't wait to get back to the hospital though. All that was on his mind was Ponch. He wanted to know how everything was going there. Jon was sitting in a chair by a window staring straight ahead. There were a lot of people crowding around either waiting for the plane to come in, or they were waiting for their own plane. Jon was starting to fall asleep. He hadn't gotten much sleep lately._

 _Jon had dozed off in the chair and had been sleeping a few minutes when all the sudden he felt something or someone poke him. His eyes opened slightly, and for a second there he thought he saw Ponch. But when he was fully awake he realized that was Alfred. Just as many people had said time after time, Ponch and Alfred looked A LOT alike! Of course Alfred looked much older, because he was older, but just like people had told Jon Alfred does look like Ponch and it wasn't until just now that he really paid attention to that._

 _"Hey there, Jon you ready to go?" Alfred asked._

 _"Dang it he even sounds like Ponch…" Jon thought. "Yeah sure, let's get your stuff dropped off at Ponch's place then we'll go see what's going on down at the hospital._

 _End flashback_

Jon was once again laughing to himself. He wished that Alfred could've come for a better reason so they could hang out Jon, Alfred and Ponch and have fun. Maybe they'd have to try that sometime. He was interested in seeing how the two had fun. Since they were so much alike he figured they normally agreed on everything they did. So it wouldn't be much of an argument on that. Unless of course Jon didn't agree!

oOoOo

Jon was sitting at a stoplight and watched as a speeder went by, Jon took off after him calling it in as he went. He hoped that everything would be alright as he did this, no troubles. The last thing he needed was another accident.

Jon pulled up beside the car. "Pull it over!" he yelled pointing to the roadside.

The guy in the car just looked at Jon without saying a word.

"Pull it over!" Jon repeated louder.

The guy got a smirk on his face as he did what he was about to do. "Oh, you mean this way?" he said swerving off to the side smashing the side of his car into Jon knocking him off balance.

Jon tried to fix himself before he crashed, but he couldn't, and he flipped with his bike in front of another car and was hit.

Jeb was nearby when the accident occurred. He called it in then went to assist Jon.

"Jeb…get that guy," Jon said waving him off.

"But Jon," Jeb protested.

"Jeb just go!" Jon said.

Jeb looked back a few times before rushing off he watched and saw Bonnie pulling up on scene as he left.

Jon lost consciousness before Bonnie got to him.

oOoOo

 _Ponch began to open his eyes again, the room wasn't as dark as it had been before it seemed a lot brighter, and it bothered him. His head was hurting pretty bad, and things seemed a little blurry he was trying to focus, and the blurriness and everything else was making him start to feel nauseous. He turned his head to one side and saw Jon sitting there._

 _Jon could see by the look in Ponch's eyes he was in pain. "Don't worry, partner I'll go get the doctor," Jon said. Before Ponch had a chance to speak to him Jon left to get Kel. Leaving Ponch alone or so he thought. He didn't realize Getraer was in the room._

 _Thinking he was alone Ponch began to panic what if Jon didn't come back? Ponch hadn't even heard what Jon said he was still waking up and not paying a lick of attention he just noticed that one second his partner was there the next second he's gone._

 _Ponch didn't want to be alone, so he tried to move. He wanted to leave and get out of here._

 _Getraer held him down. "Frank, hey you're gonna hurt yourself!"_

 _Ponch turned his head. That was Getraer...but why was he there?_

 _Ponch stared at him for a few moments and then without any warning Ponch just began to cry. He felt miserable and he wanted Jon back._

 _Getraer continued to hold his hand. "It's going to be alright, Frank," he assured. "Don't worry." Getraer glanced back to the door hoping either Jon, or one of Ponch's parents would walk through it soon. He couldn't handle this alone._

oOoOo

Ponch woke up abruptly from his dream. He looked around. "Where's Jon!? It's…it's six…" he started. He had been having dreams of panic attacks since Jon hadn't come yet, it was haunting him. He knew he was getting close to having another but was thankful people were there to keep him calm during this. He looked over and saw his father still sitting there. His eyes held that same soft expression he had had the first time Ponch woke up.

"I don't know, he'll be here soon, I'm sure," Alfred said gently rubbing Ponch's hand with his thumb. He wasn't about to tell his son he had heard of Jon's accident already. Ponch might be getting a roommate.

oOoOo

Jon opened his eyes a few times barely conscious as he was being brought in. He caught a glimpse of Kel and his mind went straight to the encounter they had had when he visited him at his office that one night.

 _Kel was sitting at his desk, a cup of coffee in front of him, his phone on the right side of him, and big bowl of mint Oreo ice cream in front of him. He was on break for a few minutes and decided to have a bowl of ice cream, he deserved it…and he loved ice cream. He'd never admit he hid in his office sometimes with a bowl of ice cream…but there were times when he needed to get away and indulge in his favorite snack._

 _Soon he heard a knock on the door. For the first time ever he'd been caught on an ice cream break. Not that he took them often, just once every few months._

 _Kel took the last bite and swallowed before saying, "Come in!"_

 _The door opened and in walked Jon. Jon looked exhausted. He forced a smile though. "Sorry, am I interrupting something?" he asked._

 _Kel then noticed Pandora was still playing on his phone, just classical music for him to relax while he enjoyed coffee and ice cream. Kel turned off the music._

 _"Sorry about that," he said instantly going back to his normal professional self._

 _"No, no it's fine. I like to see the nonprofessional side of Kelly Brackett. So what was that classical music? And is that a finished bowl of ice cream?" Jon asked as he made sure to close the door._

 _Kel nodded. "Yeah, I admit it's a guilty pleasure of mine. Every once in a while on a stressful day or on the best days I have to break out a bowl of ice cream. That information doesn't leave this room."_

 _"I don't know…" Jon started._

 _"If you tell anyone, I know how to shut down your entire body and I could do it during your next surgery."_

 _"Is that a threat, doctor?" Jon asked a hint of playfulness in his voice and in his eyes._

 _"Possibly," Kel replied as he placed his hands behind his head interlocking the fingers, and then leaned back in his seat._

 _Jon laughed slightly "Well alright then I won't say a word."_

 _Kel forced a small smile. "What are you here for Jon?" he knew Jon came for a reason._

oOoOo

Jon's head was spinning by the time his flashback was over, and his eyes began to close. He hoped they caught whoever had caused this, and he sure hoped that Ponch wouldn't be too upset.

 _A/N: Happy one year anniversary to On A Wing and A Prayer! Thank you all for sticking with me since the beginning and coming still while it's going. It means a lot! I hope to bring you a satisfying ending soon, but for now stay tuned thanks so much! Special shout outs to Tbookworm my first beta reader. Divawannabe24 my current beta reader, you rock! And a special thanks to Alltrekkedup, Koffeekat, and anerrorhasoccuredloadinglife for all your interest and support! You always bring a smile to my face when I hear what you have to say. Thanks to everyone who has favorites, followed, viewed and/or reviewed. You are all very appreciated! Hope you enjoyed the chapter and stay tuned for more!_


	16. Chapter 16

Ponch woke up and sat up straight in his bed, his heart beating fast, and sweat trickling down from his brow. He looked around, no one was in the room. It wasn't normal for him to be alone…Ponch was scared, what was going on? He decided he'd have to find out for himself. The only way to find out was to get out of bed…

oOoOo

Jon was laying on a hospital bed not sure what was going on. He was awake and looking around the room, it was dark, cold and medium size. It reminded him of the room Ponch had been in. Only it was a little bigger than that room and there was another bed. Jon figured they wouldn't have put him with Ponch anyway, wasn't Ponch still in ICU?

Well Jon got his answer pretty soon after that when he looked over at the bed beside him, which he had before thought was empty…but now he saw his best friend half hanging on the bed and half on the floor.

"Oh my gosh! Ponch!" Jon wasn't sure what had happened. He was surprised he was able to yell that, he hadn't felt like yelling.

Jon looked around desperately for the nurse call button, but found that this sudden movement was painful. He cried out in pain. That didn't stop him though he wasn't going to just let the situation slide he laid there for a minute trying to relax, then moved again.

He found the button just slightly above his bed and to the right and he pressed it then he stopped moving for a second to catch his breath. He looked over at his partner again. "P-P-Ponch?" he tried to talk to him.

Ponch then fell completely out of the bed. He hadn't unhooked anything that was connected to him, but the IV in his arm ripped out when he fell and pulled on it. He was thankful that for the most part he wasn't hooked up to anything anymore. He was breathing on his own, his heart beat was always normal, he was pretty close to getting ready to go home for resting. But now…now things might've been different just because of this stupid decision.

Ponch hit his head when he fell out of bed, and he was pretty out of it now. When Jon saw him Ponch's eyes were closed, Jon didn't even know if he was alive!

"Ponch…talk to me!" Jon demanded tears forming in his eyes.

Nikki and Brandi rushed into the room took one glance at what had happened then turned and left to get a doctor. Amber joined them in the room after doctor's Brackett and Adams entered.

"What happened in here!?" Adams demanded from Jon.

"I…I don't know," he stammered. "I woke up…and found him like…like that," he admitted. Jon was breathing heavily, starting to panic.

"Jon, calm down," Brandi said. "We don't need you hurting yourself," she said coming beside his bed.

Jon took a deep breath, shakily letting it out. His ribs were killing him right now, but he tried to take his mind off of that his friend was hurting. Why would he even attempt to get out of bed without permission!? He hadn't been out of bed in months without some help, he was so weak! To think he could get up with no help at all was just silly.

Jon shook his head. "Why? Why Ponch…why'd you do this to yourself?" he wondered aloud.

"Jon, he probably heard about you and panicked. He wanted to find out if you were ok, but didn't know you were with him. Either that or he saw you across the room and wanted to come over and make sure you were ok," Kel said knowing either option could be correct. Knowing Ponch it was more likely the second one.

Kel and Ryan got Ponch back up into his bed and began checking him over.

"There's no farther damage done, right?" Jon asked fearing the worst. He knew Ponch had been making a good recovery and this little incident might've turned things around.

"We won't know until after a few tests and he wakes up," Kel replied.

Jon nodded, he looked at his friend laying so still. This had been the longest few months of his entire life, and the first time he'd ever seen Ponch lay so still for a long period of time. He hated it! He wanted it to be over with, and deep down inside of him he still was blaming Bear and had a built up anger towards him. If he saw Bear again before Ponch woke up he might lash out on him, so he hoped Bear stayed as far away as possible, but no such luck there.

After the doctors left telling Nikki, Brandi, and Amber what tests were going to take place who should show up, but Barry Baricza.

Jon felt his face turning red, and going hot. He glared at him. "Why are you here!?" he snapped the instant Bear was in his sight.

"Um…I came to visit?" Bear replied questioning whether or not he should stay.

"This is all your fault! Ponch wouldn't be in this mess right now if it weren't for you being careless in the first place! You don't belong here! Heck he shouldn't even be speaking to you, but for some reason he has found it in his heart to forgive you," Jon said angrily.

"Jon, I don't know what happened to make you mad at me all the sudden again, but I'm sorry. Really I am! Me and Ponch worked everything out, he's not mad at me, and you shouldn't be either…"

"I shouldn't be mad!? You nearly kill my best friend and I'm supposed to be happy about it!" Jon snapped.

"Well I never said you had to be happy!" Bear yelled back. It was just then he had caught a glance at Ponch. A new bruise forming on his forehead, and he was more still than he had been the night before when he was asleep. Bear jumped to the conclusion then that he wasn't just asleep. He looked back to the banged up and angry blonde officer. "What happened to Ponch? That bruise wasn't there last night," Bear said.

Jon glared at Bear for a minute. "Mister observant, huh?"

"Jon, cut it out. I just came to visit I didn't need this crap you're pulling on me. I thought you forgave me!"

"Ponch is weak, Barry…and he can't accept the fact he needs help to do things. He's still recovering from what you did to him! After my accident Ponch must've panicked or something…he tried to get out of bed and there was no one to stop him. He can't walk on his own yet he's not strong enough he hasn't healed! He fell and hit his head pretty good, I don't know how long he's been out, but none of it would've happened if you didn't cause that accident in the first place! He wouldn't even have to be here!" Jon yelled at Bear.

Bear blinked back angry tears. He took another glance at his motionless friend, sadness and pain filling his heart he wanted more than anything to take Ponch's place. Jon had no idea how much he had wished over these last months that he could've been able to take Ponch's place or just take the pain away. He looked at Jon again, angered and if he could he would've strangled Bear.

Bear blinked again then left the room he couldn't handle it anymore. An angry Jon was bad enough, but to have him angry with you was a whole other thing. Bear felt like he didn't belong here anymore he was going to go back to Central and tell Getraer he was leaving the patrol, he couldn't handle all this pain.

oOoOo

Hours after Bear left, Jon was calmed down. Kel was coming in the room to check on Ponch and Jon. He checked over Ponch first, there had been no changes, and Kel frowned before making his way over to Jon.

"What is it?" Jon asked knowing something was wrong.

"Well, the good news is the tests didn't show any farther damage," Kel began.

"And the bad news?" Jon asked cautiously knowing there had to be bad news.

Kel sighed and shook his head. "Jon, Ponch slipped into a coma. We can't say when exactly he'll be waking up again…"

"Or if he'll be waking up again," Jon concluded.

"Jon, don't give up hope. He's a fighter, he'll wake up when he's ready."

Jon sighed he wished that Ponch was ready now! He was worried sick about him.

"Get some rest," Kel said patting Jon's shoulder lightly before leaving.

Jon nodded as a small tear fell from his eye. "Please come back to me, partner…don't die…" Jon said.


	17. Chapter 17

Bear stormed in through the doors of Central, blowing past Grossie and Jeb on his way to the sergeants office.

"Someone's angry, but I'd be more careful if I were you, Barry. You know what happened the last time you ran someone over," Grossie playfully teased. Bear didn't take it that way though, he got even more mad.

He marched straight into Getraer's officer without knocking, and tossed his badge on the desk in front of Getraer. "I quit!" he said.

Getraer looked up at the tall dark haired officer. His whole body was tense, his fists were clenched tight, and his face was red. "What happened?" Getraer asked calmly grabbing the badge. He'd do everything he could to keep Bear, and if what he tried didn't work, then he'd be saying goodbye to one of his finest officers.

"Everyone said they forgave me, but that's a lie!"

"Barry, sometimes it's hard to forgive so easily when someone has been seriously hurt. We have to work through this together though, and we can't work together if you're gone."

"Everyone would be happier if I left," Bear shot back. "It's been hard enough on me as it is, I don't need their crap all the time too."

"This will be over before you know it. I'll talk to the others, and we can get everything sorted out. We are police officers here you know. We don't hide from our problems and run away at the sight of danger. We fight it, even if we are alone."

"I am alone, I have been alone this whole time. It's never getting better it's only going downhill. I got a small taste of people treating me normally again for only a few days then it turned around again. It's never going to change, Sarge! I can't just fight it like you say. This is a situation I need out of before I end up doing something stupid!"

"Barry, just stay things always get worse before they get better. It will all be back to normal soon," Getraer offered.

"Why should I stay!? Everything here has turned into a nightmare, I'm the most hated person in the station. The only one that still likes me is Ponch, and he's in a coma!" Bear said not paying attention to how Getraer said things will get worse before they get better.

"WHAT!?" Getraer asked wide eyed.

Grossie and Jeb peeked their heads in the door, that had failed to be closed after hearing the words Ponch and coma.

Bear was taking a deep breath trying to calm himself down before any more words were spoken.

"What about Ponch?" Grossie asked.

"What about a coma?" Jeb asked.

Bear never even turned to look at the two officers in the doorway. He just quietly spoke, responding to them. "Ponch fell out of bed, hit his head pretty good and wound up in a coma…Jon blames me for everything. Said it never would've happened if I hadn't hit Ponch in the first place. This is the exact reason I need out of here, Sarge," he said looking at Getraer now. "I can't handle being around Jon…or anyone right now."

"Barry, I want you to keep your badge and think this over more carefully before making a final decision. You are acting more off of your emotions right now than anything else. Once you are sure you have made the right choice come back and tell me, but I want you to remember one thing."

"What's that?" Bear asked.

"Don't let what others are thinking or saying about you now influence your decision."

Bear nodded and pushed past Jeb and Grossie on his way out the door. "I hope he stays," Grossie muttered.

Jeb nodded in agreement.

oOoOo

The room was warm, and the air was filled with the scent of coffee. Dr. Adams sat at the table with Dr. Brackett sharing a coffee break. Something the two of them wouldn't normally do. In all honesty Kel couldn't stand Adams at times and was happy to not have to work with him 24/7. Adams felt the same about Kel.

They were both seated in orange chairs at a small round table near a window in the room. Adams was warming his hands up with the coffee more than he was drinking it. He could feel Kel glaring at him as this conversation had not been going over too well.

"To be completely honest, doctor with all he's been through I wouldn't be shocked if he did this on purpose in an attempt to get out," Adams said.

"If by get out you mean killing himself then forget it! I know Ponch better than that."

Ryan let out an exasperated sigh. "Then what else would it be?"

"Can't you just open your eyes and see what is really going on for the first time, doctor!?" Kel snapped. He hadn't meant to crack yet, but it happened. He'd never admit it, but he had a soft spot for Ponch…so hearing someone for months now, someone who was his doctor! Give up on him, say he was going to die, or become a vegetable or that he had tried to commit suicide just a few hours ago when he fell out of bed and ended up back in a coma again. Hearing all of that, just mad Kel's blood boil.

Adams was in shock at Kel snapping at him. "Open my eyes to what's really going on here? And what might that be?"

"He knew something happened to Jon when he woke up and Jon wasn't there like normal. Ponch is a smart guy, he knew something was wrong. The one thing he didn't think through was how him trying to get out of bed was going to work out. My guess is he acted off of his panic that Jon was in serious danger and he needed to get to him."

"Which would be why he tried to get up…" Adams was starting to agree knowing that was more logical. "But what if you're wrong?" he asked suddenly going back to trying to prove his point.

"I'd be shocked if it were anything other than that," Kel replied honestly.

Adams didn't say a word after that, he was fighting it. He wanted to disagree with Kel, just for the sake of disagreeing but he knew deep down that Kel was more than likely correct. So instead of saying anything more he stood up pushing his chair back as he stood then moved out from behind the table. He Pushed his chair in and took his coffee cup to the sink and rinsed it out then left the room.

As he was leaving Johnny and Roy were entering, he pushed past them almost knocking Roy over as he did so.

"What's his problem?" Johnny asked staring after him until the door swung shut.

"Don't worry about it, junior," Roy said heading for the coffee pot.

"He about ran you into the wall, Roy!"

Roy shrugged. "But he didn't" he said then took a sip of his coffee and sat down across from Kel. "How's Ponch? We were planning on visiting if that's ok," Roy asked changing the subject.

"It should be ok for you to visit. Just know that Ponch got a roommate now, so be considerate if Jon wants to sleep," Kel said.

"Jon!?" Johnny asked in shock.

"What happened to Baker?" Roy asked.

"Traffic accident," Kel replied not going into detail.

Roy and Johnny nodded. "How's Ponch handling having Jon as a roommate? He doing ok?"

"Ponch didn't know Jon was his roommate, and tried to get out of bed when he woke up and no one was around. Jon should've been there at that time, Ponch knew it and he panicked."

"Why do I not like the sound of this already," Johnny muttered.

Kel shot him a look before continuing. "He ended up falling out of bed, hit his head hard and slipped into a coma," Kel finished.

Roy and Johnny looked at each other. Then made up their minds they'd visit Ponch as soon as they finished their coffee. He might've been in a coma, but he could still hear them when they spoke and maybe just maybe it would help if he knew his friends were all there for him.

oOoOo

Jon was awake looking over at Ponch's bed. He wanted to go over to him. There had to be a way. Finally he thought of something, the answer was Brandi. He pressed the nurse call button.

Brandi and Nikki both came in. "Jon? What's wrong?" Brandi asked trying to hide the fear in her voice she had feelings for the blonde officer and worried for him as he was here.

"I need to talk to you, Brandi," Jon said.

Nikki took a hint that she didn't need to be there so she made an exit as Brandi came up to the bed. "What's up?" she asked.

Jon tried to sit up, but the sudden movement cause pain to shoot through his body. He cringed.

"Pain meds?" she asked. She knew Jon had broken his ribs reinjured his shoulder, and had a slight concussion.

He shook his head and with a hand motion waved that off. "No, no pain meds. I…I was wondering if there were any possible way you could get me into a chair beside Ponch's bed?" he asked keeping his voice steady, fighting through the pain.

Brandi almost laughed. "Jon, you know I can't do that! You have to stay in bed. Besides you're in no shape to be sitting in a char right now," she said.

Jon looked at her giving her the sad puppy dog eyes. "Come on, Brandi, please?"

"Jonathan Baker, no!" she said standing firm on that. She grabbed his hand. "I want you to get better, and you need to rest to do that. You might be able to sit beside his bed tomorrow," Brandi added.

Jon smiled slightly at the red head nurse standing beside his bed. "Ok."

"Is that all you wanted?" Brandi asked.

Jon nodded. "Maybe some pain meds now, if you don't mind. It might speed up my recovery," Jon said.

Brandi laughed "Alright, I'll be back in a few minutes," she said leaving the room.

As soon as she left Jon turned and looked at Ponch. "I tried, partner, I tried," he said. As soon as those words came out he noticed Ponch begin to stir, or at least he thought he saw that. It only lasted a few moments until he was completely still again and still out. Maybe Jon had been imagining things, but what if Ponch really was trying to wake up?


	18. Chapter 18

Jon found that he had been wrong, and only seeing things. Ponch was still out, and stayed out for three more days. It had been the longest three days of Jon's life. He woke up early in the morning and watched over his partner the rest of the day, taking small naps in between.

During one of Jon's mini naps, Ponch had woken up and looked around the room. Everything seemed different to him than it had before. He wasn't as used to his normal room as he was his ICU room. It was a lot bigger in here, there was a tv mounted on the wall, and he looked over and saw Jon was in a bed a few feet away from his bed. He relaxed knowing Jon was there, but seeing that Jon was in a hospital bed and a little beat up he was worried.

"Jon?" he asked. No answer. "Jon?" he asked again Jon didn't even stir. "You better just be sleeping, man," Ponch said. He moved to get more comfortable. His head was killing him! He squeezed his eyes shut and a few tears fell as he tried to fight the pain. He ended up drifting back off to sleep after a while.

 _oOoOo_

 _Bear walked into a dark alley, he was shaking and angry. There was a man waiting for him in the back of the alley, with a couple of small bags in his hands. Bear came closer, he never saw the man's face in the shadows, he just knew by what was in his hands and where they were that it was who had come to meet._

 _"You Big G?" Bear asked in a low whisper his voice shaking slightly._

 _The welly built, larger man stood up straighter from his spot leaning against the brick building. "Yeah, and you must be Bear? Dev said I'd meet you here," he replied he had a deep voice that sent a shiver down Bear's spine. What was he doing here?_

 _He nodded. "Yeah, that's me…you got the dope?"_

 _"Depends, you got the dough?"_

 _'that means money, right?' Bear had to remind himself. He nodded. "Yep I do." He slipped money into Big G's hand while Big G slipped a bag of white powder into his hand._

 _Bear took it and left, he went home. For three days the same thing happened he'd meet there and take it home, never taking it in front of Big G, Big G either didn't care what time he took it or he figured it was best he didn't watch him take it. But was Bear actually taking it? No…he kept it all in a drawer at home._

 _oOoOo_

 _Ponch came to visit Bear one night, Bear was just getting ready to leave for the alley again when the doorbell rang._

 _"Oh, Ponch…I was just leaving," Bear said._

 _"So I can't visit?" Ponch asked._

 _"No…not now," Bear said._

 _Ponch stared at his friend it was weird for him to turn him away like this, even if he was going somewhere he normally would ask if there was anything going on, but not today he seemed in too much of a hurry. Ponch wondered why._

 _As soon as Bear left and started his walk down the sidewalk to the dark alley Ponch started walking. He kept a few steps behind so Bear wouldn't spot him._

 _Ponch felt a shiver go down his spine as he followed…why was Bear turning down that alley? And what was with the ripped up jeans, and oversized sweat shirt he was wearing? That wasn't a normal outfit for him, he looked, well different. Like a poor attempt at wearing clothes for being out on the streets, if he skipped the oversized sweatshirt and turned it to something else maybe it would be more of a believable outfit…wait why was he thinking about that now? He needed to worry about Bear._

 _Ponch sped up and got to the alley and turned in time to see Bear and Big G making their normal exchange again, and Ponch's eyes grew wide, fear shot through his body knowing how dangerous things like that could be having done it before in the past and he worried for his friend. He wasn't able to stop himself before the words came out "BARRY!" he cried._

 _Bear turned seeing Ponch, a look of hurt and confusion on his face then he looked back to Big G._

 _"You brought a friend with you!?" Big G asked angrily. "We're done, Bear get your junk elsewhere I don't want him bring the cops down on me," Big G said then split._

 _Bear took off too as soon as he saw Ponch coming and he was scared to death what might be going through Ponch's head at that moment. He wasn't ready to answer questions yet so he ran. Ponch ran after him._

 _"Barry!" he called out again, he was confused and scared and didn't know what he had just seen. He wanted to find and talk to his friend and get things straightened out. What was it he was getting from that drug dealer anyway? Why was he going to a drug deal!? Ponch was starting to catch up, and when he got near the end of the alley he felt someone grab his arm._

 _Ponch stopped abruptly and turned to see an L.A.P.D. officer. More fear shot through Ponch as he knew what they must've been looking for. He began to squirm. "You caught the wrong guy, I didn't do anything!"_

 _"Stop fighting me and I'll believe you," the man said._

 _Ponch stayed completely still for a moment and felt the mans grip loosen and he let go of Ponch._

 _"I'm looking for a Big G, and a Barry Baricza," the officer said._

 _"Well, I'm Frank Poncherello I'm not either one of them," Ponch said._

 _"We'll see about that…let's go back to your place and see your drug stash," the officer said not believing Ponch._

 _"I'm not a drug dealer!" Ponch stressed._

 _Bear wasn't too far away and heard Ponch say that. He stopped and looked back at them. Part of him wanted to go help and another part of him didn't want to go get mixed up in everything._

 _"Barry!" Ponch cried out again as he was fighting with the officer._

oOoOo

Jon woke up suddenly having heard the name Barry being yelled loudly in the room. It sounded like Ponch yelling.

Jon felt himself grow angry inside having heard the name Barry. "Where is he, I'll kill him for showing up and scaring you," Jon said he looked and noticed no one was in the room besides Ponch…

Jon noticed something else then, Ponch was sitting straight up and panicking about something and he was still asleep.

"Ponch!" Jon yelled. "Ponch, wake up please!" Jon said. He pressed the nurse call button since he couldn't get to Ponch himself.

Brandi, Nikki, Amber, and Dr. Brackett all came in together. "What is it?" Amber asked but just as she was getting those words out she heard Ponch yelling more things in his sleep.

"No! Please!" Ponch yelled and began to squirm. "Barry!" he yelled again.

"We have to wake him up," Nikki said urgently. She went to the bed and gently shook Ponch. "Ponch, wake up!" she said.

Brandi went over to Jon's bed to keep him calm during all of this. "Jon, he'll be ok, don't worry," she said quietly.

"Are you sure?" Jon asked.

"I'm positive," Brandi said with a smile.

Nikki had finally gotten Ponch awake, but when she did Ponch was still panicking.

His breathing was heavy, his eyes darted around the room looking for Bear, his heart was beating faster and faster inside his chest and he felt like he almost couldn't breathe. He was sweating profusely, and a little shaky. He was panicked and scared. "B-B-Barry…" he said looking around.

"Bear isn't here, Ponch. What's going on?" Jon asked.

Ponch turned his head to look at Jon for a moment but didn't say anything. Kel knew he needed to calm down.

"Ponch, relax. Lay back down, take a few deep breaths and relax," Kel said.

Ponch tried to do what Kel said, it was easier said than done.

"I'll see about getting someone to go check on Bear for you if that's what you're worried about?" Jon suggested even though he didn't care right now about what was going on with Bear he knew Ponch did.

Ponch nodded his head as he was taking a few deep breaths. "Y-y-yes…please," he said.

Jon texted Grossie and asked him to check on Bear for Ponch, and he'd explain why later. Grossie said he would, but he was very confused and wanted to know more. Jon looked back at his friend with worry…what could he have been dreaming about now?


	19. Chapter 19

Grossie went to Bear's apartment that night, even though he didn't know why. There was a sinking feeling inside of him that maybe he was not the best choice of person to ask to check up on Bear. He'd seen how Bear was when he left the CHP that afternoon and he wasn't so sure how Bear would be feeling towards him when he showed up.

He walked up the door and knocked. He knocked hard. No one answered for a few moments, but he heard movement inside someone knocked something over by accident or on purpose Grossie didn't know which.

Finally the door was opened and Grossie saw a very exhausted Barry Baricza standing before him. This did not look like the friend he once hung out with. He had dark circles under his eyes from the countless nights of no sleep, his eyes held a cold, far away and hurt look to them. He looked as though he might've been slightly thinner and much more pale. Grossie wondered how well he had been keeping track of meals and taking care of himself. This whole accident was harder on his friend than Grossie had thought. He should've been there for him, but instead he was upset with him and treating him like dirt.

Grossie was hit with a feeling of guilt that hit so hard and heavy like having a brick thrown at him.

"What do you want?" Bear asked his voice was quiet, but held and icy tone to it.

"I…uh, Jon sent me over. He said Ponch wanted someone to check on you," Grossie said. He himself wasn't sure why he was there and it felt awkward.

Bear looked skeptically at the man in front of him. "Ok…" he looked behind Grossie to see if there was anyone with him. "Come in I guess," he said letting the man in.

Grossie came in then texted Jon and asked why he was there. When he received the text he got he was even more confused now. "Um…Jon says that Ponch was having a dream about you. It was a nightmare, he woke up screaming your name and having a slight panic attack and looking everywhere for you. Is something going on that we should be worried about?" Grossie asked looking to Barry again.

Bear swallowed hard and shook his head. "No…no nothing is going on. I uh, I'm going to be hearing from IA today about what will happen with me. Other than that nothing is going on, I've just been uptight…and of course angry," Bear said. His voice changed when he spoke this time. He was fighting to sound like his normal self so Grossie wouldn't worry. Bear himself was worried about what Ponch might've been dreaming of. He'd need to get to Ponch sometime when he was alone and ask. Maybe God was at work again and going to be using Ponch to help Bear? If that was the case, Bear wanted to know just how much Ponch had found out from his dream. It wasn't just a coincidence that on the same night Bear had gone through something rough Ponch happened to have a nightmare about him.

Grossie nodded his head. "Alrighty…well yeah, I was just here to check up on you. Make sure that you were alright then go tell Ponch. He was pretty worried," Grossie explained. He looked around the darkened apartment as he spoke. There was dust all over that could be seen from just the little light of the lamp on near the hall. The place was a mess, Bear hadn't cleaned in days. It also smelled funny, like there was something gone bad in the refrigerator. Grossie wasn't going to ask about it though. He turned to leave, scratching his nose a little while also plugging it a few times occasionally to get the smell out.

Bear didn't seem to notice he was lost in thought with other things. Mostly about his upcoming meeting with the investigators, and now his mind wandered back and forth between that and Ponch's dream. What could he have been dreaming of?

oOoOo

It was earlier that next day around nine o' clock. Jon was being released from the hospital. At the same time he was signing discharge papers the Poncherello family all came rushing in.

"Francis! Oh my gosh I heard about this morning!" Maria cried rushing to her son's bed. "I'm sorry about what happened. Whatever you were dreaming about I hope it isn't bothering you anymore," she said grabbing his hand.

"And gosh darn it I hope you stop having panic attacks! That is probably one of the scariest experiences ever," Robert added on to what Maria had said.

Ponch just stared at his family not saying a word.

Patti walked over to the bed. She was wearing a red jacket, that was buttoned up, Ponch couldn't see her shirt except that a hint of the fact it might be yellow. She was also wearing a pair of blue jeans. She smiled at her brother as she revealed a small brown sack. "I brought you something to cheer you up," she said.

"Really!?" Ponch asked suddenly excited for the first time in a while.

She nodded and handed it over. Ponch looked inside and found a couple of ding dongs and a twinkie. He smiled at his sister. "You mean they let you sneak those in here?" he asked surprised.

"They didn't question me a bit since I had it hidden in my jacket," she admitted.

Ponch smiled at her again. "Clever," he said then took one of the snacks.

"Now don't eat all of them at once. Wouldn't want you getting yourself sick…I mean you haven't had them in a while," Alfred said joining them.

Ponch smiled seeing his father. He knew his father cared about his health and that he didn't want Ponch getting sick, but he also knew that Alfred was just saying that because he wanted one of the snacks.

Ponch willingly handed over the twinkie, and Alfred gratefully accepted.

Jon just laughed and shook his head when he looked over at the family.

"So, what brings you guys all here so early?" Ponch asked knowing they were a half hour earlier than normal.

"Actually, Frank…" Martin started sadly looking down at his black dress shoes. "We came to say goodbye," he finished looking up.

Ponch looked shocked. "W-W-What?" he enjoyed having his family close by again it was hard to see them go.

"I'm sorry, honey but we need to get back to Chicago. We could only be away so long before we had to get back to work," Maria explained. She didn't really do much, but she did help out with Alfred's business when he needed her.

Ponch sighed and forced a smile trying to hide his disappointment.

"Hey, look on the bright side. You get out of the hospital soon, when you get home I will come back for a few weeks to hang out, keep you company and help with anything you need. But before I can do that I need to make sure my business is still standing," Alfred told his son. A small smile creeping across his face when he saw the excitement and sparkle coming back to Ponch's eyes.

"Really!? You're coming back?" Ponch asked his dad.

"Yes, I am…and if your apartment allows pets I might bring the dog and just drive down," Alfred said.

Ponch smiled even bigger now. Dogs cheered him up so much when he was sick or hurt. "That would be great! My apartment allows pets," he said.

Alfred smiled. "Alright, well I'll see you in a few weeks," he said before leaving.

Ponch frowned. He knew he'd more than likely be getting out sooner than that, right?

oOoOo

Bear sat in Getraer's office, the captain, Getraer, and Bates were with him. Kendall and Justin were also in the room.

"Officer Baricza, after carefully weighing the evidence, and even hearing from Poncherello you'll be happy to know the punishment won't be too harsh."

Bear straightened up a bit. A look of confusion on his face. He was ready for the hammer to come down and to lose his job.

"Officer Poncherello told us that he is certain you both hit at the same time, making part of the accident his fault. Yes you were distracted and pulled out in front of him and that was what caused it, but Officer Poncherello had also been distracted as well. His dream of the accident brought back memories that all who witnessed can confirm are true. He did indeed look back behind him at Grossman and Getraer before you two collided and he himself didn't see you until it was too late. That being said there were things that could've been done to avoid the accident," Kendall said.

Bear looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "Wait?"

"Both of you were distracted, for two completely different reasons. If you had kept your minds on the task at hand everything would've went along smoothly. You both won't get by without punishment, but you will not be losing your job. Poncherello practically begged us not to let that happen, and to be honest I wasn't going to let it happen myself," Kendall said.

Bear looked a little happier. "So what now?" he asked. "And uh…don't you think Ponch has been through enough with the injuries and everything? I mean you're not still handing out a punishment, are you?"

"Baricza, our job is to find out what happened. We only suggested a few things to your sergeant for punishment," Justin said.

Bear looked at Getraer.

Getraer cleared his throat. "I guess this is where I come into the conversation?" he said with a chuckle. "Baricza, I agree with you, Ponch has been through a lot…but we are going to keep him home from work an extra week on suspension. It's nothing too serious for him anyway in fact he might thank me for it, it takes away from some of the time he'll be at the desk."

Bear laughed at that. "What about me?" he asked.

"We'll do the same with you only yours will be a few days since you've already been being punished throughout this whole thing. You will also have a few days of desk duty."

Bear nodded. "Fair enough," he said. He felt relieved this was a lot nicer than he had thought it would be. He knew what had happened was serious, but everyone else knew that he and Ponch had pretty well taken quite a punishment for everything. And Bear was in shock to hear that some of the accident was Ponch's fault apparently. Well according to everyone else…Bear couldn't believe this! He wondered if Jon knew. Maybe Jon wouldn't be so hard on him if he knew that piece of information. Bear shrugged it didn't matter as much anymore. He was still thinking of leaving anyway but maybe his mind would be changed when Ponch got back…didn't Grossie say he had woken up? Maybe he should visit…


	20. Chapter 20

Ponch was laying in his bed, he wasn't feeling very well. Jon would be back in a few hours or so he was at home taking care of a few things cleaning wise. Then he was going to run over and clean Ponch's apartment in case it needed anything.

Dr. Adams had been in and out of Ponch's room multiple times. He kept checking up on him. They had just brought in a new patient for Dr. Adams to work with, someone with a bad case of pneumonia. He washed his hands, and tried not to be spreading it, but after being around that person so long Dr. Adams had come down with a little cough.

When Dr. Adams had come in and checked on Ponch this time Ponch could sense Dr. Adams wasn't feeling well, and it worried him that maybe he was being taken care of by a sick doctor.

Dr. Adams coughed a few times and tried to cover it up. Ponch stared at him.

"Are you sure you're not sick?" he asked sitting up a bit.

Ryan nodded his head while placing his hands in the pockets of his white doctors coat. He cleared his throat. "Yes, Ponch I'm fine," he said.

"Ok…well you might need to get that cough looked at it. It sounds nasty," Ponch said.

Ryan didn't say anything about that. He just nodded slightly. "You want to watch some TV or something? It's pretty quiet in here," he asked.

Ponch shook his head. "I think Jon should be here soon," he replied.

Adams nodded. "Alright," he patted Ponch on the shoulder and left the room.

Ponch watched as he left and was confused. What was up with Dr. Adams?

oOoOo

Bex was walking down the hall and headed for the doctor's lounge. She went inside to grab a cup of coffee and found her boyfriend sitting at the table with a cup of coffee trying to keep himself awake. He was tired from the long shift he had worked. Bex saw beads of sweat on his forehead, and his hair was a bit wet from it too. He coughed slightly, not realizing someone else had entered the room otherwise he'd have done everything he could to hide it.

"Ryan? Ryan are you alright?" Bex asked coming closer to him.

Ryan turned his head slowly and looked at his girlfriend. "Bex…I…I didn't even hear you come in," he said. He wasn't feeling well at all.

"Honey, I can tell you're not feeling well and you can't lie to me and say you're fine. I'm getting a doctor now and we'll take care of you," Bex said.

Ryan didn't like that idea. He pushed himself up from his chair leaning on the table a bit. Then he took care of his coffee cup and began to try to walk away.

"No! Don't leave," Bex said in a firm voice. "You're getting looked at by a doctor." She grabbed his arm and led him to a treatment room. As soon as they entered the room she went to the phone in the left corner of the room and called for Dr. Brackett to come in.

After getting off the phone Bex went back over to Ryan who was getting off the bed. "I don't want to get checked out, I'm fine," he said.

"No you're not," Bex replied quickly as she pushed him back onto the bed. "Stay!" she ordered then began getting his vitals and checking his temperature. "You have a temperature of 103 degrees, Ryan."

Kel had entered the room on that part of the sentence. "A fever?" he asked coming in.

"He's sick, but won't admit it," Bex said.

Kel put his hands on his hips. "Dr. Adams you are a doctor. If it were an injury it's understandable to try and hide it, but illness no. Especially not if it's contagious what if you went around spreading your sickness to other patients?"

Adams just stared at him.

Dr. Brackett began examining him. "Even injuries need to be looked at you shouldn't hide them. I know I said it was understandable, but you know what I meant so don't go around thinking otherwise. I don't know what is wrong with you, you used to be a good doctor but you changed for the worse this year."

Ryan looked at Kel. He knew he wasn't the best at being sympathetic at times, but he always wasn't the most kind.

"Who have you been caring for today? Maybe you caught this from a patient," Kel said knowing that was something that had happened a few times.

"Just a few new people that have come and gone today and I checked up on Ponch a few times…and uh then there was this guy with a bad case of pneumonia," he replied.

Kel frowned. "And were you feeling sick when you checked on Ponch?" he asked a bit concerned.

"A little maybe," he replied reluctantly admitting to that.

Kel had a growing concern with that, especially when he found that Adams had pneumonia after a few moments of the check up.

"I'm going to send you home for now with antibiotics, if the pneumonia gets worse then come in," he said.

Ryan nodded and started to get up and leave when the door opened and Jon peeked his head in. "Dr. Brackett?" he asked.

Kel turned to see the young blonde officer standing there, worry expressed in his blue eyes.

"What's wrong, Jon?" he asked.

"It's Ponch…" he started.

Kel didn't need to hear any more after that. He left nurse Bex to finish with Adams. Kel and Jon went to Ponch's room.

Ponch was laying in bed, eyes closed trying to rest. He had thrown up a few times, and the nurses in the room took care of it. He like Adams had beads of sweat on his face and his hair was wet from the sweating. He had a bad fever and chills, he felt miserable.

Kel came over. "He probably has pneumonia, passed on from Dr. Adams," he informed the others in the room.

"What!? Shouldn't Adams have stayed home if he was sick?" Nikki asked growing upset suddenly.

"He knew he was sick, but didn't know how sick. To him it was only a small cold at first," Kel explained.

Brandi clenched her fists tight then went to Jon. "I can't believe this…" she muttered.

Jon was too upset to speak. He wasn't sure he'd ever talk to Dr. Adams again. He wondered if he would even keep his job with how poorly he'd been acting lately.

Jon came beside Ponch's bed. Then he looked at Dr. Brackett. "He'll be ok, right?" he asked cautiously.

"He should be, but this is very serious right now we'll be checking in on him a lot more often and starting some antibiotics right away hopefully he can fight this well."

"Can I stay with him?" Jon asked.

Kel nodded. "Just make sure you don't get too close and get yourself sick."

oOoOo

Jon stayed by Ponch's side the whole time he was sick, even through the hard hours when his fever had gotten up high and Ponch was having a hard time fighting even with the help of the medication. Jon had never prayed so hard until these last few months with Ponch in the hospital, and he was amazed with how fast his friend was recovering. He was even more amazed the day Kel and Joe came in to tell Ponch he would be going home soon.

It was a Monday morning, the sun shined brightly outside and in through the window peeking through the curtain until finally Jon got up and opened the curtain to let it come in. The TV had been off for a while, and Ponch was asleep. Jon had been leaning against the wall and sitting in a chair he was reading a book.

Doctors Early and Brackett entered the room then with Dixie not too far behind them. She smiled seeing Ponch was fast asleep still. He had been fighting off that pneumonia all week and finally had gotten to feeling better on Sunday morning. He was exhausted though still.

"Hi," Jon said sitting up and looking at the group of three.

"Hello, Jon," Kel replied.

"Did you come to check on Ponch?" Jon asked.

"Actually we came to talk to him, but I see he's still sleeping," Joe replied with a small smile.

"I'm sure I can tell him whatever you need to tell him," Jon said. But as soon as he said that Ponch was starting to wake up. "Nevermind you can tell him," he said with a laugh.

Ponch opened his eyes and looked around the room. "W-W-What's going on?" he asked with a yawn and a stretch.

"We just thought you might like to know that you are going home on Wednesday if you're up to it."

"Are you kidding!? I still have a home that isn't here?" Ponch said with a laugh.

Joe and Dixie laughed Kel just shook his head.

Jon smiled he had to go to work soon he looked at his watch. Fifteen more minutes. He'd spread the news to everyone when he got there, it was great! And he couldn't believe it Ponch was actually going home for the first time in months.

Ponch smiled and looked at Jon. "Baker, I actually get to go home soon!" he said and Jon could see tears in his eyes.

He patted Ponch's shoulder. "I'm happy for you, partner," he said smiling bigger than he had in months. Things were looking up for them now, and it was a nice change. What Jon and Ponch didn't know was that things were about to go downhill again only this time for one of their friends…would they be ready for it?

~end

 _A/N: Thank you so much for reading! Thank you for those that have stuck with me this whole time and those who have joined in along the way. I love you and thanks for the support! I'm not sure yet on the title but I do have a sequel in the works, so be looking for that! :D_

 _~Ponchy_


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